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A quick joke for the TA's
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djjoshuaallen
I thought this was funny, I will keep it in mind once i get older and may need to use it:D

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.

Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like
it, I just want you to hold me."

I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!"

So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...

"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."

She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"

Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.

The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit."

We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."

Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"

I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman."

And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that bitch knows I'm smarter than her.
Miss Julia
old joke :p
Direct
Yes, I really have the time and patience to ing read all of that.
bas
quote:
Originally posted by Direct
Yes, I really have the time and patience to ing read all of that.

Reading at a 6th grade level must be tough :(
kingofthenight
Old joke but a classic one!!!

:toothless
djjoshuaallen
quote:
Originally posted by Direct
Yes, I really have the time and patience to ing read all of that.



why are you surfing TA if you have no time or patience to read?
spanglo
The title said a "quick" joke... serious false advertising.
nchs09
why does a chiken coup have 2 doors?


because if it had 4, it would be a sedan


BUDUM DUM DUM .... ill be here all day.
donnybrasco
My favorite all-time "quick" women-abuse joke;


"What do you tell a woman with two black eyes?







....nothing! You already told her twice!"


:tongue3
hadi burpee
quote:
Originally posted by spanglo
The title said a "quick" joke... serious false advertising.
how slow do you read? it takes like 1:30 to 2 minutes to read.

starboy
lol more!
the_jerk
quote:
Originally posted by spanglo
The title said a "quick" joke... serious false advertising.


Wow. People will complain about anything on these boards. I never heard the joke.... and liked it! :D
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