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The good wife's guide
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| bass drive |
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"this is taken from an old magazine from 1955 called "housekeeping monthly."
The Good wife's guide
1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary
people.
3. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives.
5. Gather up school books, toys, paper etc and then run a dustcloth over the tables.
6. Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
7. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimise all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try and encourage the children to be quiet.
8. Be happy to see him.
9. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him.
10. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours.
11. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax.
12. Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquillity where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit.
13. Don't greet him with complaints and problems.
14. Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day.
15. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him.
16. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
17. Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him.
18. A good wife always knows her place.
Be sure to print this off and put it on the fridge ladies :toocool: |
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| preppie chick |
| ummmmm how about BLOW ME?!?!?! |
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| SurrJRS |
"I would never let a woman kick my ass. If she tried anything, I'd be like: hey, you get your bitch ass back in the kitchen and make me some pie!"
--Eric Cartman
:stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: |
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| b4k-oz |
copy/paste
"this is taken from the perspective of a new reader to the magazine called "housekeeping monthly."
"ummmmm how about BLOW ME?!?!?!"
by Ms. preppie chick
:stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: bass drive me thinks you got your answer :stongue: |
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| bass drive |
| quote: | Originally posted by b4k-oz
copy/paste
"this is taken from the perspective of a new reader to the magazine called "housekeeping monthly."
"ummmmm how about BLOW ME?!?!?!"
by Ms. preppie chick
:stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: bass drive me thinks you got your answer :stongue: |
forget about her, she'll die alone
you'll stick to the list though, right? :D |
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| b4k-oz |
Well apparently there is a husband's guide too
Ahem...with some subtle differences (item 9) which must be read
The Good husband's guide
1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for her return from a higher paying job than yours. This is a way of letting her know that you have been thinking about her and are concerned about her needs. Most women are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially her favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed.
2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when she arrives. Comb your hair, wash up and brush your teeth and be fresh looking. She has just been with a lot of work-weary
people and needs to know that her man isn't taking her for granted.
3. Be a little cheerful and a little more interesting for her. Her boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.
4. Clear away your clutter. Since we know the wife doesn't leave messes, make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your wife arrives.
5. Pick-up the kids or if you don't have kids, take out the dog for a walk.
6. Over the course of the year you should prepare and run a hot bath and a glass of wine for her so she can unwind. Your wife will feel she has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for her comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction.
7. If there are children from this marriage, prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures which she carried for 9 months and she would like to see them playing the part. Minimize all noise. At the time of her arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try and encourage the children to be quiet.
8. Be happy to see her and greet her with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please her.
9. Learn to be at her beck and call when she needs you sexually. Remember this is not about your satisfaction, it's about her's. Do what she wants when she wants to be freaky. Accept your losses if she is not in the mood and prefers to self-gratify by watching Jude Law or some other movie start on the Teli.
10. Listen to her. You may have a dozen important things to tell her but the moment of her arrival is not the time. Let her talk first - remember, her topics of conversation are more important than yours.
11. Make the evening hers. Never complain if she comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead try to understand her world of strain and pressure and her very real need to be at home and relax.
12. Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquillity where your wife can renew herself in body and spirit.
13. Don't greet her with complaints and problems.
14. Don't complain if she's late home for dinner or even if she stays out all night. It may be that she needs the comfort of another before coming home to you. Count this as minor compared to what she might have gone through that day.
15. Make her comfortable. Have her lean back in a comfortable chair or have her lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for her.
16. Arrange her pillow and offer to take off her shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
17. Don't ask her questions about her actions or question her judgement or integrity. Remember, she is the master of the house and as such will always exercise her will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question her.
18. A good husband always knows his place.
Be sure to print this off and put it in your briefcase gentlemen
LOL bass drive ...why of course I'll try and stick to the list :stongue: |
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| malek |
| thanks bass drive, I'm taking notes :D |
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| Jayx1 |
| quote: | Originally posted by bass drive
copy/paste
"this is taken from an old magazine from 1955 called "housekeeping monthly."
The Good wife's guide
| quote: |
1. Have dinner ready. Plan ahead, even the night before, to have a delicious meal ready, on time for his return. This is a way of letting him know that you have been thinking about him and are concerned about his needs. Most men are hungry when they come home and the prospect of a good meal (especially his favourite dish) is part of the warm welcome needed. |
2005 version: Make sure you have reservations for an expensive Yorkdale restaurant and plan days in advance to get a good table. Of course he will pay even though you are fully capable yourself, being such a successful career woman.
