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I agree with Djaroo you have too much going on at once. A lot of newbie mistakes happen when they try and do too much what you want to do is have just one theme in the song and focus everything on that one theme
Think about it if everyone is in the club dancing going crazy at one of your themes of your song each time it changes up they will stop dancing to it or if they are listening to it on there cd or ipod they will go to the next artist.
The second thing i noticed is the note lenghts all seem to be the same with the same velocity try and make the notes longer and a real instrument i mean a real musician will not play each note the same velocity even though you are programming it you still want to program it like it was played by a band or sounds as real as possible.
One thing that may help you is imagine your at a concert you never see the guy on the guitar,the sax,the violin,the piano,the keyboards whatever you never see them playing there own solo at the same time.
no you dont so if i were you i would create space for example find the best theme in your song and focus your whole song on that and dont have every track playing the same time it just gets crowded and each track is not getting heard.
thats my 2 cents
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