| Benjamin DuBose |
> Subject: Fw: When Girls Don't Put Out!!!
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> This was written by a guy ... it's pretty damn smart.
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> Girls -- Please have a sense of humor!
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> I never quite figured out why the sexual urge of men and women differ
> so much. And I never have figured out the whole Venus and Mars thing.
> I have never figured out why men think with their head and women with
> their heart.
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> FOR EXAMPLE:
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> One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed.
> Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, 'I don't
> feel like it, I just want you to hold me.'
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> I said, 'WHAT??!! What was that? !'
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> So she says the words that every boyfriend on the planet dreads to
> hear...
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> 'You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough
> for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man.'
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> She responded to my puzzled look by saying, 'Can't you just love me
> for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?'
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> Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep.
>
> The very next day I opted to take the day off of work to spend time
> with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big,
> big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried
> on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which
> one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new
> shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, 'Lets get a pair for
> each outfit.'
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> We went on to the jewelry department where she picked out a pair of
> diamond earrings. Let me tell you... she was so excited. She must have
> thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she
> was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she
> doesn't even know how to play tennis.
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> I think I threw her for a loop when I said, 'That's fine, honey.' She
> was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement.
> Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally said, 'I think this is
> all
> dear, let's go to the cashier.'
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> I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, 'No honey, I don't
> feel like it.'
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> Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled,
> 'WHAT?'
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> I then said, 'Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for a while.
> You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for
> me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman.'
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> And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I
> added, 'Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things
> I buy you?'
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> Apparently I'm not having sex tonight either....but at least that
> bitch knows I'm smarter than her. |
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