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The Montreal Bicker Thread (pg. 11)
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| FunKenLouis |
lol i funken look arabic and spanish at the same time...
anyways i dont give a funk about what you say about irish peeps...theyre the bests:D
now lets have some fun about those bagpipes fo yours alec...
Bagpipes (noun) - I understand the inventor of the bagpipes was inspired when he saw a man carrying an indignant, asthmatic pig under his arm. Unfortunately, the man-made object never equaled the purity of sound achieved by the pig. -Alfred Hitchcock |
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| FunKenLouis |
I love this thread...hehe
Q. How do you get a piper out of a tree?
A. Cut the noose.
Q. What’s the difference between a piper and a walrus?
A. One squeals a lot and the other is a walrus.
Q. What’s the difference between an in-tune piper and Bigfoot?
A. Bigfoot has been spotted.
Q. Why do so many people take an instant dislike to the bagpipes?
A. It saves time.
Q. Why do bagpipers always walk when they play?
A. To get away from the sound.
_Q. What's the difference between a cat in the road and a bagpipe in the road?_
A._ People usually swerve to MISS the cat.
Q. How do you get two bagpipes to play a perfect unison?
A. Shoot one.
Q. What's the definition of a minor second?
A. Two bagpipes playing in unison.
Q. What's the difference between a bagpipe and an onion?
A. No one cries when you chop up an bagpipe.
Q. What's the difference between a bagpipe and a trampoline?
A. You take off your shoes when you jump on a trampoline.
Q. How can you tell a bagpiper with perfect pitch?
A. He can throw a set into the middle of a pond and not hit any of the ducks.
Q. How is playing a bagpipe like throwing a javelin blindfolded?
A. You don't have to be very good to get people's attention.
Q. Why did the chicken cross the road?
A. To get away from the bagpipe recital.
Q. What do you call bagpiper with half a brain?
A. Gifted.
Q. How is playing a bagpipe like throwing a javelin blindfolded?
A. You don't have to be very good to get people's attention.
Q. If you drop a bagpipe and a watermelon off a tall building, which will hit the ground first?
A. Who cares?
Q. If you were lost in the woods, who would you trust for directions, an in-tune bagpipe player, an out of tune bagpipe player, or Santa Claus?
A. The out of tune bagpipe player. The other two indicate you have been hallucinating.
Q. How do you make a chain saw sound like a bagpipe?
A. Add vibrato.
Q. What's the definition of a gentleman?
A. Someone who knows how to play the bagpipe and doesn't.
Q. Why do bagpipers leave their cases on their dashboards?
A. So they can park in handicapped zones.
Q. What's the difference between a dead bagpiper in the road and a dead country singer in the road?
A. The country singer may have been on the way to a recording session.
Q. What's the range of a bagpipe?
A. Twenty yards if you have a good arm.
Q. What do you call someone who hangs around with musicians?
A. A bagpiper.
Q. What did the bagpiper get on his I.Q. test?
A. Drool.
Q. What's one thing you never hear people say?
A. Oh, that's the bagpipe player's Porsche.
Q. Why do bagpipers always walk when they play?
A. Moving targets are harder to hit.
Q. How do you know if a bagpipe band is at your front door?
A. No one knows when to come in.
Q. Why are bagpipers fingers like lightning?
A. They rarely strike the same spot twice.
-Tom: "Hey, Buddy. How late does the bagpipe band play?"
-Buddy: "Oh, about a half beat behind the drummer."
Q. How can you tell if a bagpipe is out of tune?
A. Someone is blowing into it.
Q. How do you put a twinkle in a piper's eye?
A. Shine a light in his ear.
-Piper: "Did you hear my last performance?"
-Neighbor: "I hope so."
Q: Why do bagpipers walk when they play?
A: To get away from the noise.
Q: What's the only thing worse than a bagpiper?
