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My Story.. per request of Leopold Stotch & Stren
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| D-res |
LONG READ...
There's a girl named Erica....
Who is she??!?!!?
She's an ex-girlfriend of mine from about 2 and a half years ago. We went out when i was a sophomore in HS and broke up a few months later. We broke up for a couple reasons, although im kinda confused still.... Basically it happened cause she was a typical high school teen girl. She partied, drank, whatever. At the time i was a little good boy and thought that was wrong. In fact, it bothered me so much.... ick.... anyway, i tried convincing her to stop and whatever. That and i was a needy little bitch. Basically she went to Mexico for vacation to Cancun with her family during christmas break, came back, and broke up with me a week or so later.
Her friends said i was too controlling and wouldnt let her do what she wanted, etc.
When her and i went out she kept talking up about how we were getting married and kids n ... being the relationship kinda guy that i am, and of course a niave little sophomore idiot, i believed every word, and loved it. When she broke up with me, i was lost.. like.. idk what happened to me. I was a lot more unsociable and overall pretty unhappy. it bothered me for a long time and i could never seem to get over it.
When i say never, i literally mean like.. never. As sad as it sounds she was basically my "first love" per se, and I never thought i'd find a girl who would take her place.
After two years of searching and many quality relationships, and of course, two difficult long distance ones, i thought i found the one. First there was Jorden. Great girl, no doubt but we were too far apart, and to be honest with myself and everyone else, we were far too different to ever work out. I met her through a friend. She used to live in my town, but moved two years ago to Charlotte, NC when her dad had a job transfer or something. She came back to visit some friends during homecoming but was dateless... well here i was, just chillin here, also dateless when my phone rings. Her friend Jena, a girl who she was staying with mentioned that since we were both dateless, we should go together. I was hesitant, but ultimately accepted. That weekend was rather awkward considering we hadnt known eachother beforehand. I felt it wouldnt be right to leave on a bad note, so i got her email and started talking to her online. To say the least, we talked a LOT and in november of 2004, we went out.
As i mentioned, she was cool but we were very different. She was religious, i am not.. she was controlled by her parents, while i am free to do almost anything and my parents, while still loving, let me do what i want. Also there were just a bunch of little things that bugged me, distance being one. it wasnt anything big but none the less, the distance combined with the fact that we're almost completely different eventually led to the demise of our relationship. If she reads this, i want her to know that she is a great girl and is def one of the coolest i've ever met.
Next was Lauren. For those of you who dont know, she just happened to be a best friend with Jorden. The relationship with Lauren kind of happened out of nowhere. We just talked a lot and somehow found something for eachother. She, unlike Jorden, was basically the exact same as me. I know opposites attract, but her and I had SOOOO much in common it was scary and we also had the exact same personality. We talked for 13 hours nonstop one day. That day we also went out, April 2. A week or so later, we decided to do the right thing and come clean to Jorden, because she was completely oblivious to the whole situation.
To put it simply, she was about 2305125198 steps beyond pissed. The way she reacted to me coming clean was expected, although not to the degree that she did. I feel terrible about the whole thing, cause i really hurt a close friend and whatnot but it was innevitable.
ANNNYway, back to Lauren. We were a lot alike but both stubborn and two incredibly stubborn people dont mix. The relationship went deep and because we were so alike and connected so well, it seemed like she might actually be the one who gets me to forget about Erica. Well.. i was wrong. Out of nowhere, just as how we got together, we broke up. It was simple and short and although we both had strong urges to get back together (she sitll might.. i dono) we remained apart... funny thing is, this is very recent... so yeah. We wanted to get back together but we werent sure. She went on vacation and said she was going to think about it.
Since Erica and i broke up, we havent really hung out. We've been "in school" friends but nothing really more. In fact we werent even that last year (my junior year) because she didnt even go to my school. Reason being, her mom lives about 30 miles away while her dad lives here. She goes to her moms on the weekends and during summer, but she's here otherwise. My whole junior year she lived at her mom's and went to school there aswell. During my senior year (her junior) as in, this past year, she came back to my school. We had spanish class together first semester and Study hall together second semester. During study hall we would talk and whatnot, but we rarely did anything outside of school.
In fact, we've really only hung out twice since we broke up. We hung out awhile ago. I drove down there and her and her sister met me at a mall. We hung around and then went to b&n and basically went our seperate ways. Now as i mentioned before, i never really got over the relationship. She meant a lot to me... more than anyone ever has or will for a loooong time. A lot of poeple dont know this. Most people thought i was over her completely a long ass time ago, but in all honesty, I never fully was. I feel weird admitting that, but im not gonna bottle up. its unhealthy.
Anyhoo, the other morning her and i were talking online and i mentioned how i had broken up with Lauren and how she was supposed to find me a girl. She mentioned some girl sarcastically that she worked with and mentioned that her and i should hang out sometime this week after she got out of work. Obviously, still having something for her (as sad as that is) i was down. She said she'd call me the next day, but never did.. or the next day...
