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Give to receive or Give for pleasure? (pg. 5)
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| Moral Hazard |
| quote: | Originally posted by jennypie
Oh off. I'm sick of you imposing your "beliefs" onto MY thoughts and challenging what I say. That's what I said, that's what I meant. Yeah I WOULD do it if I felt no satisfaction in it, that's what generosity is to me. I'm sorry it's so hard for you to believe that selfless people exist...but they do.
Kudos on tyring to play Devil's Advocate though. :p |
I wasn't directly challenging you, however, your statement that giving makes you feel good lent itself to my questions. I do think they are valid... do we give gifts because it makes others feel good or because making other's feel good makes us feel good.... it's a valid question and one to which everyone can make their own judgement. |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by Moral Hazard
What I was getting at was that we like to give because it makes us feel good, if it didn't we probably wouldn't give gifts. Assuming I'm right that would mean we give gifts for our own satisfaction not to satisfy others. |
i think it depends on the situation. when i was with craig, i bought him a $150 dollar pair of nikes for no special occasion other than the fact that he was too broke and wearing the same shoes every day that were worn out, and they were making his back hurt (he did a lot of walking around campus every day). so i honestly wanted to get those for him because he needed them. i mean, that's all it was about...but i mean yea, it made me feel good to do that for him too, so i think it coule be a little bit of both and i wouldn't go as far as to say that i did that for purely selfish reasons. |
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| Silky Johnson |
| IGK, you can off too. |
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| Moral Hazard |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
as smart as you are moral, i do see a pattern in you always assuming (or trying to make people believe) that they are like you, fault-wise. basically, the way you are is how EVERYONE is...especially when we get into conversations about being honest or loyal or whatever...i've noticed that. i think maybe it makes you feel better to convince yourself that you're not alone in your character flaws?
i still love you though. :D |
You may be correct, however, I believe most people are simply unwilling or unable to admit (if only to themselves even) their own flaws. That said, my negative view of people in general could certainly be viewed as a flaw. |
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| igottaknow |
| quote: | Originally posted by jennypie
IGK, you can off too. |
i've been waiting for you to have your melt down. unfortunately i've got to go off to work now. :whip: |
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| Moral Hazard |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
so i think it coule be a little bit of both and i wouldn't go as far as to say that i did that for purely selfish reasons. |
I didn't go so far as to say such acts were purely selfish and I believe that in most cases it's a mix of both, however, our own satisfaction is certainly a motivator. Really, do you feel the same way when you give someone something they love as you do when they have no reaction at all.... probably not. |
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| dj tek |
| quote: | Originally posted by Moral Hazard
You may be correct, however, I believe most people are simply unwilling or unable to admit (if only to themselves even) their own flaws. That said, my negative view of people in general could certainly be viewed as a flaw. |
"to check fault in oneself is pure loveliness, you break the mirror that reminds you of your ugliness" - gza. |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by Moral Hazard
Really, do you feel the same way when you give someone something they love as you do when they have no reaction at all.... probably not. |
good point...you're right. i mean if i got someone a gift and they were like, "thanks" with no emotion at all, i'd probably be like, "hmm, alrighty then!" :sadgreen: |
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| benwaa |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
good point...you're right. i mean if i got someone a gift and they were like, "thanks" with no emotion at all, i'd probably be like, "hmm, alrighty then!" :sadgreen: |
ok, i have to agree that i love to give and would also be a little bit confused? if the receiver of the gift had no reaction at all.
time for an example as to why i styarted the thread.
Every week i buy the girl i love flowers, chocolates, make up stuff basically whatever she enjoys, she NEVER asks for these things and is always very pleased to receive these things which makes me happy i got the right thing. I never expect anything back in return and don't even think about it.
This weekend we were away together and I bought gifts for her, I went to buy myself a hat for a MEASLY £3.50 and she wanted one too, feeling she HAD to buy me something she offered to pay for both hats. Ok i thought, don't argue that's a nice gesture, we got to the till and she asked for a £1 contribution, so i then thought to myself "it can't be a present if I have to pay towards it myself? but thanks for the thought anyway" and was still just as happy.
The next day she goes out shopping and returns with lots of stuff for herself and a bar of candy for me. I was really ahppy to get this as it showed thought for me. she'd bought the same for herself and gave me a small piece.
We get home and the next day I'm going home to my own place to stay for the night as its my turn to have my son stay over, I pack up my stuff and ask "Babe, where's the candy you bought me?" she tells me where it is and I pack it away. Just before I leave she asks "Are you taking all that home with you?" to which i say "YES".
Promptly she goes into a mood with a face that's been slapped by a kipper, so i ask "What's wrong?" she asks me to share the candy bar(remember it's only small) with her and i say "do you mind if i eat it myself?" she then says to me "I give you Half of mine! you should share it!!"
I'm absolutely dumbstruck at her reaction, I can't believe that the one gift she's bought me in god knows how long she wants half of after I buy her things all, and I MEAN ALL, the time.
Am I being a dick thinking she's selfish? |
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| Danny Ocean |
you're a dick because you feel the need to start new threads on the same topics.
shes selfish, and i would've given her the whole candy bar she got me when she asked for half to prove a point. |
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| Silky Johnson |
| Hahaha...greedy bitch. |
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