|
lovers facts of life Don't do it ModernNosferatu
|
View this Thread in Original format
| ModernNosferatu |
You ever meet someone and fall in love get serious with one another but something keeps tearing your soul that says, Yes you do love this person and would do anything for them but the sad realization is your not really in love with, you just love them unconditionally. I am finding it very hard to let go and I honestly think she feels the same but everything I try to talk mature about the subject she gets pissed as if she is still trying to convince herself she "is in love with me" but I see all the signs, My family is decent off her family is poor but I never make a love judgement on status quo but her up bringing as kind left her with no goals, she has goals but I see no pursuit in them. She only lives 2 blocks away from me so this makes it harder to break up as we always end up kicking it and get back together. Back to her up brining that was not of her choice, a lot of fuc*ked up thinks happened to her and I'm schitzoaffective bi polar type mixed episodes. But I feel like I am lifting forward and being more creative even if it's something little. I'm afraid what will happen if I really dump her. But she leaves to Georgia soon to visit family for a month or two and that's when I think I should do the breaking up. Or she might break up with me first but this isn't about ego, if she breaks up with me first or vice versa I will be sad cause I deeply love her but it has to be the best, my soul tells me so.
Mt intellect is much higher than hers due to upbring and I'm really not educated, she is more of a humble quite person that has a great sense of humor but never has anything really interesting to talk about. Over and Out EMO MOdernNosferatu j.k |
|
|
| EddieZilker |
| quote: | Originally posted by ModernNosferatu
You ever meet someone and fall in love get serious with one another but something keeps tearing your soul that says, Yes you do love this person and would do anything for them but the sad realization is your not really in love with, you just love them unconditionally. I am finding it very hard to let go and I honestly think she feels the same but everything I try to talk mature about the subject she gets pissed as if she is still trying to convince herself she "is in love with me" but I see all the signs, My family is decent off her family is poor but I never make a love judgement on status quo but her up bringing as kind left her with no goals, she has goals but I see no pursuit in them. She only lives 2 blocks away from me so this makes it harder to break up as we always end up kicking it and get back together. Back to her up brining that was not of her choice, a lot of fuc*ked up thinks happened to her and I'm schitzoaffective bi polar type mixed episodes. But I feel like I am lifting forward and being more creative even if it's something little. I'm afraid what will happen if I really dump her. But she leaves to Georgia soon to visit family for a month or two and that's when I think I should do the breaking up. Or she might break up with me first but this isn't about ego, if she breaks up with me first or vice versa I will be sad cause I deeply love her but it has to be the best, my soul tells me so.
Mt intellect is much higher than hers due to upbring and I'm really not educated, she is more of a humble quite person that has a great sense of humor but never has anything really interesting to talk about. Over and Out EMO MOdernNosferatu j.k |
Dude. That's messed up. I've been where you're at, though. |
|
|
| Lira |
| quote: | | Yes you do love this person and would do anything for them but the sad realization is your not really in love with, you just love them unconditionally |
Could you elaborate on this bit? I can't see what you mean by this. |
|
|
| ModernNosferatu |
| quote: | Originally posted by Lira
Could you elaborate on this bit? I can't see what you mean by this. |
I love her unconditionally to the best of my abilities, this might not match up to your high qualities of what unconditional is as you are more educated than I. But I put up with a lot from her and let a lot of things slide because her brother just died 2 years ago on her birthday. I try NOT to make a big deal of out certain things and love her even when she is wrong in my eyes. Maybe I am not loving her unconditionally enough and that could be the problem,basically I am confused by all this. There are drugs involved in our relationship that plays a huge factor..sometimes I think that is when we are at out best is when were are high but I am kicking it and have it beat but she doesn't seem like she wants to change. |
|
|
| pkcRAISTLIN |
| I think you should learn to love sentences and paragraphs. |
|
|
| Lira |
| quote: | Originally posted by ModernNosferatu
I love her unconditionally to the best of my abilities, this might not match up to your high qualities of what unconditional is as you are more educated than I. |
Don't fool yourself, we're equals :)
| quote: | Originally posted by ModernNosferatu
But I put up with a lot from her and let a lot of things slide because her brother just died 2 years ago on her birthday. I try NOT to make a big deal of out certain things and love her even when she is wrong in my eyes. Maybe I am not loving her unconditionally enough and that could be the problem,basically I am confused by all this. There are drugs involved in our relationship that plays a huge factor..sometimes I think that is when we are at out best is when were are high but I am kicking it and have it beat but she doesn't seem like she wants to change. |
You mean you love her but you there's too much friction in your relationship? If that's so, I'm in a very similar situation, but I always took for granted that this is a necessary part of close human relationships. |
|
|
| EddieZilker |
| quote: | Originally posted by ModernNosferatu
I love her unconditionally to the best of my abilities, this might not match up to your high qualities of what unconditional is as you are more educated than I. But I put up with a lot from her and let a lot of things slide because her brother just died 2 years ago on her birthday. I try NOT to make a big deal of out certain things and love her even when she is wrong in my eyes. Maybe I am not loving her unconditionally enough and that could be the problem,basically I am confused by all this. There are drugs involved in our relationship that plays a huge factor..sometimes I think that is when we are at out best is when were are high but I am kicking it and have it beat but she doesn't seem like she wants to change. |
I lived with a girl for a couple of years because I just thought she was too fragile to do without someone. I understand what you mean - I think - that it's a kind of love for someone where you see all their good points and bad points and you kind of kick yourself because, given those things, the chemistry should be there, but it's not. There's no fire in the relationship; no passion.
Booze clouding both of our judgments didn't help matters. If you're kicked and she's not, that can be an unholy hell to survive - and I've been there, too. I wound up leaving, right after a really nasty fight that probably wouldn't have happened without us both being completely sloshed.
After I left, though, I had a lot of time to look at myself. I don't have any regrets, regarding her, but I definitely saw the things about myself which brought out the worst in her. I'm not saying that's the case with you and it definitely sounds like you two would do well to spend some time, apart.
Sorry you're going through this, dude. |
|
|
| Cpt.Cocaine |
| quote: | Originally posted by pkcRAISTLIN
I think you should learn to love sentences and paragraphs. |
Unconditionally so, but without being in love with them. |
|
|
| ModernNosferatu |
| quote: | Originally posted by pkcRAISTLIN
I think you should learn to love sentences and paragraphs. |
this arbiter's chief minion
I dream sometimes you lived in my neighborhood just to well you know, beat the f*ck out of you. You would probably try and cast a spell on me in real life.
Your so clever my friend, I'm boggled that you took some what of a heart felt Thread and looked for flaws, there is always one isn't there |
|
|
| pkcRAISTLIN |
| quote: | Originally posted by ModernNosferatu
this arbiter's chief minion
I dream sometimes you lived in my neighborhood just to well you know, beat the f*ck out of you. You would probably try and cast a spell on me in real life.
Your so clever my friend, I'm boggled that you took some what of a heart felt Thread and looked for flaws, there is always one isn't there |
:stongue: fantastic. |
|
|
|
|
