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*cybersex*
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| Henkie_henk |
No one wants to cyber with me... I still can't figure it out...
Whpdnky: Hello, TightVirgin. What do you look like?
TightVirgin: I am wearing a red silk blouse, a miniskirt and high
heels. I work out every day, I'm toned and perfect. My measurements
are 36-24-36. What do you look like?
Whpdnky: I'm 6'3" and about 250 pounds. I wear glasses and I have on a
pair of blue sweat pants I just bought from Wal-Mart. I'm also wearing
a T-shirt with a few spots of barbecue sauce on it from dinner. It's
smells funny.
TightVirgin: I want you! Would you like to screw me?
Whpdnky: OK
TightVirgin: We're in my bedroom. There's soft music playing on
the stereo and candles on my dresser and night table. I'm looking up
into your eyes, smiling. My hand works its way down to your crotch and
begins to fondle your huge, swelling bulge.
Whpdnky: I'm gulping, I'm beginning to sweat.
TightVirgin: I'm pulling up your shirt and kissing your chest.
Whpdnky: Now I'm unbuttoning your blouse. My hands are trembling.
TightVirgin: I'm moaning softly.
Whpdnky: I'm taking hold of your blouse and sliding it off slowly.
TightVirgin: I'm throwing my head back in pleasure. The cool silk
slides off my warm skin. I'm rubbing your bulge faster, pulling and
rubbing.
Whpdnky: My hands suddenly jerks spastically and accidentally rips a
hole in your blouse. I'm sorry.
TightVirgin: That's OK, it wasn't really too expensive.
Whpdnky: I'll pay for it.
TightVirgin: Don't worry about it. I'm wearing a lacy black bra.
My soft breasts are rising and falling, as I breath harder and harder.
Whpdnky: I'm fumbling with the clasp on your bra. I think it's stuck.
Do you have any scissors?
TightVirgin: I take your hand and kiss it softly...I'm reaching
back undoing the clasp. The bra slides off my body. The air caresses
my breasts. My nipples are erect for you.
Whpdnky: How did you do that? I'm picking up the bra and inspecting
the clasp.
TightVirgin: I'm arching my back. Oh baby. I just want to feel
your tongue all over me.
Whpdnky: I'm dropping the bra. Now I'm licking your, you know,
giggles. They're neat!
TightVirgin: I'm running my fingers through your hair. Now I'm
nibbling your ear.
Whpdnky: I suddenly sneeze. Your breasts are covered with spit and
phlegm.
TightVirgin: What?
Whpdnky: I'm so sorry... really.
TightVirgin: I'm wiping your phlegm off my breasts with the
remains of my blouse.
Whpdnky: I'm taking the sopping wet blouse from you. I drop it with a
plop.
TightVirgin: OK. I'm pulling your sweat pants down and rubbing
you hard tool.
Whpdnky: I'm screaming like a woman. Your hands are cold! Yeeee!
TightVirgin: I'm pulling up my miniskirt. Take of my panties!
Whpdnky: I'm pulling off your panties. My tongue is going all over, in
and out and wild on your clit... ummm... wait a minute.
TightVirgin: What's the matter?
Whpdnky: I've got a pubic hair caught in my throat. I'm choking!
TightVirgin: Are you OK?
Whpdnky: I'm having a coughing fit! I'm turning all red.
TightVirgin: Can I help?
Whpdnky: I'm running to the kitchen, choking wildly. I'm fumbling
through the cabinets, looking for a cup. Where do you keep your cups?
TightVirgin: In the cabinet to the right of the sink.
Whpdnky: I'm drinking a cup of water. There, that's better.
TightVirgin: Come back to me lover.
Whpdnky: I'm washing the cup now.
TightVirgin: I'm on the bed arching for you.
Whpdnky: I'm drying the cup. Now I'm putting it back in the cabinet.
And now I'm walking back to the bedroom. Wait, it's dark, I'm lost.
Where's the bedroom?
TightVirgin: Last door on the left at the end of the hall.
Whpdnky: I found it.
TightVirgin: I'm tuggin' off your pants. I'm moaning. I want you
so badly.
Whpdnky: Me too.
TightVirgin: Your pants are off. I kiss you passionately our
naked bodies pressing each other.
