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Funny Forward
|
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| dj_mdma |
Here's a funny forward I got from a friend.
>Hello,
>My name is Basmati Kasaar. I am suffering from rare and deadly
>diseases:,poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity, fear of
>being
>kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not
>forwarding
>about 50 billion ing chain letters sent to me by people who
>actually
>believe that if you send them on, then that poor 6 year old girl
>in
>Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise
>enough money
> >> >to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to
>the
> >> >travelling freak show.
> >> >
> >> >Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you,
>and
> >everyone
> >> >you send "his" email to, $1000? How stupid are you?
> >> >
> >> >Ooooh, lookyhere!
> >> >If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by
> >>every
> >> >Playboy model in the magazine! What a bunch of bull. So
> >>basically,
> >> >this message is a big YOU to all the people out there who
> >>have
> >> >nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail
>forwards.
> >>Maybe
> >the
> >> >evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartment and
> >>sodomize me
> >> >in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by
> >>Jesus in 5
> >> >A.D. and was brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the
> >>Mayflower
> >> >and if it makes it to the year 2000, it'll be in the Guinness
> >>Book of
> >> >World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant
>stupidity.
> >>
> >> >them.
> >> >
> >> >If you're going to forward something, at least send me
>something
> >> >mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your
> >>closest
> >> >friends and an amazing wretched excuse for a human being will
> >> >somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards
> >>about 90
> >> >times. I don't ing care. Show a little intelligence and
> >>think about
> >> >what you're actually contributing to by sending out forwards.
> >>Chances are
> >> >it's your own unpopularity.
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >THE FOUR BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:
> >> >
> >> >----------------- Chain Letter Type 1:---------------------
> >> >(Scroll down)
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >Make a wish!!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >No, really, go on and make one!!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!! Wish something
> >>else!!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >Is your finger getting tired yet?
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >STOP!!!!
> >> >
> >> >Wasn't that fun? :)
> >> >
> >> >Hope you made a great wish :)
> >> >
> >> >Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of
>all,
> >>if you
> >> >don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will
>be
> >>raped
> >by
> >> >a mad goat and thrown off a high building into a pile of .
> >> >
> >> >It's true! Because, THIS letter isn't like all of those fake
> >>ones, THIS
> >> >one is TRUE!! Really!!! REALLY!!!! I SWEAR!!! IT's TRUE!!!!
> >> >
> >> >Here's how it goes:
> >> >Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you for
> >> >sending them a stupid chain letter.
> >> >Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed off at you
>for
> >> >sending them a stupid chain letter.
> >> >Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at you
> >>for
> >> >sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot on your
> >>life.
> >> >
> >> >Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at
>you
> >> >for sending them a stupid chain letter and will firebomb your
> >> >house. Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >------------------------Chain Letter Type 2
> >> >
> >> >Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. You see, there is
>a
> >starving
> >> >little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who has no arms,
> >> >no legs, no parents, and no goats. This little boy's life could
> >>be
> >saved,
> >> >because for every time you pass this on, a dollar will be
>donated
> >>to the
> >> >Little Starving Legless Armless Goatless Boy from
> >> >Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund. Oh, and remember, we have
> >>absolutely no way
> >> >of counting the emails sent and this is all a complete load of
> >>bull.
> >> >So go on, reach out. Send this to 5 people in the next 47
> >>seconds. Oh,
> >and
> >> >a reminder - if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people,
>you
> >>will die
> >> >instantly. Thanks again!!
> >> >
> >> >--------------------------------Chain Letter Type 3
> >> >
> >> >Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1897.
> >>This
> >> >is absolutely incredible because there was no email then and
> >>probably not
> >> >as many sad pricks with nothing better to do.
> >> >So this is how it works: Pass this on to 15,067 people in the
> >>next
> >> >7 minutes or something horrible will happen to you like:
> >> >
> >> >*Bizarre Horror Story #1 Miranda Pinsley was walking home from
> >> >school on Saturday. She had recently recieved this letter and
> >>ignored it.
