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quotes.
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| neoh |
Some famous quotes i've picked up over time:
"Save the tree's, wipe your ass with an owl."
"Man who live in outhouse, see many moons." - Confucious
"Man who farts in church, sits in own pew." - Confucious
"There's no difference between mice and man.. they both end up in ."
"Man who put in peanut butter jar is ing nuts." - Confucious
"The more I study religions the more I am convinced that man never worshipped anything but himself" -Sir Richard F. Burton
"Cocaine is god's way of saying you're making too much money." - Robin Wlliams
"Holy Shi..." - Tupac
"He who laughs last, thinks slowest."
"I did NOT have sexual relashions with that woman." - Bill Clinton
:D |
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| Dmatrox |
| There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't |
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| neoh |
| quote: | Originally posted by Dmatrox
There are 10 kinds of people in the world: those who understand binary, and those who don't |
do you? |
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| Dmatrox |
010110010110010101110011
There are actually 00110010 not 10 people |
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| Izzy |
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Everyone must believe in something. I believe I'll have another drink.
Alcohol doesnt solve any of your problems, but then agian neither does milk
When I read about the evils of drinking, I gave up reading
Reality is an illusion that occurs due to lack of alcohol.
An intelligent man is sometimes forced to be drunk to spend time with his fools.
You're not drunk if you can lie on the floor without holding on.
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early bird gets the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese.
Dont lay more eggs then you can hold in your basket.
If at first you don't suceed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
If at first you dont succeed your doing it wrong
He who laughs last, thinks slowest.
living for tomorrow is a waste of today
Never argue with an idiot. They'll drag you down to their level then beat you with experience.
The only difference between genius and stupidity is that genius has its limits.
Lottery: A tax on people who are bad at math.
42.7% of all statistics are made up on the spot.
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"When I was a kid I used to pray every night for a new bicycle. Then I realised that the Lord doesn't work that way so I stole one and asked Him to forgive me."
"If absolute power corrupts absolutely, where does that leave God?"
You found God? If nobody claims him in 30 days, he's yours!
"Heck is a place for people who don't believe in gosh."
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Mark Twain Quotes:
"Age is an issue of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter."
"Anger is an acid that can do more harm to the vessel in which it is stored than to anything on which it is poured."
"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
"It is better to keep your mouth closed and let people think you are a fool than to open it and remove all doubt."
"Those who think they know everything, are very annoying to those of us who do."
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If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?
Can you be a closet claustrophobic?
Why is the word abbreviation so long?
Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?
If a turtle loses it's shell... is it naked, or homeless?
Isn't it a bit unnerving that doctors call what they do "practice"?
If someone with multiple personalities threatens to kill himself, is it considered a hostage situation?
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| astroboy |
| Confucious say: "man who fishes in many wells often catches crabs" :nervous: |
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| nekholm |
| quote: | Originally posted by neoh
"Man who put in peanut butter jar is ing nuts." - Confucious
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:haha: |
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| Fundamental |
| quote: | Originally posted by astroboy
Confucious say: "man who fishes in many wells often catches crabs" :nervous: |
Hahaha. :stongue:
Confucious say: "Man with hole in pocket feels cocky all day." |
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| neoh |
alright, here's some confucious for you:
Confucius Says ...
Man who stand on toilet high on pot.
Man who jump off cliff, jump to conclusion.
Man who run behind car get exhausted.
Virgin just like balloon ... one prick, all gone.
Secretary not permanent until she screwed on desk.
Man who put in Peanut Butter jar is F***ing Nuts.
Man with tool in woman mouth May not necessarily be dentist.
Couple on 7-day honeymoon make hole weak.
Girl who marry Richard must kiss Dick.
Man with hand in pocket feel cocky all day.
Man who excels at putting worm on hook is Master Baiter
Man young when he snatches kisses, old when he kisses snatches.
Man who loses key to lady's apartment get no new-key.
Man who go to sleep with itchy butt, wake with smelly fingers...
War do not determine who right, war determine who left.
Man who walk through airport turnstile sideways going to Bangkok
Schoolboy who play with schoolgirl during wrong period, get caught red-handed.
Girl who sit on judge's lap get an honourable discharge.
Girl who go camping must beware of evil intent.
Man with tight trousers is pressing his luck.
He who farts in church sits in own pew.
He who sneezes without a handkerchief takes matters into his own hands.
He who fish in other's hole often catch crabs.
Man who go to bed with hard problem wake up with solution in hand.
Squirrel who run up woman's leg not find nuts.
He who kisses woman's ass get crack in jaw.
Passionate kiss just like spider web - lead to undoing of fly.
Girl who sit on jockey's lap get hot tip.
If you want pretty nurse, you got to be patient.
Man who stand on street corner with hands in pockets, not feeling crazy, feeling nuts.
Woman who go to bachelor apartment for snack get tit-bit.
Man who put rooster in Ice Compartment take out Stiff Cock.
No difference between man and mouse - both end in .
Nail on board is not good as screw on bench.
enjoy. |
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| Vigilante |
"Man who walk sideways through metal detector going to Bangkok."
- Confucious
ROFL when i first heard that. |
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