A: Good question. We're still trying to find out too.
hope your not still proud of your fabulous instrument:D lol |
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| fastmp3 |
les quebecoééééé c'est vot' tour maudit criss tabarnak esti
TOP 10 REASONS TO LIVE IN QUEBEC
1. Everybody assumes you're an
2. Racism is socially acceptable
3. The only province to ever kidnap federal politicians
4. You can take bets with your friends on which English
neighbor will move out next
5. Other provinces basically bribe you to stay in Canada
6. The FLQ
7. Your hockey team is made up entirely of dirty French guys
8. The province with the oldest, nastiest hookers
9. NON-smokers are the outcasts
10. You can blame all your problems on the "Anglo bastards" |
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| FunKenLouis |
dont get me started on arabs....plz..
dont force me....plz plz plz....
i really dont wanna hurt you....but its gonna get crazy bad here if i start...
are you sure you want me to...
ok let me finish with the scotish... and youll have your turn mofo:D |
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| fastmp3 |
SPECIALE DÉDICASSE A TOUS LES PUTAINS D'ARABES DE CE FORUM (SAUF MOI)
You know you're an Arab when...(keep in mind you have to be Arab to get these)
1. You make Turkish coffee before leaving home,when getting to the office,after lunch, when having guests, before the guests leave, after the guests leave and before going to bed.
2. When shops have a sale they call your mom.
3. You still have, stored in suitcases, clothes that you used to wear when you were five .
4. You call an olderperson you've never met before "Ammo" or "Khaltu".
5. You hide everything from your parents, but they still think they know everything about you, and make you believe that they actually do.
6. People are never happy with what you've achieve; if you Graduated from school they'll tell you "Oqbal el Shahadeh el kbeereh", and when u get that "Oqbal el Aroos or Areees", and when you get that "Oqbal ma nefrah be Aoulad-kum", and when you get that "Oqbal ma tefrahu bi shahadit-hum", etc...
7. If you are a boy you start worrying about the Mukhabarat when you reach puberty.
8. Getting a visa to Europe or the States is like getting a baby, everybody tells you "mabrook"
9.You learn how to beg the personnel at the airport to allow the excess baggage you've got as soon as your father stops doing that for you.
10. Your dream is holding a different passport.
11. When you FLY BACK home you find 20 people waiting for you at the airport.
13. Every time you fly back home you meet relatives you never knew existed,and they look nothing like your family.
14. You look for universities as far away from home as possible.
15. You always curse at Arabs when you are back home, but when you live abroad you only make Arab friends.
16. When you come back from University you still have to live with your parents, and fight over curfew allover again, as if you never left them before.
17. Your relatives alone could populate a small city.
18. Everyone is a family friend.
19. You fight over who pays the dinner bill.
20. You teach Westerners to swear words in your language.
21. When you go out with non-arab friends you start thinking of lousy places where nobody would go to so you wont bump into family or friends.
22. You end up in a lousy place and still bump into the relative with the biggest mouth.
23. If you are 25 and not married yet, your parents make you feel that you are getting too old.
24. Getting married becomes the only way you can escape your parents.
25. You tell your friends how to rebel against their parents when you can't even stay out past midnight.
26. You always say "Open the light" instead of "Turn the light on" or "get down from the car" instead of "get out of the car."
27. You pronounce your p's as b's (bebsi and bolice)
28. You ask your dad a simple question and he tells you a story of how he had to walk miles just to get to school.
29. Your parents were ranked first in school.
30. Your dad swears at you with words that affect himself (Ibnil kalb)
31. You tell everyone that you are a successful businessman back home" when you are really just an unemployed goat herder.
32. You feel uncomfortable (or laugh) saying the word 'tease' in English.
33. You only walk on the streets in groups of seven or more people and talk really really loud in Arabic together.
34. You wear a black leather jacket, even when it is 100 degrees outside.
35. you think its cool to dance and smoke at the same time
36. If you are an Arab girl you give the look of death to another Arab girl who looks better than you.
41. Your aunt is always asking when she can dance at your wedding"
42. Your aunts are always trying to hook you up with relatives.
43. You eat breakfast for dinner
44. Causing a scene in public is no big deal.
45. You got 20 relatives named Mohammad or Ahmad. |
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| DJ Charlie |
lol
its all true !
except statement 45 doesn't apply to me :clown: |
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| alec |
| quote: | Originally posted by FunKenLouis
hope your not still proud of your fabulous instrument:D lol |
Man bagpipes are the sickest, when done properly no instrument can implement the raw power that they do! |
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| fastmp3 |
| quote: | Originally posted by alec
Man bagpipes are the sickest, when done properly no instrument can implement the raw power that they do! |
STFU |
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| Dj Nacht |
| quote: | Originally posted by fastmp3
STFU |
true dat brotha :D |
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| fastmp3 |
ladies and gentlemen , king malek from saudia
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