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Comfort Zone Basics
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| DigitalMP |
1. Don't ask because you don't want to know
2. Heaven's gate
3. Hell's
4. Be careful what you say & who you say it to; the CIA (Comfort Zone Intelligence Agency) does exist
5. 68% of the patrons are always more ed up then you!
6. The CZ Virus is real, exists only in the Zone and is only curable by not going to the zone for 4 consecutive wks.
7. Half of Americas Most Wanted can be found at the comfort Zone
8. If the Zone were to shut down the crime rate in the city would increase by 32%
9. If you decide to play the "do I stay or do I go" game you will lose!
10. Trust me you'll be back. Everyone comes back
11. Many people will remember you but you will remember none. Fake it.
12. Yes she is 16
13. Bartering, negotiating and haggling are common practice.
14. If she looks like a stripper she is. If she's not a stripper she's a man.
15. If she's a man warn friends.
16. If your a guy over 150 lbs your shirt will eventually come off for a pose down to show your muscles are bigger than some other juice pigs.
17. Do not try to distinguish between fear & pleasure at the zone. There is no distinction.
18. No I don't have any money you can borrow.
19. For every problem there is a chemical solution.
20. Enjoy your time here your famous... everyone is.
21. No really I don't have any money you can borrow.
22. The 3 degrees of separation theory applies.
23. Everyones not staring at you...unless you think they are.
24. You know its time to leave when;
a)You wake up in the Green Room in a puddle of piss with your empty wallet on your chest
b) You've already left you just didn't know it
c) You finally hear the Bouncer yelling at your friend to get that out of here & he's pointing at you.
d) When all your Comfort Zone associates say-DUDE, YOU LOOKED ED!-
e) You realize that the friendly fag you met earlier is giving you an EXTRA friendly message. And your enjoying it-
f) You've been partying for three days and think that one more pill/bump/line/cap will miraculously give you energy
g) The back hems of your designer jeans are tattered & black & your eyeballs are about to pop out of your skull
h) No one has drugs
i) Everyone looks familiar
j) No one looks familiar
k) When you look in the mirror and you mistake the white ring on the edge of your nostril for a powdered donut
l) You hear voices talking to you in the bathroom stall only to find out there is no one else there
m)You start talking to your genitals to hurry up & piss already
o) You stop breathing
p) You wonder around aimlessly, not knowing what to do w/ yourself
q) You consider checking in at the Waverly Hotel
r) The music stops but you think it's still playing dancing around like a madman
25. You know you've been going to comfort zone too long when;
a) All the friends you have now, you met at the Zone
b) You miss a wk at the Zone & wonder if its still there
c) You stopped hiding the fact that your a regualr patron
d) Your cool w/ the young baggy sweatsuit bandana wearing thugs & they're cool w/ you
e) You actually play a game of pool-
f) When your friend gets robbed & you console him
g) The bouncer searches you
h) You know the "Persians"
i) the sight of 3 uniformed police officers inside the zone is business as usual
j) the fear of being punched, stabbed, shot, raped or kidnapped has subsided
k) Its your only form of exercise and your sporting a 6 pack. And you attribute your fine figure to a healthy diet of Crystal Meth, Coke & G
l) You have seperate "Zone" clothes and shoes you bring out on Saturday night.
m) You stay in Saturday night so you can go out Sunday mornings
n) The bums at the mission know you
26. You know you've left the comfort zone when;
a) its time to go to work.
27. Top 10 reasons to stop going to the Zone;
a) Can't think of any right now, I'll get back to you on this. |
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| KevinEarth |
quote the post so everyone knows what you're referring to"
pfffffffhahahahahahah WTFITG ( who the is this guy )
hilarious......
that was a wonderful essay on The Comfort Zone in point form
but the conclusion is still up in the air....
reasons not to go back are pretty obvious....
a) the CZ virus
b) too many weird and pecular looking folk and the possibilities of being taken advantage of...
c) the homosexual handjob and liking it
d) sketching out to dekoze and knowing exactly what he's going to play next
e) and realizing "WTF am I doing" the party is over " I should be in bed " ......end of story
Amen for Christs' sakes it's sunday |
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| Pettiscool |
i just laughed my ass off.
All the more reason for me to finally check this place out one sketchy sunday...... except for the nobody ever doesnt' come back bit.... maybe cause its fun :D ...... a little skeptic still :nervous: ..... damn dekoze rips it though. |
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| charmscars |
| yup. it's still pretty funny. i got this in my e-mail a year ago or so. |
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| Shaya007 |
Here's one I got in my e-mail yesterday!
You know your stuck in the scene when......
* The total amount of sleep you get on weekends is the sum totals of how many times you've blinked since Friday night.
* You have sleeping patterns that would kill normal human beings
* You're dead against drinking alcohol, but will snort horse tranquillisers with no prompting needed.
* You start to think of Chuppa-Chups as a separate food group
* You can live for an entire weekend out of your backpack
* You're happy when there's a recession because it means more empty warehouses.
* While your friends are getting married and have kids, you're collecting yo-yo's and trying to remove chewing gum from your cargo pants
* You visit your folks and you've got absolutely nothing that you can say to your parents about your weekend.
* You can stand in front of a 12,000 watt speaker for an hour and be loving every minute of it.
* You grin whenever you see a commercial for"E News".
* You can keep a straight face while uttering "Honestly, not that many people are on drugs..."
* You're willing to spend $50 for a ticket for an event you might not even go to, & $50 for something that might be aspirin, but you're not willing to part with $3 for a bottle of water.
* You are driving your car home and feel like you're in a video game.
* You and your friends hear tumbling noises coming from he washing machine and all start to argue whether its jungle or house.
* Almost every letter of the alphabet has a separate meaning to you.
* You forget about your dreams of becoming a doctor and start to wonder what it would be like to be a cartoon character.
* You wallpaper your room with flyers.
* You've got a huge pile of dead glow-sticks in your room because you can't throw away because of 'sentimental value'.
* You lose 10 kilos in one night and the last thing you think about the next morning is food.
* Air, water, food, medication, - all hold equal importance to you.
* You've been close friends with someone for weeks without actually
knowing their name. |
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| Silky Johnson |
I don't know if I'm proud or ashamed that I can relate to most of those...Refer to CZ basic #25 c). Hahahaha.
:whip: :whip: :whip: :whip: :disbelief :happy2: |
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| mooreveedub |
| where is the Zone, the onetime I was there,I was *uck, you know I can not remember how I got there? |
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| Silky Johnson |
| quote: | Originally posted by mooreveedub
where is the Zone, the onetime I was there,I was *uck, you know I can not remember how I got there? |
480 Spadina @ College...don't ever question how you got there. ;) |
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| samhouse |
meh
missed Deko @ the zone this morning...ill be there 15th to round off a full weekend....Then i swear im going on a 2 month break.
I CAN DO IT DAMNIT!@!!!! |
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| Silky Johnson |
| quote: | Originally posted by samhouse
meh
missed Deko @ the zone this morning...ill be there 15th to round off a full weekend....Then i swear im going on a 2 month break.
I CAN DO IT DAMNIT!@!!!! |
No you can't, nyah nyah!!!
:p :p |
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| infinity HiGH |
"how did I get here?! what is this place?!"
They should get Lee Burridge to spin at Comfort Zone sometime. He's perfect for that kind of club (I think, I've never been to the Zone) |
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