Whpdnky: Your face is pushing my glasses into my face. It hurts.
TightVirgin: Why don't you take off your glasses?
Whpdnky: OK, but I can't see very well without them. I place the
glasses on the night table.
TightVirgin: I'm bending over the bed. Give it to me, baby!
Whpdnky: I have to pee. I'm fumbling my way blindly across the room
and toward the bathroom.
TightVirgin: Hurry back, lover!
Whpdnky: I find the bathroom and it's dark. I'm feeling around for the
toilet. I lift the lid.
TightVirgin: I'm waiting eagerly for your return.
Whpdnky: I'm done going. I'm feeling around for the flush handle, but
I can't find it. Uh-oh!
TightVirgin: What's the matter now?
Whpdnky: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry
again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
TightVirgin: Mmmm, yes. Come on.
Whpdnky: OK, now I'm going to put my...you know...thing...in your...
you know...woman's thing. Do you have a condom?
TightVirgin: Yes! Do it, baby! Do it! I'll get you a condom.
Whpdnky: I'm touching your smooth butt. It feels so nice. I kiss your
neck. Umm, I'm having a little trouble here.
TightVirgin: I'm moving my ass back and forth, moaning. I can't
stand it another second! Slide in! Screw me now!
Whpdnky: I'm flaccid.
TightVirgin: What?
Whpdnky: I'm limp. I can't sustain an erection.
TightVirgin: I'm standing up and turning around, an incredulous
look on my face.
Whpdnky: I'm shrugging with a sad look on my face, my wiener is all
floppy. I'm going to get my glasses and see what's wrong.
TightVirgin: No, never mind. I'm getting dressed. I'm putting on
my underwear. Now I'm putting on my wet nasty blouse.
Whpdnky: No wait! Now I'm squinting, trying to find the night table.
I'm feeling along the dresser, knocking over cans of hair spray,
picture frames and your candles.
TightVirgin: I'm buttoning my blouse. Now I'm putting on my
shoes.
Whpdnky: I've found my glasses. I'm putting them on. My God! One of
our candles fell on the curtain. The curtain is on fire! I'm pointing
at it, a shocked look on my face.
TightVirgin: Go to hell! I'm logging off, you loser!
Whpdnky: Now the carpet is on fire! Oh nooooo!
TightVirgin: you!
Whpdnky: Bwahahaha!!!!!!!!!! |
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| Zombie0915 |
| holy crap! thats funny as hell henk! where do you get that stuff. There are a bunch of people in my computer science class who are just like that guy, heh. |
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| Flippe |
Good Stuff Henk!!
Really like your jokes Where do you find them? |
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| TranceFusion |
| Alright how did you get a copy of that????:conf: :conf: :conf: :whip: LOL J.K Damn good post hehehe :D:D:D:D:D:D:D |
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| Boy trance |
| That guy rules!!! You da man Henk! :stongue: |
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| sothis |
| quote: | | Alright how did you get a copy of that???? |
youve never seen this before? its been going around on message boards and mass emails for a few years |
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| lMIlk |
| quote: | Originally posted by TranceFusion
Alright how did you get a copy of that????:conf: :conf: :conf: :whip: LOL J.K Damn good post hehehe :D:D:D:D:D:D:D |
ya its very old |
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| mtguru |
| that has to be the funnest things I've read in a long time, thanks for the laugh |
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| TranceFusion |
| quote: | Originally posted by sothis
youve never seen this before? its been going around on message boards and mass emails for a few years |
| quote: | Originally posted by lMIlk
ya its very old |
Well it was a joke guys ha ha :stongue: I was making it sound as if the conversation was mine....I was "wondering how they got a copy of that..." man some peeps worry me....:rolleyes: |
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| Coup |
| that is one of the funniest things ive ever read! |
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| OrZonE |
I believe this is the funniest thing I have read in my entire life!!!
This is amazing material
| quote: | Originally posted by Henkie_henk
No one wants to cyber with me... I still can't figure it out...
Whpdnky: I've realized that I've peed into your laundry hamper. Sorry
again. I'm walking back to the bedroom now, blindly feeling my way.
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ROTFL
This just killed me!!!
:D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D :D |
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| inatrance |
| quality! hope nobody made that by themselves :) be funnier if it really happened |
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