This video really only explains things I feel I already know on some level, but it's interesting nonetheless. I've never been in a terrible situation like losing someone very close to me or an accident, but I have always found my happiness comes from within, not the other way around.
Abercrombie
quote:
Originally posted by Domesticated
I have always found my happiness comes from within, not the other way around.
I disagree... jerking off will never be better than real sex.
Zyklon_Jay
it sometimes is....quick and easy does it.
i can jerk off in the parking lot of a wendy's much more incognito than if i had sex there per se.
MrJiveBoJingles
The "waste of time" judgment is also suggested by the "happiness set-point" theory, which is that you have gloomy people, cheery people, and people in the middle, and for the most part a person's basic temperament never changes. Which means that if you've mostly been a sad sack so far, you'll probably be that way forever. Except a few happy interludes here and there.
:p
Domesticated
To anyone who actually watches the lecture, I found the photography course experiment extremely relevant to myself. I'm a very decisive person: I prefer to make quick choices and then deal with the consequences later, good or bad. Obviously I only do this when there's little information about which choice will be better, like in the experiment. This approach has nearly always worked out well for me, and made me happy.
While travelling extensively this year, I had a friend with me who was the complete opposite; even when it comes to choosing a meal, he can't make up his mind and always asks for more time to think. Watching him, it became apparent to me that this approach nearly always left him unhappy, feeling he'd made the wrong choice.
On one leg of the trip, his girlfriend joined us, who is also extremely indecisive. I was prevented from making decisions about where to go and what to do, because I was always out-voted in favour of waiting it out. This section turned out to be the least enjoyable part of my eight months of travel.
Zyklon_Jay
It is your fault for putting up with that kind of honestly.
Domesticated
quote:
Originally posted by Zyklon_Jay
It is your fault for putting up with that kind of honestly.
Don't be an idiot. You don't travel with someone for five months and then suddenly decide to dump them because of a couple of bad weeks. Travelling is like a mini marriage - you have to ride out the good and the bad, together.
igottaknow
While I think his findings are interesting it didn't lead me to the same conclusion. It instead left me with more questions about the nature of happiness and its application. For example if he showed this video to the people he tested would it change the out come?
MrJiveBoJingles
quote:
Originally posted by Domesticated
While travelling extensively this year, I had a friend with me who was the complete opposite; even when it comes to choosing a meal, he can't make up his mind and always asks for more time to think. Watching him, it became apparent to me that this approach nearly always left him unhappy, feeling he'd made the wrong choice.
On one leg of the trip, his girlfriend joined us, who is also extremely indecisive. I was prevented from making decisions about where to go and what to do, because I was always out-voted in favour of waiting it out. This section turned out to be the least enjoyable part of my eight months of travel.
I am the dithering type, too, always taking a long time and then regretting / analyzing my past choices.
MrJiveBoJingles
quote:
Originally posted by igottaknow
For example if he showed this video to the people he tested would it change the out come?
Probably not.
People don't like to believe that the conclusions of psychology apply to them. We're all unique snowflakes, exempt from generalizations. Gilbert discusses this in his book, Stumbling On Happiness.
:p
infiniteJEST
I've always felt I was a snowflake.
Zyklon_Jay
quote:
Originally posted by Domesticated
Don't be an idiot. You don't travel with someone for five months and then suddenly decide to dump them because of a couple of bad weeks. Travelling is like a mini marriage - you have to ride out the good and the bad, together.
The person that pretty much had his balls on a leash is calling me an idiot.;)
Don't like what they want to do, do your own thing...unless you like to be a latchkey kid that is.
