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Show Me Your Xmas Tree
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| elFreak |
who has them up? I have already had mine up since nov 1st since my gf is a little too keen on Christmas.
I have a ty fake tree with Canadiens stuff all over it, red,white, and blue lights.
Post em up guys...Krypton you can post your bedroom.
i'll post pics in a bit. |
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| Silky Johnson |
| I don't have one. I thought about getting a little one though. |
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| gehzumteufel |
| I can't. I would get banned for it. It isn't big though, so doubt anyone wants to see. |
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| elFreak |
| post a silhouette then. |
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| Sushipunk |
I haven't had a Christmas tree since I lived at home. 11 years now? :stongue:
Not really a fan of Christmas at all. |
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| elFreak |
you guys ing suck..i try to be festive and not an asshat for 5 seconds and this is what i get.:mad:
BIG BAG OF DICKS:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: |
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| Silky Johnson |
| Man, if I had a Christmas tree I'd gladly take a pic and share it. So stfu. :mad: |
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| elFreak |
My gf has the camera.
ing fail all around.
'Twas the night before Christmas, and God it was neat
The kids were both gone, and my wife was in heat
The doors were all bolted, and the phone off the hook,
It was time for some nooky, by hook or by crook.
Momma in her teddy, and I in the nude,
Had just hit the bedroom, and reached for the lube
When out on the lawn, there arose such a cry,
That I lost my boner, and poor momma went dry.
Up to the window I sprang like an elf,
Tore back the shade while she played with herself.
The moon on the crest of the snowman we'd built,
Showed a broom up his ass, clean up to the hilt.
When what to my wondering eyes should appear,
But a rusty old sleigh and eight mangy reindeer.
With a fat little driver, half out of his sled,
A sock in his ear, and a bra on his head.
Sure as I'm speaking, he was as high as a kite.
And he yelled to his team, but it didn't sound right.
Whoa head, whoa , whoa Stupid, whoa Putz,
Either slow down this rig or I'll cut off your nuts.
Look out for the lamp post, and don't hit the tree,
Quit shaking the sleigh, 'cause I gotta go pee.
They cleared the old lamp post, the tree got a rub,
Just as Santa leaned out and threw up on my shrub.
And then from the roof we heard such a clatter,
As each little reindeer now emptied his bladder.
I was donning my jacket to cover my ass,
When down the chimney Santa came with a crash.
His suit was all smelly with perfume galore,
He lookd like a bum and he smelled like a whore.
"That was some brothel," he said with a smile,
"The reindeer are pooped, and I'll just stay here awhile.
He walked to the kitchen, himself poured a drink,
Then whipped out his pecker and pissed in the sink.
I started to laugh, my wife smiled with glee,
The old boy was hung nearly down to his knee.
Back in the den, Santa reached in his sack,
But his toys were all gone, and some new things were packed.
The first thing he found was a pair of false ,
The next was a handgun with a penis that spits.
A box filled with condoms was Santa's next find,
And a six pair of panties, the edible kind.
A bra without nipples, a penis extension,
And several other things that I shouldn't even mention.
A ring, a G-string, and all types of oil,
A dildo so long, it lay in a coil.
"This suff ain't for kids, Mrs. Santa will ,
So I'll leave 'em here, and then I'll just split."
He filled every stocking and then took his leave,
With one tiny butt plug tucked under his sleeve.
He sprang to his sleigh, but his feet were like lead,
Thus he fell on his ass and broke wind instead.
In time he was seated, took the reins of his hitch,
Saying, "Take me home Rudolph, this night's been a bitch!"
The sleigh was near gone when we heard Santa shout,
"The best thing about sex is that it never wears out!!"
:mad: |
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| tubularbills |
i don't get to put up an xmas tree this year :(
past two years i did. in fact, when i moved into my house in shreveport, i moved in dec 4, and the movers brought me my stuff on the 9th. it was the first thing i put up...even before i put my dishes away or clothes in the dresser.
i love Christmas and the entire advent season. :) |
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| tubularbills |
also this was my tree right after i moved in. its about 20 years old...and leans ever so slightly to the left. lol
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| Sushipunk |
| quote: | Originally posted by elFreak
you guys ing suck..i try to be festive and not an asshat for 5 seconds and this is what i get.:mad:
BIG BAG OF DICKS:mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: :mad: |
I hope you ing choke on that santa hat :mad: |
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| elFreak |
| maybe after the cocks. |
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