|
Some tips for you guys and girls from today's Toronto Star:
The long goodbye in Montreal
You realize you really don't want to leave
Saying goodbye in Montreal is never a simple affair.
Compared to Toronto's relatively terse toodle-oos, goodbyes there can be long ... and languid ... and lingering.
The hellos — while not quite so protracted — also take a fair bit of time and involve a certain amount of social interaction not usually expected in our urban hive of hurried hi's.
Bonjour is the usual starting point for people you don't know well (e.g. tradespeople, store clerks) or people you don't like (e.g. life insurance salesmen, neighbours, relatives).
Salut is the nicely informal way of greeting someone you know well (and like) or that you would like to get to know better. Salut, however, is just the beginning.
The next step — especially if the Quebecer greeting you suspects you're an uptight anglo from Ontario — is to seize you by the shoulders, pull you close and plant a kiss on both cheeks.
Three quick rules:
First, don't let your discomfort show at this unaccustomed familiarity.
Second, no air-kissing when you're reciprocating.
Third, if you're a man unused to kissing another man — this custom is wonderfully gender-neutral — be a sport and do it anyway.
This form of greeting has slowly been creeping its way into some of Toronto's trendier social circles.
But it's rarely done well — often so stiffly and inelegantly — it's like watching two mannequins bump together.
And salut, like shalom and aloha, can also mean goodbye.
With high-school French on par with the vin ordinaire sold in local dépanneurs — adequate for humble fare but definitely not for a special occasion — it has taken some time to get to know Montreal and start to see it in the way its habitants do on a daily basis.
Compared to hustling, bustling modern Toronto, it is a city of fading gentility, an aging northern belle with a slower gait and a laissez-vivre attitude. Except, inexplicably, on the city's roads and highways where an amateur version of the Grand Prix seems to be running every day of the year.
The rivalry between the two cities goes well beyond the Leafs and Habs, spanning many decades.
But Montreal's je ne sais quoi advantages are no longer so pronounced.
Their restaurants are still a little better (and cheaper). But we offer a far greater range of international cuisine.
Montreal's pockmarked rues and avenues often resemble Beirut's once bombed-out byways. But the architecture in Montreal — old and new — is usually eye-catching and inspired.
In Toronto, our potholes are as numerous, just newer and not as deep and we still have the unfortunate tendency of putting up condos and subdivisions that look like they've been cloned.
Montrealers visiting Toronto do express a grudging respect for the city's economic might, diversity and its flourishing arts scene and nightlife.
Still, it's hard to escape the sense that they're having a better time.
Mais je fais une digression.
And that's the thing about goodbyes. They are full of digressions, diversions and last-minute tête-à-têtes.
Goodbyes there never seem to happen just once and in just one location.
It's like drinking rounds of bar shots with a large group of friends. You want to make sure you clink everybody at least once.
But after more than a few rounds, you are no longer quite sure who you have or haven't clinked, so you may have to clink some of them again.
At last, you've bid your adieux — once, twice, it's hard to say — and you've made it out the front door.
But after the long goodbye, a longing fills you and with a heavy heart, you realize you really don't want to go. It is hard to say salut to Montreal.
Better then to say au revoir, à la prochaine or à la retour, which means you're coming back.
___________________
[/IMG]http://i54.tinypic.com/ngycqo.png[/IMG]
|
