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Relationship troubles, i need help...
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| DJ RozzeR |
I have been in a relationship for 7 months now and i have enjoyed every minute of it..Last night we had a massive fall out, we both went clubbing , i went with my mates and she went with her mate, about 12pm i saw my g/f mate on her own , i asked her where my g/f was ? she said upstairs !! i thought who with ? then she went all ' I dunno' , so i went upstairs and i saw her on the dance floor and some guy kissing her neck , i ran over and pushed him out of the way and said wtf you doing mate this is my g/f , then my g/f steps in and pushes me to the wall and tries kissing me , i was having none of it , I said to her what are you playing at and she said were just friends and he was giving me a kiss for me helping out his relationship, i was really pissed off at this time and for some reason i hadda get out of there , my g/f was saying sorry and all and some dude was buying me a fricken drink.
I saw my g/f again and we were talkin and she said this' how would you feel if i was sleeping in the same bed as someone else would you trust me ? i said no ing way ! and that was that she started crying. My g/f is going to magaluff in 2 days for a week and i hope i can trust her. Im in a really pissed off and depressed mood at the moment , last night i got in about 2am and i put on my new rank 1 - album and thought about all the good times ive had , then i broke down and shedded a few tears. Im starting to feel like someone has ripped out my heart and eaten it.
RzR . |
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| flystyler |
| quote: | | this' how would you feel if i was sleeping in the same bed as someone else would you trust me ? i said no ing way |
Well there is yr answer, you dont trust her
Remember the key to a relationship is trust, if you dont have that you have nothing
So looks like she will have a good week at shagaluff without you
If you have been with her for 7 months why arent you going with her, a week with yr gf in a hot country, hmmmmmm. Sounds good to me
:o |
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| DevanteS |
the best thing for you now? vent out the anger, let it out. but do it away from her so she doesn't see that side of you. you've got to let it out so it doesn't eat you out. i think when i let my frustrations out, i was listening to Dumonde-GodMusic and started sceaming in my car
after the anger subsides, you'll be able to think better. remember, emotions cloud reason so you'll have to wait a few days to think with any clarity
pork |
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| Juricimo |
rought times. go with the gut feeling.
>JM< |
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| Widget |
Hey RozzeR
PALIVAR, FFS !!!!!
Not nice at all. You need to decide on how much you want to stay with her. If you do, then you both are going to have to earn the trust back between each other, something that will be anything but easy.
If you really feel that all trust is betrayed and she isn't worth the effort of getting it back, then end it, it will only get worse.
If you really like her a lot, then talk to her BEFORE she goes, tell her how hurt you were. BE HONEST!!! and say to her that you think the two of you need to think about everything for the week she is away. If nothing else it will give you a week to gather you thoughts and calm down.
You don't want to end the relationship and then in a week's time decide you made a mistake. |
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| Fir3start3r |
I agree with Flystyler.
If you don't trust her now what makes you think you'll trust her later?
The first two years of my relationship with my now wife, started off with her in University and me in College; a 3.5 hour drive apart!
Believe me, trust and communication are two of the largest cornerstones in any relationship.
Personally, I'd let it slide.
Why you ask? Good question young padawon... :p
At first you're probably thinking, "If I do let this go, she's think it's an invitation to walk all over me".
Well, this is a double-edged sword!
If she continues to do questionable things, have no fear, your friends will now begin to question her motives.
This way she'll hang herself AND you'll come out smelling like roses when it comes to time to cutting her off (if ya know what I mean).
But I will warn you now. This takes incredible self-control when it comes to the 'understanding' part and keeping your cool.
Best of luck. :) |
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| Orbax |
| Wait, you are saying he should trust her if shes in bed with someone? the whole point is that she would never get into bed with someone. or thats at least the way it should be. If you think shes the type of girl to "worry about" and you think she might sleep around, then toss her. If she doesnt seem like a person to trust, that means you dont trust her. so she is unworthy of your trust, untrustworthy hehe. if after 7 months you are still worried about that, and shes letting guys lick her in neck, shes usin you for something. |
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| c0ld 0ne |
Sucks to be you, dude.
All, I can say is that If I were you, I would let her go. It's obvious she doesn't like you in the first place, so then just give it up! |
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| Fir3start3r |
| quote: | Originally posted by Orbax
Wait, you are saying he should trust her if shes in bed with someone? the whole point is that she would never get into bed with someone. or thats at least the way it should be. If you think shes the type of girl to "worry about" and you think she might sleep around, then toss her. If she doesnt seem like a person to trust, that means you dont trust her. so she is unworthy of your trust, untrustworthy hehe. if after 7 months you are still worried about that, and shes letting guys lick her in neck, shes usin you for something. |
First off it was a hypothetical question and a very loaded question at that.
I would have answered that with a question of my own, "Would you go to bed with someone else?".
Even if she did, there's no way she could continue without it catching up with her and costing her a relationship.
Question though for you Roz, was she drunk at the time you caught her? |
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| DevanteS |
| quote: | Originally posted by Fir3start3r
Personally, I'd let it slide.
Why you ask? Good question young padawon... :p
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i disagree with you firestarter
here's the thing.
it all boils down to respect.
the fact that she let some creep near her, let alone kiss her show her absolute lack of respect for her bf.
with no respect, comes no trust which equates to nothing to look forward to.
Second chances are not given, they're earned.
Pork |
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| Fir3start3r |
| quote: | Originally posted by DevanteS
i disagree with you firestarter
here's the thing.
it all boils down to respect.
the fact that she let some creep near her, let alone kiss her show her absolute lack of respect for her bf.
with no respect, comes no trust which equates to nothing to look forward to.
Second chances are not given, they're earned.
Pork |
That all depends on how you want to come across though...
My suggestion was one of calm-cool-understanding waiting for a final blow.
The other way is to blow up, talk about dissin', and come across as a jerk with a possession problem.
Remember, they just had a fight before they went to the club.
Maybe she thought justified in that moment because of the fight.
It would be ty to come up the stairs and see that yes. I'm not trying to defend her here.
But some people do stupid things when stressed out (like after a fight) and it's for that reason I would let this one time slide.
I'm not saying build up a list of things she's done as long as your arm.
If she's really that bad, it'll become quite obvious. |
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| DevanteS |
| quote: | Originally posted by Fir3start3r
That all depends on how you want to come across though...
My suggestion was one of calm-cool-understanding waiting for a final blow.
The other way is to blow up, talk about dissin', and come across as a jerk with a possession problem.
Remember, they just had a fight before they went to the club.
Maybe she thought justified in that moment because of the fight.
It would be ty to come up the stairs and see that yes. I'm not trying to defend her here.
But some people do stupid things when stressed out (like after a fight) and it's for that reason I would let this one time slide.
I'm not saying build up a list of things she's done as long as your arm.
If she's really that bad, it'll become quite obvious. |
fire, you are right
but it's all about principle. just b/c i had a fight with my girl doesn't give me the right to go cheat on her.
rozz's gf broke a principle, so it's really up to him to take her back or not. if he does, then he has to be cautious
if he doesn't then maybe he's better off?
rozz, i think for you right now, you need to be away from her and let the anger out. go kill some squirrels or kick some helpless grannies in the butt. just get out
=) things will make more sense after you have control of your mind
pork
:happy2: |
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