|
Girls with HOT voices and DISGUSTING faces thread
|
View this Thread in Original format
| Akridrot |
Why must life constantly tease and disappoint?
Today we went to my aunt's for Thanksgiving. My aunt's husband (we'll call him H) revealed to me today that he had a daughter with another woman before he met my aunt. All the family older than my generation knew this, but never really spoke about it.
His daughter is doing BIG things. She is intelligent and successful, and he's mighty proud of her. H told me to go on-line to check for her, but he didn't know where to go. So he calls her to ask.
After a few sentences exchanged between them, he puts the phone to my ear.  
In all honesty, her voice alone excited me. So she gives the directions and we get to the site, all is good. I ask "How much older than me is she? I've never seen her before?" At this point I'm desperate to see this beauty. He only confirms that she's much older than me, but offers to show me her pics. I am happy.
After he comes back with his book, he flips through the pages looking for her pic. I am on the edge of my seat, and I want to see this hot babe. He can't find it. He flips front to back, looking for it. Damn, I'm disappointed. "Hold on, I know where her picture is," he says.
Now I can't wait, he's in the back rummaging through his stuff, looking for me. I imagine how beautiful and able she will look. I get hard, I fantasize about meeting her on false pretenses (something about relatives) and ing her. I can't help myself.
He walks toward me with the picture and I start smiling, I can't wait. He shows me. She has a ING MUSTACHE. :whip: :whip: :whip:
RAAAAAAAAAWWWWWWWWWWR!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!:whip: :whip: :whip: :mad: :mad:
GODDAMN!!!!!!!!! :mad: :mad: :mad:
STUPID UGLY BITCH!!!!!!!
Then he was grinning at me and I didn't want to hurt his feelings, so I said "looks familiar," already uninterested in whatever bull he had to tell me about that.
Seriously, I got so hyped up by myself that I expected her to be drop dead gorgeous. I was dead wrong. :(
Thank science I still have a hot cousin who's always asking for me. If I play my cards right I'll be all up in her ass by next year. But it'll take some work, her mother is about to die (she'll be all sad and depressed, you know how it is). |
|
|
| Halcyon+On+On |
haha what?
Is this a serious thread? |
|
|
| Orbital32 |
| wanting to hook up with your uncle's daughter (which technically makes you cousins) uhmmmm okkkkay. |
|
|
| Lilith |
| I don't care if it is or isn't, I'm still rofl about the cousin thing |
|
|
| Akridrot |
| quote: | Originally posted by Orbital32
wanting to hook up with your uncle's daughter (which technically makes you cousins) uhmmmm okkkkay. |
Since when were the husbands of people's aunts their uncles? I think you got confused. My aunt's huband isn't my uncle, he's my "aunt's HUSBAND". Therefore, his daughter by another woman is not related to me AT ALL.
But what does it matter, I want to my real cousin anyway. And she's my first cousin. I don't give a rat's ass, I'd her raw right this instant if given the chance.
Also, @ Halcyon: This happened. As you can see, no theme songs and funny images at the bottom of this post. :( Even I don't know what to say about all this.
edit: I'm going to bed. I'll answer any questions or comments tommorrow. |
|
|
| Nrg2Nfinit |
dude i know what you mean.. my cousins are hot as fcuck.. they are california beach babes.. but still i wont get an errection because i know their my cousins.
there are more fish in the sea.
Plus who cares if she has a moustaceh... i have a unibrow.. just get rid of that .. would she be hot without a moustache? |
|
|
| Orbital32 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Akridrot
Since when were the husbands of people's aunts their uncles? I think you got confused. My aunt's huband isn't my uncle, he's my "aunt's HUSBAND". Therefore, his daughter by another woman is not related to me AT ALL.
But what does it matter, I want to my real cousin anyway. And she's my first cousin. I don't give a rat's ass, I'd her raw right this instant if given the chance.
Also, @ Halcyon: This happened. As you can see, no theme songs and funny images at the bottom of this post. :( Even I don't know what to say about all this.
edit: I'm going to bed. I'll answer any questions or comments tommorrow. |
sorry, i forgot that incest doesn't apply in Dixieland. |
|
|
| jonSun |
| You really got the hots for your uncle. :wtf: |
|
|
| Arbiter |
Yeah, I'm gonna just go ahead and assume this was supposed to be a joke. Good one.  |
|
|
| Sushipunk |
| quote: | Originally posted by Akridrot
Since when were the husbands of people's aunts their uncles? I think you got confused. My aunt's huband isn't my uncle, he's my "aunt's HUSBAND". Therefore, his daughter by another woman is not related to me AT ALL.
But what does it matter, I want to my real cousin anyway. And she's my first cousin. I don't give a rat's ass, I'd her raw right this instant if given the chance.
Also, @ Halcyon: This happened. As you can see, no theme songs and funny images at the bottom of this post. :( Even I don't know what to say about all this.
edit: I'm going to bed. I'll answer any questions or comments tommorrow. |
She's family by marriage. Sorry dude, you're a weirdo. On the upside, now you can finally fulfill your life-long dream of going on Jerry Springer! :gsmile: |
|
|
| take5 |
| ask her for a phone sex |
|
|
| Sushipunk |
| quote: | Originally posted by take5
ask her for a phone sex |
Just one? |
|
|
|
|
