|
Bored ? Joke thread ! (make it work safe)
|
View this Thread in Original format
| DJ Charlie |
A little boy wanted $100 very badly and prayed for weeks, but nothing happened. Then he decided to write God a letter requesting the $100.
When the postal authorities received the letter addressed to God, Canada, they decided to send it to the Prime Minister. Steven Harper was so amused that he instructed his secretary to send the little boy a $5 bill. Harper thought this would appear to be a lot of money to a little boy.
The little boy was delighted with the $5 bill and sat down to write a thank-you note to God, which read:
"Dear God: Thank you very much for sending the money, however, I noticed that for some reason you sent it through Ottawa, and those s deducted $95 in taxes." |
|
|
| DJ Charlie |
Joke for arabs:
Bill Gates decides to organize an enormous session of recruitment for a
new chairman for Microsoft Europe. The 5000 candidates are all assembled
in a large room. One of the candidates is Fadi Khoury, a Lebanese guy.
Bill Gates thanks all the candidates for coming and asks that all those who do not
know JAVA program language rise and leave. 2000 people rise and leave the room.
Fadi Khoury says to himself
- 'I do not know this language but what have I got to lose if I stay? I'll give it a try'.
Bill Gates asks all the candidates that those who have never had experience of team management of more than 100 people rise and leave. 2000 people rise and leave the room. Fadi Khoury says to himself
- 'I have never managed anybody but myself but what have I got to lose if I stay? What can happen to me'? So he stays.
Then Bill Gates asks all the candidates who do not have excellent management diplomas to rise and leave. 500 people rise and leave the room.
Fadi Khoury says to himself
- 'I left school at 15 but what have I got to lose if I stay? So he stays in the room.
Lastly, Bill Gates asks all of the candidates who do not speak the Serbo-Croat language to rise and leave. 498 people rise and leave the room. Fadi Khoury says himself
- 'I do not speak Serbo-Croat but what the 'Hell! - Have I got anything to lose?'
So he stays in the room.
He finds himself alone with one other candidate - everyone else has gone.
Bill Gates joins them and says: 'Apparently you are the only two candidates who speak Serbo-Croatian, so I'd now like to hear you both have a little conversation in that language!
Calmly Fadi turns to the other candidate and says to him:
'Keifak ya eir'...
Translation : What's up dick ?
The other candidate answers: 'Kol khara ya manyouk'
Translation : Eat you fag |
|
|
| Wisnia |
Check out this video:
I-Rack |
|
|
| John_H2O |
wow this video is soooo funny...
And now ''the iRan'' :haha: :haha: :haha: :haha: :haha: |
|
|
| Dj Nacht |
A blind man walks into a restaurant and sits down. The waiter, who is also the owner, walks up to the blind man and hands him a menu.
"I'm sorry, sir, but I am blind and can't read the menu. Just bring me a dirty fork from a previous customer. I'll smell it and order from there."-said the blind man.
A little confused, the owner walks over to the dirty dish pile and picks up a greasy fork. He returns to the blind man's table and hands it to him. The blind man puts the fork to his nose and takes in a deep breath. "Ah, yes, that's what I'll have -- meatloaf and mashed potatoes."
Unbelievable, the owner thinks
as he walks towards the kitchen. The cook happens to be the owner's wife. He tells her what had just happened. The blind man eats his meal and leaves.
Several days later, the blind man returns and the owner mistakenly brings him a menu again. "Sir, remember me? I'm the blind man." -said the blind man.
"I'm sorry, I didn't recognize you. I'll go get you a dirty fork."-apologizes the owner. He then retrieves a dirty fork and brings it to the blind man.
After another deep breath, the blind man says, "That smells great. I'll take the macaroni and cheese with broccoli."
Walking away in disbelief, the owner thinks the blind man is screwing around with him and tells his wife that the next time the blind man comes in he's going to test him.
The blind man eats and leaves.
He returns the following week, but this time the owner sees him coming and runs to the kitchen. He tells his wife, "Mary, rub this fork on your panties before I take it to the blind man."
Mary complies and hands her husband the fork. As the blind man walks in and sits down, the owner is ready and waiting.
"Good afternoon, sir, this time I remembered you and I already have the fork ready for you."- greeted he.
The blind man puts the fork to his nose, takes a deep whiff, and says, "Hey I didn't know that Mary worked here..." |
|
|
| oldschool420 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Wisnia
Check out this video:
I-Rack |
bahahahahahahah! that's pure gold. |
|
|
| ImmyJ |
Q: What's green and smells like pork?
A: Kermit's fingers.
Paix. |
|
|
| Omega_M |
Q. what is funnier than AIDS ?
A. this thread. :clown: |
|
|
| Allied Nations |
Cat walks into a bar
cat says "Hey man, can i get some catnip"
bartender "wtf you can't talk. you're a cat"
cat: ohh. |
|
|
| Alex |
| quote: | Originally posted by Allied Nations
Cat walks into a bar
cat says "Hey man, can i get some catnip"
bartender "wtf you can't talk. you're a cat"
cat: ohh. |
Oh bravo |
|
|
| Paulr |
:conf: :conf:
you tired Greg ? |
|
|
|
|
