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I agree that the under 18s events suck, but I'm afraid that's life...under 18s places played cheesy commercial shite when I was 16-17, probably played it when everybody else on this board was that age, and they'll probably still be playing the same type of stuff in 30 years time.
But that's just a perception thing. It's a natural association: under 18 = teenybopper. Probably not true in a lot of cases, but very true in most others. And promoters see it the same way too. It's all about catering for a market. If you got all the nightclubbing inclined, trance-loving under 18's in Sydney together, you'd probably find there aren't a lot of you.
Dance music tends to be music that you only find as you get older. In my case, I didn't really discover good dance music until I was 18 when I was still into grunge metal. I was dragged down Oxford St a few times to places like NV and DCM, realised the music wasn't half as bad as I thought it was, flipped on Wild FM the next day, and my education had begun. Note that that was in the days before Wild started playing cheesy commercial crap purely to appeal to the under 18's.
So you just happen to be a rare breed, someone lucky enough to have seen and heard good music before your time .. your time will come, young grasshopper 
But in terms of over 18s events, I don't think it's as bad as you say. Sure most places do play funk/rnb/house shite, but there are the exceptions. Icebox on Thursdays is apparently pretty good (never been tho ), Sublime Fridays will usually play hard trance, Gas on Saturdays also has pretty good music.
Agreed, three clubs isn't much, it would be good to see more, but I don't know if there is enough new trance being produced both here and overseas to satisfy demand. You don't want to be hearing the same tracks over and over again (like Tiesto's sets this year )
So yeah, chin up mate. Sorry for the post length  
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