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joke
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| chojin |
a donkey walks into a bar and asks the barman for a slice of toast.
the barman replies, we don't sell toast, we only sell alcohol
donkey leaves, comes back the next day: have you got any toast.
no we don't sell toast, would you like a pint?
donkey leaves, comes back have you got any toast?
barman: look mate, we don't sell toast, if you come in and ask me again i'm gonna nail your in ears to the bar
donkey comes back a few hours later:
excuse me, have you got any nails?
no
have you got any toast?
:stongue:
[sorry] |
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| mentalbarter |
haha
i aint heard that before
u shouldve put it in my toast threead tho :p |
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| tu_face |
i'm sure it was a duck and not a donkey... :p
another animal/bar joke:
a snail crawls into a bar and asks for a pint. the bar tender says " off, you arn't old enough to drink! sling yer hook!" and with that he picks up the snail and throws him out the door.
3 weeks later the slug comes back in to the bar and says "what did you do that for?!"
yes, i know its , but i like jokes. |
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| neoraver |
| quote: | Originally posted by chojin
a donkey walks into a bar and asks the barman for a slice of toast.
the barman replies, we don't sell toast, we only sell alcohol
donkey leaves, comes back the next day: have you got any toast.
no we don't sell toast, would you like a pint?
donkey leaves, comes back have you got any toast?
barman: look mate, we don't sell toast, if you come in and ask me again i'm gonna nail your in ears to the bar
donkey comes back a few hours later:
excuse me, have you got any nails?
no
have you got any toast?
:stongue:
[sorry] |
:stongue: :stongue: |
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| Lira |
| Oh, god :p :stongue: |
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| snowman99 |
Things That Are Better Left Unsaid
A husband walks into Fredrick's of Hollywood to purchase some sheer lingerie for his wife. He is shown several possibilities that range from $250 to $500 in price, the more sheer, the higher the price. He opts for the most sheer item, pays the $500 and takes the lingerie home.
He presents it to his wife and asks her to go upstairs, put it on and model it for him. Upstairs, the wife thinks, "I have an idea. It's so sheer that it might as well be nothing. I won't put it on, do the modeling naked, return it tomorrow and keep the $500 refund for myself." So she appears naked on the balcony and strikes a pose.
The husband says, "Good Lord! You'd think that for $500, they'd at least iron it!"
He never heard the shot.
Funeral services are pending...
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Stop Press!
La Parisian
Paris - August 5, 2004... The French government today stripped Lance Armstrong of all his gold medals earned during the tour de France.
According to French officials, he used substances that are banned in France.
They are deodorant, soap and toothpaste.
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Final Child Support Payment
Today is my daughter's 18th birthday. I'm so glad that this is my last child support payment. Month after month, year after year, those payments! I called my baby girl to come over to my house, and when she got there, I said to her :
"Baby girl, I want you to take this last payment to your Mama's house; you tell her that this is the last cheque she's ever going to get from me, then I want you to come back here and tell me the expression she had on her face."
So my baby girl took the check over to her. I was so anxious to hear what the witch had to say and what she looked like. When my baby girl returned, I said :
"Well now... what did she have to say?"
"She told me to tell you that you ain't my daddy." |
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