I talked to her sister online and told her to have her call me, but again, she didnt. then i asked when she worked.. i decided i was gonna come visit her at work, not having other plans for the day. She said she didnt work, but i should stop over around 3ish. SOOOOOOOOOOO
that about noon, im dead asleep and my cell phone goes off... Guess whoooo?
Erica and i decide that we'll just meet at the mall and go to state street (a mile long stretch of shops and restaurants by the UW-Madison campus.) I drove down there and later found out that once again, she brought her sister with.. now i have nothing against her sister, but i had a bunch of stupid relationship crap to talk to Erica about that i couldnt talk about with her sis around so i thought, great....
I got there and we chilled around the mall for a little while and then drove down to state street. Then we drove to East Towne, went to the mall, then went to Fazolli's. About 7 o'clock or so, we're finishing up eating and I'm in a crabby mood cause I didnt get to talk to Erica about any of it. I didnt want to ruin the day so i figured i would try to get her to hang out with me for a bit longer. I suggested a movie....
She was cool with it!! w00t... and even better.... she suggested we take her sister back home first... day = 10x better now.
We take her back, she changes and we leave for the theater. We get there about 8:45ish and we think about movies to see. I suggest High Tension, knowing its not only a horror flick which means she gets closer to me, but i know she's a really jumpy girl and gets freaked out by stuff real easily. She buys her ticket and we sit down on a bench waiting for the movie to get done playing so we can go in and sit down (we were 45min early so we had to wait the last to finish.)
So we get in there and already i know she's gonna get close to me. As the movie gets going she gets closer. she goes from grabbing onto my arm to hiding her eyes on my shoulder to holding my hand... ok... squeezing the hell out of my hand, to basically curling up into a little ball literally right on top of me.
As we leave the theatre, she's holding onto my hand and as we get into the car, she's still holding on, although its really nothing more than because she's freaked out. The movie got out at 1130ish and i really was enjoying the night, so i didnt want it to end. i suggest we drive around for awhile, and as i had hoped, she was down with that. We then, out of nowhere, decided to drive to State Street. We park in the parking garage i always park at on the loop and as we get out of the car and walk out, she's still holding onto my hand. Now its really starting to feel like its something beyond just a security thing...
We walk around state street for awhile and she's still holding my hand...grrr.. im so confused.. but happy!
We then walk onto the UW-Madison campus, which is located pretty much right at the end of state street. We walk around for awhile, StiLL holding hands, and i decide to take her to this garden thing with a pond and gazeebo. She works at a flower shop so i knew she'd like it...
We get there and look at everything and sit down in the gazeebo. After sitting there for a few min she puts my arm around her.. whoa guys.... its just got sooo much deeper. Now its not like i've never had my arm around a girl before, but since i've been wishing this would happen for 2.5 years, just to come to the realization that we're nothing more than friends and never will be more (or so it seemed) this is a big thing.
So we walk around some more... actually.. for hours. hahah..
anyway that was last thursday. we've hung out almost all day, everyday since then except today because she had to work, etc. AAAND we're hangin out tomorrow too.
We talked a lot about it and we still feel kind of confused about how this all happened but the thing is we disagree on a lot but connect SOO much better than i ever have with anyone. It feels so weird but we're in love. thing is, in two months im moving even farther away from her to milwaukee for college so im worried that that is going to split us up.. i dono
thoughts? :wtf: |
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| D-res |
| quote: | Originally posted by Nou
I am all for the long posts, done a few in my time... but son.
Summerize for those vaguely interested? |
haha
i went out with this chick like 2 and a half years ago. basically fell in love with her, but then she broke up with me. I've constantly tried to fill the void but never have.
now, out of nowhere, we hooked back up.
that was easy. :stongue: |
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| idoru |
| So, I actually read the whole thing. :wtf: That's pretty cool, actually. Now if only I could find a girl... |
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| jonSun |
| OK, its nice to see your happy. This chick obviously means alot to you. But please take my advice. Your Young. Dont get wrapped up with any girls. If you think she is your first love your wrong. You will truly find what love is when your older. I thought I was in love at 16, when I really wasnt, i was infactuated. I then found true love at age 21. Dont waste too much time with girls. Still waste time, but not too much time . There are so many women out there & there are probably millions of perfect ones. At your age just Date, but dont get into long relationships where some chick is gonna make you weep for years. Set a time limit on relationships & try & get your dick wet as much as possible.;) |
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| D-res |
| quote: | Originally posted by jonSun
OK, its nice to see your happy. This chick obviously means alot to you. But please take my advice. Your Young. Dont get wrapped up with any girls. If you think she is your first love your wrong. You will truly find what love is when your older. I thought I was in love at 16, when I really wasnt, i was infactuated. I then found true love at age 21. Dont waste too much time with girls. Still waste time, but not too much time . There are so many women out there & there are probably millions of perfect ones. At your age just Date, but dont get into long relationships where some chick is gonna make you weep for years. Set a time limit on relationships & try & get your dick wet as much as possible.;) |
hahah.. nah dude.. she was my first back a couple years ago and i just never got over her. i always wanted her back but it never felt like it would happen. never thought in my wildest dreams i would.