> >> >She then tripped in a crack in the sidewalk, fell into the
> >> >sewer, was gushed down a drainpipe in a flood of poop, and went
> >> >flying out over a waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty, she
> >>died.
> >> >ThisCould Happen To You!!!
> >> >
> >> >*Bizarre Horror Story #2 Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a
> >>chain
> >> >letter in his mail and ignored it. Later that day, he was hit
>by
> >>a car
> >and
> >> >so was his boyfriend (hey, some people swing that way)
> >> >They both died and went to hell and were cursed to eat adorable
> >> >kittens every day for eternity. This Could Happen To You Too!!!
> >> >Remember, you could end up just like Pinsley and Bip. Just send
> >> >this letter to all of your loser friends, and everything will
>be
> >>okay.
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >----------------------Chain Letter Type 4:
> >> >
> >> >As if you care, here is a poem that I wrote. Send it to every
>one
> >> >of your friends.
> >> >
> >> >Friends
> >> >A friend is someone who is always at your side,
> >> >A friend is someone who likes you even though you stink of
>,
> >> >and your breath smells like you've been eating catfood,
> >> >A friend is someone who likes you even though you're as ugly as
>a
> >> > hat full of s,
> >> >A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled
> >> > yourself,
> >> >A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry
> >> > about your sad, sad life,
> >> >A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really
> >> > think you should be raped by mad chimpanzees, then thrown to
> >>vicious
> >> >dogs,
> >> >A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and then
>gets
> >> > the check and leaves and doesn't speak much English... no,
>Sorry
> >> >that's the cleaning lady,
> >> >A friend is not someone who sends you chain letters because he
> >> > wants his wish of being rich to come true.
> >> >
> >> >Now pass this on! If you don't, you'll never have sex ever
>again,
> >>or ever
> >> >for you virgins....
> >> >
> >> >------------------------------------------------------
> >> >The point being?If you get some chain letter that's threatening
> >>to leave
> >> >you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.
>If
> >>it's
> >> >funny, send it on.
> >> >
> >> >Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper
>in
> >> >Botswana with no teeth, who's been tied to a dead elephant for
>27
> >> >years, whose only saviour is the 5 cents per letter he'll
>receive
> >>if you
> >> >forward this mail, otherwise you'll end up like Miranda. Right?
> >> >
> >> >Now forward this to everyone you know otherwise you'll have to
> >>look at me
> >> >naked!
> >> >
> >> >Remember: "There are no stupid questions, just stupid
> >> >people.
> >> >
LOLOLOLOL :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :eyespop: :eyespop: |
|
|
| IronDragon |
| quote: | Originally posted by dj_mdma
Here's a funny forward I got from a friend.
>Hello,
>My name is Basmati Kasaar. I am suffering from rare and deadly
>diseases:,poor scores on final exams, extreme virginity, fear of
>being
>kidnapped and executed by anal electrocution, and guilt for not
>forwarding
>about 50 billion ing chain letters sent to me by people who
>actually
>believe that if you send them on, then that poor 6 year old girl
>in
>Arkansas with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise
>enough money
> >> >to have it removed before her redneck parents sell her off to
>the
> >> >travelling freak show.
> >> >
> >> >Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you,
>and
> >everyone
> >> >you send "his" email to, $1000? How stupid are you?
> >> >
> >> >Ooooh, lookyhere!
> >> >If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by
> >>every
> >> >Playboy model in the magazine! What a bunch of bull. So
> >>basically,
> >> >this message is a big YOU to all the people out there who
> >>have
> >> >nothing better to do than to send me stupid chain mail
>forwards.
> >>Maybe
> >the
> >> >evil chain letter leprechauns will come into my apartment and
> >>sodomize me
> >> >in my sleep for not continuing the chain which was started by
> >>Jesus in 5
> >> >A.D. and was brought to this country by midget pilgrims on the
> >>Mayflower
> >> >and if it makes it to the year 2000, it'll be in the Guinness
> >>Book of
> >> >World Records for longest continuous streak of blatant
>stupidity.
