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six million ways to die (pg. 7)
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| {b.s.e.} |
| quote: | Originally posted by ::TranceVanDyk::
MINE RHYMES BITCHES!!!!!:whip: :whip: :whip: |
| quote: | Originally posted by {b.s.e.}
i'm not in the habit of commiting suicide. may i offer you some cyanide? |
mine was better. :wtf: |
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| SteelWolf |
| electrically related accident to the penis |
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| Taz |
| quote: | Originally posted by Phil raa
Explosives Strapped to Your Body
Get a LOT of explosives. The more the better.
Hook up a detonator to an altimeter. Set it for 100-200 feet. That will give you good dispersion.
Mix vaseline and gasoline in a bucket.
Find a really tall building. Something like the World Trade Center (not anymore, but you get the idea) is perfect and is in a sufficiently crowded area to generate the proper sized crowd.
Get an extra large trench coat, ski mask, duct tape and a lighter.
Bring your materials to the top of your building. Liberally apply the vaseline-gasoline mixture to your entire body. Duct tape the explosives around your legs, arms, head and torso. The more you use the better. You cannot overdo this. Attach the altimeter to the explosives.
Put on the trench coat and mask so that the explosives are not visible.
Start ranting and throwing things so that you are sure to attract notice. Drag this part out as long as possible. Say anything that comes to mind but try to stay away from real problems. Your love life DOES NOT make for a good sound bite. Ask for news cameras from the major networks. Pace around a lot while waving your arms.
DO NOT let on that you have explosives on your body. The police will clear the area and you definitely don't want that.
When you've gotten the crowd to a fevered pitch, when the helicopters are hovering like vultures, whip off the jacket and set yourself on fire.
Wait until you are completely engulfed in flame then jump.
Try to steer yourself towards the crowd. That way flaming falling body parts will pelt the fleeing onlookers when you explode. |
Dude, change jobs! If this is what you're capable of thinking of, it's time to get out of stressville.
That's all I have to say.
:D |
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| Zenchowdah |
Materials Necesary:
Car Battery
Jumper Cables
Genitals
Instructions:
Self Explanatory |
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| muzzybear |
| Having snow fall from the top of your building onto you, only it's ice and it cracks your skull. Ow! |
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| Zenchowdah |
| quote: | Originally posted by muzzybear
Having snow fall from the top of your building onto you, only it's ice and it cracks your skull. Ow! |
oo that happened to my dad once, he got slammed in the back by this huge icicle. hes ok now though :) |
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| muzzybear |
| quote: | Originally posted by Zenchowdah
oo that happened to my dad once, he got slammed in the back by this huge icicle. hes ok now though :) |
Geez! There are a lot of big icicles around Toronto right now with lots of snowfall, and melting and refreezing and stuff. I'm glad your dad's ok!
I've been listening to the snow fall off my building all day. It freaked the cats out, and sounded like someone was running around in the rafters! |
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| Xenocreator_PG_ |
| Sudden urge to jump into a fire while you happen to be holding a can of petrol. |
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| Xenocreator_PG_ |
| cock-blocked to death |
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| Sky_Force |
| trying to get killed with cooked potato... |
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