quote:

Originally posted by Krypton Probably running high school track. We had a pretty strict coach who sometimes wouldn't let us drink water. So asking to use the bathroom was a no no. I ended up shitting my pants for the team (in secret). Luckily I had a change of clothes...

I had an asshole english teacher who refused to let us use the washroom and locked the door to the classroom. I kept asking to go, he wouldn't let me. I waited for group work and tried to slink out the door unnoticed as he made rounds of the tables. I got caught and scolded.

So I pissed in the garbage can in the corner of the classroom. You should have seen/heard this guy when he saw me. I got suspended and my 'rents went and laid into the principal...because really it was that or piss my pants. My suspension lasted 2 hours, I was in class the next day. Door unlocked.

Score one for the little guy.

___________________
If you can't be good, be careful.

"Hey look, I can make a heart-shape with my hands!!!" So Fucking what? Stop it. You're a douche.

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in the eyes of your enemies.

I found that one of the most peculiar and annoying things about public school: the strict regulation of student's bowel functions.

That really is fucking weird...good call. So unhealthy too.

quote:

Originally posted by jennypie That really is fucking weird...good call. So unhealthy too.

I was a popular subject of conversation for a while after that.

___________________
If you can't be good, be careful.

"Hey look, I can make a heart-shape with my hands!!!" So Fucking what? Stop it. You're a douche.

When life gives you lemons, squirt the juice in the eyes of your enemies.

Once I stopped a shoplifter and I was trying to apprehend him because he wasnt cooperating. Finally got him cuffed and i started to smell shit. I looked down and saw liquid coming down this guy's leg. Needless to say I scared the shit out of him!

I had to take the worst shit once and soon as i got to the gas station, I went into the bathroom and first there was shit already lying in the toliet and second the toliet didnt flush but since i had to go sooo bad i just did on top of the other shit, while instead of sitting down i just hovered over the toliet, yeah it was really bad on top of the other one as well, and it smelled horrible, i feel bad for the poor soul who had to clean that up, but afterwards I felt better

___________________
"Do not dwell in the past, do not dream of the future, concentrate
the mind on the present moment"

During the exhibition of some gardens in Prague...
Luckily there were some restrooms after ~1.5 hours of holding it in.
One of the biggest relieves in my life.

seems like every time I ever go into this particular Mall's bathroom, some old guy is in their pushing and grunting as hard as he can, blowing out his o-ring. I can't help to laugh my ass off in their at them.

years ago on holiday at a theme park type place. I'd had a bad burger I think from a dodgy place early on and a couple of goes on a big coaster made my guts turn. I went to the places loos and they were all flooded, so i decided to try the mcdonalds nearby. get there after quite a run and the stalls in the mens are in use so somehow i got into the disabled one, locked the door just in time for it to pour out into the loo. I got funny looks as i went in & straight to the loo, and even funnier when i just walked straight out after

quote:

Originally posted by MrJiveBoJingles

This is just epic. His choice of words is astounding. Five stars.

quote:

Originally posted by iammesol Ok, so I was in England this summer. My family and I are walking around the walled city of Chester. My Dad and I decide we have to go to the bathroom REALLY bad, so we start walking faster, in hopes of getting to our pub-hotel in time to pee. We failed. He decides to pee on the side of the street (coincidentally beside an elementary school LOL). I, being the "good boy" I am, decide to actually find a toilet. I walk ahead of my Dad, desperately trying to get to the other side of the wall, because I know we only had a little more to go. Unfortunately, I am retarded. A bridge comes up that looks exactly like the stone wall we're traveling on, and I TURN RIGHT, thinking of course, that I'm following the wall perfectly and I will soon have my pee. Turns out, I end up going about a km down the road, OUT of the city, and into a residential area. At this point I panic. I'm alone, in a foreign country, and have to FUCKING TAKE A PISS. I start running, trying to find ANYTHING public so I can let this stuff out, and nothing is around. Instincts take over and I started running like I've never run before. Finally I find a park, run into a washroom on site (whilst the English teenagers around stare going "Who the fuck is that?") and have the most relieving pee I've ever had in my 18 and 1/2 years of life. It was over. But wait, I was still alone and lost in a foreign country

haha thats the city I'm from, and I know what you're talking about by how that bridge walk leads into housing areas... kinda confusing if you are a holiday maker... nice city over-all though eh?