i dont ask for advice that often on here but i would appreciate some on this track, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yfk4...re=channel_page
what can i do to make it sound better i tried my hardest on this one. its been played in a a club too and they loved it apperantly but i want your opinions what can i do to make it better before i
send it out

___________________
http://www.facebook.com/pobsky
http://twitter.com/pobsky

Pro production quality.
Perhaps that airy breathing-like sound is slightly too loud. The electro bassline coming after the break might sound better with 1/8 or 1/4 triggers instead of 1/16.
The basic saw/square you have at the electro part at the end of each 4 bars sounds kinda amateurish, i'd recommend some fast delay with stereo bouncing, some chorus, gating, something to make it interesting, atm it stands out as non adequate. At 6 minutes, everything just comes in, there's some swooshup, transition, filter and drum drama missing here.
You're kinda weak on filtering transitions, there's too much of "sound comes / sound fades", not enough drama in transitions, some drum breaking there and good filtering can come a long way.
Oh and the classical mistake of ending the sidechain trigger too soon, the finishing whoosh of the track slams in full in the last few seconds :P

Other than that, it's definitely worth pimping up, one of the best bedroom tracks I've heard in a while, and I'm damn picky

Finish it up, get a remix or two, don't bother much without remixes, bigger labels don't care, for a good package though I think Alter Ego would be a pretty good address to send it to

___________________
www.myspace.com/retrackd

It has big potential. It's not exactly my type of trance but I agree with everything stated above and I think the basis of the track is solid. Just tune 'er up some

Last edited by mfitterer1 on Sep-19-2009 at 11:21

quote:

Originally posted by Tarpex Pro production quality. Perhaps that airy breathing-like sound is slightly too loud. The electro bassline coming after the break might sound better with 1/8 or 1/4 triggers instead of 1/16. The basic saw/square you have at the electro part at the end of each 4 bars sounds kinda amateurish, i'd recommend some fast delay with stereo bouncing, some chorus, gating, something to make it interesting, atm it stands out as non adequate. At 6 minutes, everything just comes in, there's some swooshup, transition, filter and drum drama missing here. You're kinda weak on filtering transitions, there's too much of "sound comes / sound fades", not enough drama in transitions, some drum breaking there and good filtering can come a long way. Oh and the classical mistake of ending the sidechain trigger too soon, the finishing whoosh of the track slams in full in the last few seconds :P

Tarpex has got all of the technical stuff out the way , I would like to talk about the music if you will.
The actual tune is nothing catchy and i probably wont listen to this again.Its too flat and no real punch or energy to it.But that seems the way these days and tbh this probably would slot right into a current PvD set , but i warn you , he has gone downhill.

But thats my opinion , im not one for all this new ASOT style trance but many people are and people will like this , but not me sorry :-(

p.s Where about in bolton are ya?

___________________

Bring on my soundcloud ya!

How did you make that voicy sound thingy?
It comes at around 1:12.. How did you make that? It sounds awesome.
And that after breakdown bassline.. It sounds pretty nice too.. What did you use for that?

Overall , a pretty good track I would say this is.
Only critque I have would be the semi buildup at 4:51 .
It sounds too empty.. Maybe some sweeps and FX can fill the emptiness.
But still , Nice job!


Btw at 4:49.. That girl is familar.. xD

I like the way it all builds, but for me it looses energy and vibe when the chords change - those changes just make it seem to lose speed and impact, so i'd say tweak a few notes until the 'ooh yea' factor is imparted.

The plucky thibng playing along with those same chord changes when they first come in, does'nt sound pro enough.


NOW - That vocal ah repeating thing gives me a feel this could be a big track - ah, now Ive just got tingles - that was a surprise at about 5 mins in, but now a sub bass has come in and stolen too much vibe and energy - that needs attenuating, mid freq dropping or somthing.

I love parts of this track - that ahh sound and when it drops at 5mins, but the rest is'nt up to the same par.

Some great ideas and sounds, but just needs a lot of work to focus the track on those key ideas AND then add that bspecial lead or something to give it a stand out personality.

Another thing - the open hat is just slightly presety - only slightly though.

Kinda rambling reply - sorry mate.


EDIT - just relistening and that bit at 5mins is GREAT - hardstyle stuff and could be a banging hit. I'd really take that part and make a new track - but that sub bass again just robbs the energy.

You know I've never said this before - I'd love to do a remake of this using the bit from 4.50. Imagine Ferry Corsten playing that out!

