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There is not much I can tell you except gear is everything.
I to was in your shoes about 2 years ago and I slowly started getting a decent mix of gear which included a external card and headphones designed for flat response mixing (due to where I live I cannot use monitors).
I also had a situation where I had this song. My composition and arrangements were solid but my production was shear crap. I asked a friend to do a proper mix down and he came in and did just that.
Upon listening to his mix the only thing I could say was "He screwed up my song" when in fact, he didn't. The truth was that he made all the correct adjustments with EQ,compression and some limiting.After which was all correct,however...how it sat in the mix was nothing like what I wanted. So, the issue was me. I learned a valuable lesson that day and started learning basic EQ and I now mix as I go.
In a nustshell, I don't believe you want another pair of ears in a mixdown. Mastering, this is the purpose to do so. But a mixdown? This is YOUR artistic expression and I do believe you would lose that with another pair of ears
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Phil
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