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Food for thought: Adultery, cheating and sleeping around (pg. 2)
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| Mr. Pink |
| quote: | Originally posted by igottaknow
maybe its time you switched teams? :gsmile:
:p |
like.......instead of the braves i should like the marlins?
no thanks buddy
:D |
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| dinoXpress |
OK, lets see.
I cheat on girls when im in different countries.
when in canada, i may cheat on the gf who is still in peru.
but if i go out with this girl i just met, i wouldnt cheat on her for anything. shes too awesome |
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| Xenocreator_PG_ |
| im over playen around. I'm a one dog bone! |
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| AlphaStarred |
| i say everything in sight. |
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| Arbiter |
| Have you forgotten economics 101? Competition leads to higher quality at a lower cost. What is monogamy if not a manifestation of decadence? |
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| {b.s.e.} |
| quote: | Originally posted by igottaknow
could someone make a long story short? my ADD doesn't allow me to read long paragraphs  |
i hope you're making a statement on society, and not as a 30 year old man.. |
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| dinoXpress |
| quote: | Originally posted by Nou
was gunna say teh same thing, but , highschoolers have more dramatic lives then any other age group.
unless your a coke whore. |
in which case ur life is less dramatic? |
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| Slylee |
| boyfriends are great! every girl should have at least 3:p |
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| igottaknow |
| quote: | Originally posted by {b.s.e.}
i hope you're making a statement on society, and not as a 30 year old man.. |
believe it or not 30 year olds have short attention spans too :rolleyes: |
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| dinoXpress |
| quote: | Originally posted by igottaknow
believe it or not 30 year olds have short attention spans too :rolleyes: |
pics or STFU! |
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| MisterOpus1 |
Had to chime in real quick, since Lira posted yet another insightful post. Here's my personal view:
I've been married 5 years, and the Mrs. and I have gone through a great deal of hardships together. The trouble is, by and large it was self-inflicted. The one thing that I have NOT considered indulging myself in, however, is an affair, and I can say with great confidence that my wife has not either.
Do we fight? yes, and some of them in the past were nasty and vicious as hell (verbally, that is). At one point in our lives together I think we both refused to grow the up just a little bit. The only problem was, we both realized that by not growing up just a bit, we were not being committed to one another. Pride kills, and it does a number on any relationship especially when communication breaks down. Granted, we still a ways to go in terms of continuing to openly communicate with one another at all times, but we've come a very long ways from the very beginning (some 8 yrs. ago).
No relationship is perfect by any means. But there's something to be said for two people who try will all they have to be committed to one another, and to understand what it means to put someone else's life and needs ahead of yours. Does that mean your life takes a back seat as a consequence? Well that certainly happens if the other is a bit more selfish, but giving yourself to one another gives a bit of unspoken reciprocation that just cannot be shared with yourself alone (no matter which hand you use :D).
Whatever the cause or means of adultery, to me the bottom line is to try to be as open and communicate with one another as much as possible. If your needs, or if her needs are to around with someone else, then just ing come out and say it. At least you're honest and man/woman enough to admit it. Otherwise, put those selfish desires in the backseat and try to learn what it means to commit yourself to someone else. I made a promise to my wife, myself, my family, her family, our friends, and (*gasp*) even to God if there ever be one out there. I feel pretty ing strongly about having just the minimal amount of integrity needed to keep such a promise. I suppose there are "sacrifices", so to speak, in doing this, but to me the rewards of commitment and sharing your life intimately with someone else are much much richer.
Disclaimer: I don't expect everyone to agree with me here. Indeed, there are many folks who feel they can attain equal happiness juggling multiple partners. And I'm also well aware of other cultures that do not believe in monogamy. All the power to you folks. It's just not, nor has it ever been my cup of tea, that's all. |
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| Renegade |
There is nothing inherently wrong or unnatural about polygamy.
From a moral standpoint, so long as all participants in the arrangement are aware of it and are comfortable with it, then it simply boils down to a matter of choice. Many cultures, including some in the western world (Mormons, for example) view polygamous marriages as acceptable and so long as there isn't any dishonesty involved, then I'm not sure how anyone could rightly say that polygamy is in any way immoral. From a biological standpoint, similarly, having the fertile male spreading his seed as far and wide as possible is more beneficial to the species (in terms of volume of progeny and overall genetic variation, that is) than monogamous relationships.
Of course, if you were to commit to an adulterous affair when you have already sworn yourself to monogamy with another human being, then such an action would be self-evidently immoral. The satisfaction of your own needs would be no justification in this case (you shouldn't be committing yourself to a monogamous relationship if you can't keep your primal - albeit, perhaps, natural - urges in check) but I don't think that the reason you gave in favour of monogamy, Lira (that you wouldn't be able to devote enough time to each of your lovers), is the main reason that such an action would be immoral. Sharing your time between different women wouldn't be immoral, again, so long as they assent to such an arrangement (it wouldn't be any more immoral or negligent than sharing your time between friends, say). The thing that makes breaking a monogamous arrangement "wrong" is the simple fact that you are emotionally betraying someone that you have, supposedly, made a commitment to. Even if you've only been going out with the girl for a fairly short amount of time - and you haven't had any specific talks about the exclusive nature of your relationship - it should be implied that, in our respective cultures, committing to a sexual relationship with such a girl (unless the prospect of polygamy has been explicitly discussed and assented to) means committing yourself, in this regard, completely to her. To do otherwise would be to betray where you have committed your responsibilities to her and to yourself: this is both an immoral and self-defeatingly inauthentic way to act.
And I'm not sure if this is relevant, but this is coming from someone who has cheated on two girlfriends during his life and who - although neither were particularly serious relationships that were likely to go anywhere - feels kinda ty about it looking back... :( |
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