| SkyHigh |
Due to increasing products liability litigation, American liquor manufacturers
have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following warning labels
be placed immediately on all varieties of alcohol containers:
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the
hell happened to your bra and panties.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a retard.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends
over and over again that you love them.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can
sing.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that
ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the
morning.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are able to
converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of
inexplicable rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you
are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may lead you to think people are
laughing WITH you.
WARNING:
The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
WARNING:
The crumsumpten of alcahol may mack you tink you can tipe
reel gude. |
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