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X-Mas Gift under $20 for a chick? (pg. 6)
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| Halcyon+On+On |
Ahh, it is an age-old dilemma on what to get your mate to show her your readiness to fornicate.
It's an odd construct that humans have felt the need to typify and distort lesser animals into grotesque representations made of velvet, cotton, or some other soft material intended to elicit nostalgic memories of unconscious, maternal warmth. It is also an odd construct that many humans feel the need to impress their potential mates with large, shiny rocks or artificial pheromones which might, ironically, lead to the attraction of an alternate and competetive other mate; what other reason would the submissive female of the species have to desire such attractive measures? Perhaps, seperate of innate, biological yearnings, it is a purely social construct - a frame designed to ensure that only those mates who can impress nubile females with "riches" such as stuffed animals, perfume, and diamonds are allowed to mate; notwithstanding the immediate and inevitable yearnings of female survival - i.e. expensive food, chocolate, wine, etc...
I would liken our mating rituals to those of the Komodo Dragon. It is quite common for male komodo hopefuls during mating season to bring gifts of dead dogs or deer to their potential female suitors - whoever brings forth the most impressive array of dead meat gets the privelage to ensure his progeny. Why is this? Komodos subsist mainly on meat - it's obvious that assurance of survival, no matter how temporary, is the most important thing in regards to a female's willingness to mate with a particular male candidate.
So why is it that girls get so angry with you when you leave dead dogs on their doorstep? :conf: |
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| fitom tiel |
| you're not broke; you're a Secret Santa |
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| muzzybear |
| Body Shop products are awesome! They have a gift box with Almond Oil hand lotion that smells delicious and works really well. It comes with other stuff, too. A scent burner and tangerine or cranberry scent is really nice too. |
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| Slylee |
cd
dvd (chick flick)
starbucks or borders giftcard
or a $20 giftcard towards any sort of girly place like a day spa or victorias secret or a nice hair salon (find out which one she goes to). It may not cover a whole procedure, but hey, $20 bucks is $20 bucks and it certainly helps out towards anything. |
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| nchs09 |
| u should of bought her dog lots of chocolate if it keeps barking at j00! :p |
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| UWM |
LOL I first read that as "You should've bought that dog lots of chocolate"
As in the girl. |
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| Slylee |
| not everyone has a dog for a girlfriend uwm... |
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| UWM |
| When you post, all I see is "Bark, bark, woof, arf, bark!" |
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| Echo of Silence |
| quote: | Originally posted by muzzybear
Body Shop products are awesome! They have a gift box with Almond Oil hand lotion that smells delicious and works really well. It comes with other stuff, too. A scent burner and tangerine or cranberry scent is really nice too. |
ha ha! Can you guess what we do with Almond Oil? It "smells delicious and works really well!"
:D |
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| UWM |
| quote: | Originally posted by Echo of Silence
ha ha! Can you guess what we do with Almond Oil? It "smells delicious and works really well!"
:D |
I don't even want to go there ... |
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| Slylee |
| bark bark woof arf bark, huh? |
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