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Stupid Design
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| Psy-T |
The theory of Stupid Design (SD) holds that certain features of the universe and of living things are so ridiculous that there must have been an unintelligent designer behind them, rather than an intelligent designer or an undirected process such as natural selection. SD is thus a scientific disagreement with the core claim of creationist theory that the apparent design of living systems actually makes ing sense.
Like, for instance, the platypus. What the damn hell is that thing supposed to be? I mean...just look at it. Is it a mammal? Its young feed on milk. Is it a marsupial? It lays eggs. And it's got a beak. Is it a bird? Yet it spends most of its time in water. Is it an amphibian then? It can't be, it has fur. But it doesn't have feet, it has flippers. Whoever made this stupid thing has got to be the most retarded creator ever. Only a complete tool would make something so dumb. The irreducible stupidity in all living things points to a short-sighted, half-assed botched job thanks to a dull-witted creator--a creator who almost certainly had no ing clue what he was doing and ed everything up when he tried to fix things. Why the hell do we even have to breathe? Why do men have nipples? The annoying sound mosquitos make when they explore your ear at 3am! If you look at all the irreducibly stupid evidence, you come to the simple conclusion that life could not possibly have evolved nor been the result of any sort of omnipotent intelligence. There are too many mistakes. There are too many errors and things going wrong. There are too many holes in all the other theories. Thus, there must have been a creator behind all this, and that creator, whoever it is, in all His glory, is a god damn idiot.
In a broader sense, Stupid Design is simply the science of admitting that gross negligence, extreme incompetence, and downright absurd planning and decision-making went into the Creation process. And our inability to explain why he made it the way he did explains why he must have been a bloody moron. We start by recognizing the patterns arranged by an unbelievably Stupid cause for no ing reason whatsoever (like the pinky toe). Detecting this bull is used in a number of scientific fields, including bibliology, ontological anarchy, and austistic analysys and the search for extraterrestrial stupidity (SETS). An inference that certain biological information may be the product of a feeble designer who probably has an IQ equivalent to that of a box of dirt can be tested or evaluated in the same manner as real scientists doing actual, real important research somewhere that is actually helping humanity.
Positive evidence of completely ing stupid design in living systems consists of the basic fact that none of the things that exist today make any ing sense, so why would an intelligent creator make them? Therefore, he must be a thick-headed, mouth-breathing, knuckle-dragging asswipe who obviously didn't think things through. It's quite possible that he just might be making this up as he goes along. For instance, there is no known law that can adequately explain why there is a fish in the Amazon river that can swim up your urine stream, into your urethra, and then jettison tiny barbs that dig into your penis that prevents it from being removOW OW OW OW OW OW OW it hurts just thinking about it while typing that out. Now, what purpose does this fish serve, other than to us up? Either the designer of this species is insane, sadistic, or completely bat crazy. Or maybe he didn't come to work that day and forgot that humans would object to the existence of this horror of horrors, I don't know. Other observable evidence for Stupid Design include such things as the fart, the tree stump, dung beetles, the giraffe, speed garage, snakes and flagellum. All of these things are apt challengers to the adequacy of natural or material causes to explain both the origin and diversity of life. I mean, RASPBERRIES, for the love of god! Come on!
Stupid Design is an intellectual movement that includes a scientific research program for investigating what idiot thought it would be a good idea to put the most painful part of a man's body dangling down between his legs where anyone could kick it. Hard. What genius came up with this brilliant plan?! Thankfully the same dolt didn't accidently put our brains outside our ing heads when he had one of his memory lapses. I don't know how we would be able to survive like that. What about the fig! Anyone who makes that ridiculous thing can't be very smart. Is the curator of our entire existence really this incredibly dense? And why the hell do we even have an organ that does nothing whatsoever, but can kill us in minutes if it ruptures? What obtuse fool would design an intelligent species like man, armed with a self-destructing time bomb? We have to conclude that either the designer is absolutely nuts, or he is just plain dumb. Dumb dumb dumb. All these things challenge naturalistic explanations of origins which currently drive science education and research. Kelp: what's up with that?
taken from here
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| St_Andrew |
Hahahaha! :haha:
Guess this should be tought along the flying spagetti monster in Kansas :p |
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| Chris Larkin |
:haha: :haha:
Yeah, it's by Ishkur, which makes it considerably less funny, but it's still pretty good. Maybe someone should send this to the Kansas Education Board? |
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| josh4 |
I like to think our universe is just the testing platform The Creator uses. Somewhere out there is a perfect universe worthy of his love. He just uses ours when he isnt sure something will work and wants to make sure so he doesn't screw up the good universe.
Kinda like the wiki sand box |
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| WingDing |
| quote: | Originally posted by Chris Larkin
Yeah, it's by Ishkur, which makes it considerably less funny, |
not really. |
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