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Funny quotes
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| dj_souvlaki |
my buddy kevin was a very tallented writer. he unfortunantly passed away last year from cancer.
but i thought i would share with you some of his quotes. they are a great laugh. check out his blog to. it pretty much has a full emotional story of his fight with cancer.
http://tazvalentine.spaces.live.com/default.aspx
theres were called iquotes. he hated anything to do with apple and ipods and anything that had an i infront of it liike iphone etc...
July 03
The Official iQuotes Listing
This is the official collection of Taz Valentine's Quotes. In case you don't know what the iQuotes are, it is a collection of personal quotes that I have come up with on my own.........well my own batch of personal STUPID quotes that is. These are usually completely stupid and random, if you felt they didn't make any sense, GOOD, if you feel they are offensive, GOOD, if you disagree with them, SCREW YOU, and if you felt they were witty and informative, then congratulations because you are officially the tool of the day.
April 1: "I did something silly today. I made a wish. Silly me right?"
March 28: "You know you're in denile when you buy low fat butter."
2005
November 14: "If people could fly, they'd still take an airplane because they are in lazy."
October 26: "I am not misguided, I am simply indecisive."
October 19: "You know your life is a practical joke when you actually slip and fall on a banana peel."
October 9th: "Happy Birthday you sorry bastard. Now clean up this ing mess!"
October 3: "Throw a rock through my window on a Saturday afternoon, and I'll get pretty upset. Throw a rock through my window on a Monday morning, and I'll bomb your house."
September 24: "He HAS to be gay! I mean, why else would he have a banana, two apples and a cinnamon bun to go with his fruit salad?"
September 5: "I don't like you because you eat your fruits horizontally."
September 2: "Beauty might be on the inside, but people aren't exactly transparent."
August 29: "Don't make me backhand you with a buttered pancake Aunt Jemima!"
August 28: "Hey little Billy it seems you are dying of cancer.................OH, it seems I have recieved some good news, I just saved a bunch of money by switching to Geico."
August 24 (used against Jay): "I 0wn3d you so hard that all your assets turned to liabilities."
August 23: Imagine this as a Jeopardy question: "If you want to start it, you'll end up eating it too."
August 18: "When I die, I'll make one hell of a corpse."
August 9: "Don't trust. Seems like the best course of action."
August 9: "When they invent a remote control that that comes to you on its own, or irradicate the need for a remote at all, all of mankind will be doomed."
August 8: "There just seems to be nothing that can compare to the toilet you have at home."
July 27: "In Vietnam, the only one that finds the sign that says 'Phuc' funny, is me."
July 21: "It was worth trading in serveral hundred brains cells for a taste of carefree."
July 19: "Just keep walking, Southeast, and when you turn into molten lava, you'll know you're in Vietnam."
July 18: "Choosing between religion and politics is like playing volleyball with a pineapple."
July 05: "Your friends, ALL OF THEM, are losers. And now you have to live knowing that."
July 03: "Hello, my name is Abraham Lincoln."
June 29: "Kill that bitch!"
June 27: "Canadians are trying to make cigarette smoking completely illegal because it's bad for your health. Meanwhile in Iraq........"
June 25 (actually used!):
"White Guy: Hey China-man, why don't you show me some kung-fu moves? hiya!
Me: Hey white man, why don't you show me how you CAN'T dance?"
***Viewer discretion is advised***
June 22: "Hey Mr. Racist person. What's the matter, the other brands of tasted funny?"
***Viewer discretion is advised***
June 21: "If I were an apple, you would be the worm eating at the dirty brown hole."
June 18: "Pants are good sometimes, even when you're wet"
June 16: "A hamburger is a food item, not a religion."
June 15: "You best get to steppin' pon mah buddist palm biotch!"
June 13: "Let's see how far the Energizer Bunny goes after I stick a fork in his battery pack!"
June 10: "You cannot buy love, but you can definately pay for it"
June 06: "If you trip and fall, and pick yourself up again, then you were officially 0wn3d by gravity." |
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| soupastah |
| quote: | Originally posted by dj_souvlaki
July 21: "It was worth trading in serveral hundred brain cells for a taste of carefree."
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:)
wemf |
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| Djsketchbag |
| quote: | Originally posted by soupastah
:)
wemf |
Your really exited eh ? |
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| dj_souvlaki |
| quote: | Originally posted by Djsketchbag
Your really exited eh ? |
hahah im pretty stoked too. i've never been. |
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| cenik |
| quote: | Originally posted by dj_souvlaki
June 06: "If you trip and fall, and pick yourself up again, then you were officially 0wn3d by gravity." |
:haha: |
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