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How close should students get to their teachers/professors?
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| Lira |
I was talking to a couple of friends about this issue, and I thought the difference in our outlooks were interesting, and decided to bring the debate here.
One of my friends, for example, won't accept a single friend request from her students on Facebook, and tries to keep her distance so as to make sure the students know it's a professional relationship - not a personal one. The less students know about her, the better. There's no problem with gossip because students know very little about your life, and they won't "lose the respect" they have for you because they won't think of you as a friend. She claims she's seen many teacher get into trouble for giving students too much space, although she wasn't able to give me a clear case.
I, on the other hand, believe this is a terribly misguided approach. For one thing, students will gossip about teachers they despise no matter what - if they can't find anything to talk about, it's just a matter of time until someone makes something up and all this secrecy may be seen as a way to hide these petty worries. Also, being "transparent" and "friendly" to your students is also a good way of showing your students you're a human being not unlike them... and if they want to have one more way of contacting you for whatever reason, why not? Besides, it's fun as a teacher to see my former pupils growing in life after the classes are over.
I wouldn't, however, befriend my students and associate with them during the semester, lest they believe they can exchange their grades for favours and the like. It's apparently common in Japan though, and I've had professors asking the students out for a beer after class.
Thoughts? |
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| Silky Johnson |
Don't you have professional standards you have to follow, including boundaries in relationships with your students? I think it's inappropriate to engage in social relationships with your students. Once they are no longer your student, sure...but if you're actively employed in the role of their educator, I think it's wrong. I don't really consider it any different than my job - where there is potential to abuse one's power/authority, or where the vulnerable person (the student) may potentially misconstrue the relationship. We have clear practice standards to follow, and what is considered the "therapeutic relationship" is clearly defined. Teachers don't have something similar??
If they want to contact you, can't they do it by email? I really just don't think Facebook is the appropriate outlet.
Former pupils, sure...but current students...man, that's asking for trouble imo. |
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| Silky Johnson |
| I mean helloooo, take a look at Florida ffs! :o |
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| Lira |
| quote: | Originally posted by Miss Pie
Don't you have professional standards you have to follow, including boundaries in relationships with your students? I think it's inappropriate to engage in social relationships with your students. |
That's why I don't hang out with them, as I stated in my last paragraph.
To my knowledge, there's no rule (written or otherwise) about social media in my department, as adding students is pretty much standard there. However, there are many Japanese professors in my department, reason why I mentioned they often take students out to dinner and the like. I've always refrained from inviting my students to pretty much anything, and I've always declined similar invitations from them.
I've never seen this become a problem... although I did have a problematic student add me on Facebook only to defriend me in less than a week after he started spewing intolerant messages and I tried to reason with him - something I'd have done in class and/or at the university as well had I heard him say those things.
| quote: | Originally posted by Miss Pie
Once they are no longer your student, sure...but if you're actively employed in the role of their educator, I think it's wrong. I don't really consider it any different than my job - where there is potential to abuse one's power/authority, or where the vulnerable person (the student) may potentially misconstrue the relationship. We have clear practice standards to follow, and what is considered the "therapeutic relationship" is clearly defined. Teachers don't have something similar?? |
Like I said, not that I'm aware of. Besides, social media is something very new, and just a fraction of professors can be found on websites like Facebook.
| quote: | Originally posted by Miss Pie
If they want to contact you, can't they do it by email? I really just don't think Facebook is the appropriate outlet. |
As a matter of fact, yes, I even created an e-mail address specially for them. But, if they feel like adding me on Facebook, I don't see why not. This friend is the first person I've seen who keeps this much distance from her student, reason why I thought it was an interesting topic for debate.
| quote: | Originally posted by Miss Pie
Former pupils, sure...but current students...man, that's asking for trouble imo. |
I don't know, what's the worst that could happen? (On Facebook, that is)
Edit: I must also say I don't send friend request to (former) students, ever, so it's not something I'm actively seeking. |
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| Lira |
| quote: | Originally posted by Miss Pie
I mean helloooo, take a look at Florida ffs! :o |
:stongue:
That's why, like I said, I avoid hanging out with them. Even at the end of the semester, I refrain from attending "farewell parties". |
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| Silky Johnson |
Yeah, I really don't think it's appropriate, for reasons already outlined. There is far too much potential for boundaries to be crossed, either way.
Would you really need a specific rule outlining why it's not appropriate? I mean come on. It's pretty obvious that social media is a huge no-no, imo. Unless you're creating a strictly professional account, different from your personal one, to engage with your students.
Why you would bring up the gossip thing as an argument either for or against it is totally irrelevant to what the issue actually is with having this kind of "relationship" with your students. |
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| Silky Johnson |
| And sorry, I don't mean YOU specifically...I should have used the 'one/one's' pronoun instead. :p |
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| Silky Johnson |
| :gsmile: :gsmile: |
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| Lira |
| quote: | Originally posted by Miss Pie
Would you really need a specific rule outlining why it's not appropriate? I mean come on. It's pretty obvious that social media is a huge no-no, imo. Unless you're creating a strictly professional account, different from your personal one, to engage with your students. |
Actually, it isn't so obvious (to us), as my privacy-loving friend doesn't seem to have considered this either.
As for the rule, I don't need one, but I'm always looking for arguments in order to rethink my behaviour in case it's wrong, that's why I asked for one. I know therapists must avoid this kind of close contact because this can cloud their judgement and the patients may be affected in the wrong way as well. However, wouldn't family doctors, for example, have their patients on Facebook? Just a while ago some kid on 9gag shared a post by his dentist, which took me by surprise... but I can see why this may happen at times.
| quote: | Originally posted by Miss Pie
Why you would bring up the gossip thing as an argument either for or against it is totally irrelevant to what the issue actually is with having this kind of "relationship" with your students. |
That was my friend's argument, and the first argument against having your students on Facebook I heard, and because I don't agree with her, I felt I should state my reasons. I believe it's a weak argument, reason why I'm looking for a better one :) |
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| srussell0018 |
| Who is moleinthehole? Isn't that a pic of Jennie? |
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| Moongoose |
If you're student gets pregnant, you've become too close.
Unless shes really really hot. |
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| Silky Johnson |
| quote: | Originally posted by srussell0018
Who is moleinthehole? Isn't that a pic of Jennie? |
I laugh every time some butthurt loser creates an alt account directed towards me. I win! |
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