___________________
https://soundcloud.com/butlerrichard

quote:

Originally posted by adi_hanson The actual tune is nothing catchy and i probably wont listen to this again.

agree

quote:

Originally posted by adi_hanson that seems the way these days and tbh this probably would slot right into a current PvD set

double agree

the track sounds very good mate
nothing particularly stands out to me musically, but it could definitely get released and be a hit!!

edit: needs a fair bit of work after the breakdown, just EQing and whatnot to make it all fit together a bit better.. lots of stuff clambering to be heard there

___________________
-Everything I Say is a Lie-

i really appreciate all your thoughts and advice so far thanks im on my phone at mo but i will get back and reply in more detail tommorrow when im at at home im glad you like it im defo gonna work at it some more now!

___________________
http://www.facebook.com/pobsky
http://twitter.com/pobsky

I agree with most of what Tarpex and Richard Butler said. Especially the "NOW - That vocal ah repeating thing gives me a feel this could be a big track - ah, now Ive just got tingles - that was a surprise at about 5 mins in, but now a sub bass has come in and stolen too much vibe and energy - that needs attenuating, mid freq dropping or somthing." is the same how I feel.

I think you have a good tune here, with just minor tweaks making it a great tune. That plucky thing at around 2:50 needs to o though. Also, I don't really like how the track goes into the breakdown - you have this really fast paced song and then suddenly some breakbeat thing comes - the breakdown isn't half bad, but the way it goes into it is what doesn't sit with me.

...

Actually now that I've listened to it a couple of times I agree with Richard Butler: that Aah thing is what makes this track. I would make this a lot longer and build on that, maybe put some small melody on top of it and then build it, build, build it,... then stop. And we enter a really fast part with some hard sounding lead or just continue with the Aah part (but lose the melody). This electro lead that comes in after the break isn't doing it for me.

Also, I agree about the transitions. Definently need to work on that.


Overall, this is just nitpicking it, but I guess that's what you wanted to hear? Not bad, not bad at all. With some tweaking, this could be a real banger for sure.


I think this is the 4th time I've listened to it since I started typing.

quote:

Other than that, it's definitely worth pimping up, one of the best bedroom tracks I've heard in a while, and I'm damn picky

thanks for your comments! regarding your advice i agree with most of what you have said and im gonna to try the things you have suggested, the problem i have always had is getting round to finishing my tracks properly once there at this stage i kinda rush them just so i can play them to friends at partys and stuff, i have never sent anything to labels but i think its about time i did do and just thought this track would be a good one to do just that if i work more on the mixing and arrangement aspects

1 question for you when you say get a remix or to are you sugesting i get people to remix this track or for me to remix afew of other peoples tracks?

quote:

p.s Where about in bolton are ya?

I live in deane in bolton near haslam park pal!

quote:

How did you make that voicy sound thingy?

glad you like the track pal, its a reverse effect sample i just chopped it near the end added abletons receptor to it which gave it a delay type effect and then its got alot of warmverbs reverb on it which is sidechained to the main kick. the elctro bit is a factory preset from z3ta slight sidechained to the main kick with some low cut on it

quote:

Btw at 4:49.. That girl is familar.. xD

someone on here has a pic of her in there avator profile thing!

quote:

but that sub bass again just robbs the energy.

ok so im going to get rid of the sub bass and change the the part at the end of each bar to something more interesting but if im honest with you all, when evrything kicks back in after the electro bass it has all been rushed from there because i was on a deadline to get it finished so i didnt particulaly like it from there anyway, i will make sure it has a more solid sounding outro from that point too

quote:

That plucky thing at around 2:50 needs to o though. Also, I don't really like how the track goes into the breakdown - you have this really fast paced song and then suddenly some breakbeat thing comes - the breakdown isn't half bad, but the way it goes into it is what doesn't sit with me.

ive had mixed oppinions about the breakbeat thing, i am considering scrapping it entirely, not sure yet what but im gonna try something different, maybe something similar to what patterson would do or stonface & terminal in there breakdowns

Anyway thnks for all your feedback its exactly what i needed to get me motivated to work on the track more so im glad i posted it here now rather than the promo section, i will let you know how i get on with and post a link to the next version when im done with it any more advice would be gratefull even if it is just nitpicking cheers

___________________
http://www.facebook.com/pobsky
http://twitter.com/pobsky

Hi just quick sorry got to go out I really liked your song the plucks are well trancey and fit really well. the electro bass is ok i think as it is.

thanks

___________________
My Links
Ocean State recordings
My Myspace
Facebook
Soundcloud

Processing a highly structured and complex pattern of sensory input as a unified percept of "music" is probably one of the most elaborate features of the human brain.....understanding how music is perceived and how it may elicit intense sensations is far from being understood.

quote:

Originally posted by chrisspob 1 question for you when you say get a remix or to are you sugesting i get people to remix this track or for me to remix afew of other peoples tracks?

Pimp this tune out, then get a remix or two for it.
Labels are way more keen on full-release packages out of the box with new artists than having them provide them to a relative nobody at that point. Of course, all of the material has to pass the QA, so pick people who know their shit.

___________________
www.myspace.com/retrackd