> >>
> >> >them.
> >> >
> >> >If you're going to forward something, at least send me
>something
> >> >mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 50 of your
> >>closest
> >> >friends and an amazing wretched excuse for a human being will
> >> >somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being" forwards
> >>about 90
> >> >times. I don't ing care. Show a little intelligence and
> >>think about
> >> >what you're actually contributing to by sending out forwards.
> >>Chances are
> >> >it's your own unpopularity.
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >THE FOUR BASIC TYPES OF CHAIN LETTERS:
> >> >
> >> >----------------- Chain Letter Type 1:---------------------
> >> >(Scroll down)
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >Make a wish!!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >No, really, go on and make one!!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >Oh please, they'll never go out with you!!! Wish something
> >>else!!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >Is your finger getting tired yet?
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >STOP!!!!
> >> >
> >> >Wasn't that fun? :)
> >> >
> >> >Hope you made a great wish :)
> >> >
> >> >Now, to make you feel guilty, here's what I'll do. First of
>all,
> >>if you
> >> >don't send this to 5096 people in the next 5 seconds, you will
>be
> >>raped
> >by
> >> >a mad goat and thrown off a high building into a pile of .
> >> >
> >> >It's true! Because, THIS letter isn't like all of those fake
> >>ones, THIS
> >> >one is TRUE!! Really!!! REALLY!!!! I SWEAR!!! IT's TRUE!!!!
> >> >
> >> >Here's how it goes:
> >> >Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you for
> >> >sending them a stupid chain letter.
> >> >Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed off at you
>for
> >> >sending them a stupid chain letter.
> >> >Send this to 5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at you
> >>for
> >> >sending them a stupid chain letter, and may form a plot on your
> >>life.
> >> >
> >> >Send this to 10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at
>you
> >> >for sending them a stupid chain letter and will firebomb your
> >> >house. Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!!
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >------------------------Chain Letter Type 2
> >> >
> >> >Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. You see, there is
>a
> >starving
> >> >little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who has no arms,
> >> >no legs, no parents, and no goats. This little boy's life could
> >>be
> >saved,
> >> >because for every time you pass this on, a dollar will be
>donated
> >>to the
> >> >Little Starving Legless Armless Goatless Boy from
> >> >Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund. Oh, and remember, we have
> >>absolutely no way
> >> >of counting the emails sent and this is all a complete load of
> >>bull.
> >> >So go on, reach out. Send this to 5 people in the next 47
> >>seconds. Oh,
> >and
> >> >a reminder - if you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people,
>you
> >>will die
> >> >instantly. Thanks again!!
> >> >
> >> >--------------------------------Chain Letter Type 3
> >> >
> >> >Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1897.
> >>This
> >> >is absolutely incredible because there was no email then and
> >>probably not
> >> >as many sad pricks with nothing better to do.
> >> >So this is how it works: Pass this on to 15,067 people in the
> >>next
> >> >7 minutes or something horrible will happen to you like:
> >> >
> >> >*Bizarre Horror Story #1 Miranda Pinsley was walking home from
> >> >school on Saturday. She had recently recieved this letter and
> >>ignored it.
> >> >She then tripped in a crack in the sidewalk, fell into the
> >> >sewer, was gushed down a drainpipe in a flood of poop, and went
> >> >flying out over a waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty, she
> >>died.
> >> >ThisCould Happen To You!!!
> >> >
> >> >*Bizarre Horror Story #2 Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a
> >>chain
> >> >letter in his mail and ignored it. Later that day, he was hit
>by
> >>a car
> >and
> >> >so was his boyfriend (hey, some people swing that way)
> >> >They both died and went to hell and were cursed to eat adorable
> >> >kittens every day for eternity. This Could Happen To You Too!!!