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2. Prepare yourself. Take 15 minutes to rest so you'll be refreshed when he arrives. Touch up your make-up, put a ribbon in your hair and be fresh looking. He has just been with a lot of work-weary
people. |
2005: Prepare yourself. Take 4 hours to rest and pamper yourself at the most expensive salon in the city. Perhaps a new addition to the wardrobe is in order. Show him that working with work weary people is paying off.
| quote: |
3. Be a little gay and a little more interesting for him. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it. |
2005: Be a little gay and have a threesome with another woman. His boring day may need a lift and one of your duties is to provide it.Or perhaps you just want to have a secret female lover. It's your right to do so.
| quote: | | 4. Clear away the clutter. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives. |
2005: Clear away the clutter by calling Molly Maid at his expense of course. Make one last trip through the main part of the house just before your husband arrives to make sure your younger lover has vacated.
| quote: | | 5. Gather up school books, toys, paper etc and then run a dustcloth over the tables. |
2005: Don't worry about it since you always eat dinner out anyways.
| quote: | | 6. Over the cooler months of the year you should prepare and light a fire for him to unwind by. Your husband will feel he has reached a haven of rest and order and it will give you a lift too. After all, catering for his comfort will provide you with immense personal satisfaction. |
2005: Turn up the furnace, you are cold after all.
| quote: | | 7. Prepare the children. Take a few minutes to wash the children's hands and faces (if they are small), comb their hair and if necessary change their clothes. They are little treasures and he would like to see them playing the part. Minimise all noise. At the time of his arrival, eliminate all noise of the washer, dryer or vacuum. Try and encourage the children to be quiet. |
2005: Call a nanny
| quote: | | 8. Be happy to see him. |
2005: He should be happy to see you... and he should be lucky you don't walk out on him with most of his stuff
| quote: | | 9. Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. |
2005: Greet him with a warm smile and show sincerity in your desire to please him. But only after he has spent at least $500 on you during the evening
| quote: | | 10. Listen to him. You may have a dozen important things to tell him but the moment of his arrival is not the time. Let him talk first - remember, his topics of conversation are more important than yours. |
2005: nag him until he submits. if he doesn't submit, leave him. You are better than that.
| quote: | | 11. Make the evening his. Never complain if he comes home late or goes out to dinner, or other places of entertainment without you. Instead try to understand his world of strain and pressure and his very real need to be at home and relax. |
2005: If he doesnt come home on time, call his cell phone every 5 minutes until he has no choice but to come home and face your wrath.
| quote: | | 12. Your goal: Try to make sure your home is a place of peace, order and tranquillity where your husband can renew himself in body and spirit. |
2005: Your goal: try and get your man to buy you a day at the spa so you can renew yourself in body and spirit.
| quote: | | 13. Don't greet him with complaints and problems. |
2005: Don't greet him, indifference keeps him wondering.
| quote: | | 14. Don't complain if he's late home for dinner or even if he stays out all night. Count this as minor compared to what he might have gone through that day. |
2005: If he doesnt come home. change the locks. The law is on your side even if the house is in his name. Give him a cell phone so you can keep tabs on him.
| quote: | | 15. Make him comfortable. Have him lean back in a comfortable chair or have him lie down in the bedroom. Have a cool or warm drink ready for him. |
2005: Tell him to mow the lawn
| quote: | | 16. Arrange his pillow and offer to take off his shoes. Speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice. |
2005: Go out and buy 10 pairs of shoes. When you give him the bill, speak in a low, soothing and pleasant voice.
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17. Don't ask him questions about his actions or question his judgement or integrity. Remember, he is the master of the house and as such will always exercise his will with fairness and truthfulness. You have no right to question him. |
2005: Remember you are always right because males are dumb
| quote: | | 18. A good wife always knows her place. |
2005: A good wife always knows her husbands financial status.
Be sure to print this off and put it on the fridge ladies :toocool: |
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| b4k-oz |
^^^^^^ sucker!!
I know you were thinking about that bimbo that wanted you to pay for her car gas after leaving your bud stuck with the bill :stongue: :stongue: |
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| Jayx1 |
| LOL yeah but a sucker would have given it to her :) |
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| Jayx1 |
Actually with the exception of "he is the master of his house" i think these are pretty good things to live by. The only difference is that I'd call it a guide to being a good wife or husband. If both wife and husband did these things for each other equally you'd have a pretty happy household. Sadly the reversal of paternalism has actually led to a lot of disrespect coming from the other side in modern relationships instead of egalitarianism which is what should have happened. Showing respect from both sides is never a bad thing.
Sadly life today is more likely what is portrayed on Everybody Loves Raymond. Poor Raymond, such a nice guy and such a SUCKER!
LOL |
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