> >> >Remember, you could end up just like Pinsley and Bip. Just send
> >> >this letter to all of your loser friends, and everything will
>be
> >>okay.
> >> >
> >> >
> >> >----------------------Chain Letter Type 4:
> >> >
> >> >As if you care, here is a poem that I wrote. Send it to every
>one
> >> >of your friends.
> >> >
> >> >Friends
> >> >A friend is someone who is always at your side,
> >> >A friend is someone who likes you even though you stink of
>,
> >> >and your breath smells like you've been eating catfood,
> >> >A friend is someone who likes you even though you're as ugly as
>a
> >> > hat full of s,
> >> >A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled
> >> > yourself,
> >> >A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry
> >> > about your sad, sad life,
> >> >A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really
> >> > think you should be raped by mad chimpanzees, then thrown to
> >>vicious
> >> >dogs,
> >> >A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet, vacuums and then
>gets
> >> > the check and leaves and doesn't speak much English... no,
>Sorry
> >> >that's the cleaning lady,
> >> >A friend is not someone who sends you chain letters because he
> >> > wants his wish of being rich to come true.
> >> >
> >> >Now pass this on! If you don't, you'll never have sex ever
>again,
> >>or ever
> >> >for you virgins....
> >> >
> >> >------------------------------------------------------
> >> >The point being?If you get some chain letter that's threatening
> >>to leave
> >> >you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it.
>If
> >>it's
> >> >funny, send it on.
> >> >
> >> >Don't piss people off by making them feel guilty about a leper
>in
> >> >Botswana with no teeth, who's been tied to a dead elephant for
>27
> >> >years, whose only saviour is the 5 cents per letter he'll
>receive
> >>if you
> >> >forward this mail, otherwise you'll end up like Miranda. Right?
> >> >
> >> >Now forward this to everyone you know otherwise you'll have to
> >>look at me
> >> >naked!
> >> >
> >> >Remember: "There are no stupid questions, just stupid
> >> >people.
> >> >
LOLOLOLOL :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :eyespop: :eyespop: |
I'm familiar with the first kind and I think it's pretty funny. The next three are just as funny. |
|
|
| crash@hun |
| I hate those annoying chain letters''' Guess i'm not the only one who never bothers forwarding them. Good to know;) |
|
|
| BigDil |
| I even have a second email adress for this purpose :) When I tell people my email, I ususally give them the other one and tell them to use it in case they want to send me bull :D I eventually check this adress, and delete the incoming mails leaving them unread. Heh ;) |
|
|
| Raccoon |
| LOL, this is one funny forward. Usually I never read em or send em either, but this time I'm gonna send it to all those suckers and get em back for sending my chain letter crap. Mwahahaha! :haha: |
|
|
| thewarpbrothers |
| this guy is majorly pissed off :whip: |
|
|
| mr. poopyhead |
HAHAAH.. that's some funny ... soo true....
whatever... people got good intentions.... but i mean, do they HONESTLY think that some heartless corporation is going to donate money to someone with cancer?? why not donate to the cancer society and help EVERYONE out.... its just common sense...
the stupidest ones go something like this:
"hotmail is trying to clean up its accounts. to keep your account, you must forward this email to at least 10 people. if you don't, you will be deleted from hotmail. SEND THIS TO EVERYONE ON YOUR LIST!!!!!"
yeah... like hotmail admins type in all caps... idiots...
you know what else is annoying? those icq porno messages...
"do you like seeing grannies raped by animals?? if you do, go to this link... blah blah blah... " |
|
|
| Lovely |
| hahaha, I hate chain letters to! But uh I've got two words for this guy "anger management " - Lovely |
|
|
| Trancefella |
| word up! :p :haha: |
|
|
| D_G |
hahaha
i bet there is a small handful of ppl who believe they work too!! |
|
|
| dj dave b |
ahahaha, its so true!!
hey IronDragon how come you quoted the entire post when you were posting just below it ? :wtf: |
|
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