now i know the difference between love and infatuation. i've been infatuated many times before but this just feels SO right.
i know theres a few instances where people get together in High school and stay together forever but those happen very rarely. not saying this is it, because to say the least, i dont wanna be held down in college. theres 15,000 female students at the school im going to that id love to get to know but still like... this girl makes me so happy.
i've been with her for the past 6 days and i miss her so much and whatnot..
theres so much more i could say but im just gonna save you all the time ;) |
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| M@t |
| quote: | Originally posted by jonSun
OK, its nice to see your happy. This chick obviously means alot to you. But please take my advice. Your Young. Dont get wrapped up with any girls. If you think she is your first love your wrong. You will truly find what love is when your older. I thought I was in love at 16, when I really wasnt, i was infactuated. I then found true love at age 21. Dont waste too much time with girls. Still waste time, but not too much time . There are so many women out there & there are probably millions of perfect ones. At your age just Date, but dont get into long relationships where some chick is gonna make you weep for years. Set a time limit on relationships & try & get your dick wet as much as possible.;) |
What holds true for you is not necessarily aplicable to him
I know people who got together at 16 and are married now
I know people who married there first girlfriend |
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| jonSun |
| quote: | Originally posted by M@t
I know people who married there first girlfriend |
Damn, sucks to be them.:stongue: :p |
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| wwu.punisher |
D-res... dude... this will bite you in the ass.
I did the EXACT SAME THING with a girl. Dated for two years, then broke up by my own decision. Got back together with her SIX TIMES before I finally realized that I was being a dolt.
Don't get sucked in, man. You will find yourself lost in a cycle. |
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| Jocker |
| quote: | Originally posted by wwu.punisher
D-res... dude... this will bite you in the ass.
I did the EXACT SAME THING with a girl. Dated for two years, then broke up by my own decision. Got back together with her SIX TIMES before I finally realized that I was being a dolt.
Don't get sucked in, man. You will find yourself lost in a cycle. |
exactly...
most guys feel uncomfortable being out of relationship. they will reminisce and have nostalgic feelings about the "lost love". they will block out all the bad things and they've basically broke up because of, and they'll remember only good things/days/words, etc...
in other words, they will idealize.
where, in fact, neither she nor you have changed to better any single bit. and the same will reoccur again, just as soon as you go through the first outburst of lust.
moreover, i know you think that this is all bull and that your case is different, bla bla bla... but, guess what, this world is pretty ing old, and, believe it or not, billions of people have been through this already for billions of times, and in 99.999% of cases the outcome is the same.
so we're basically waiting for your post a month or 3 months from now, to tell us how stupid you were to get back together in the first place. |
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| tranceprincess |
| I thought you said you didn't hook up with a girl ! I mean I don't care anymore for I cried all the tears already for you. I hated that, for I never cry over a guy. Your not worth it. You could have at least told me the truth. Gosh you bring yourself forth as such a sweet guy or whatever but you are just as bad as the others. goodbye... |
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| Michael19 |
only read the first few paragraghs.
Prediction:
For here to walk all over you and treat like a doormat all over again.
Enjoy.
In prision you would be known as "the bitch". |
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| D-res |
| quote: | Originally posted by Jocker
exactly...
most guys feel uncomfortable being out of relationship. they will reminisce and have nostalgic feelings about the "lost love". they will block out all the bad things and they've basically broke up because of, and they'll remember only good things/days/words, etc...
in other words, they will idealize.
where, in fact, neither she nor you have changed to better any single bit. and the same will reoccur again, just as soon as you go through the first outburst of lust.
moreover, i know you think that this is all bull and that your case is different, bla bla bla... but, guess what, this world is pretty ing old, and, believe it or not, billions of people have been through this already for billions of times, and in 99.999% of cases the outcome is the same.
so we're basically waiting for your post a month or 3 months from now, to tell us how stupid you were to get back together in the first place. |
yeah yeah yeah... thing is, we have both changed a lot to better ourselves since then, mostly due to the fact taht we've matured a lot. then i was just a stupid 15 year old guy but now i've grown up and matured quite a bit. im on my way to college. she was naive 14 year old girl, but now she's 17 and going to be a senior in HS. i know we're still young and naive, with a lot to learn but yeah.
in fact, her liking to party and drink used to bother me a LOT but now, i do it too, so its one less thing to bug me. in reality, that was the biggest thing that pushed us apart.
whatever... i'll stop. i need to clean although if i have time, i'll waste more of your lives explaining this situation and whatnot.
| quote: | Originally posted by tranceprincess
I thought you said you didn't hook up with a girl ! I mean I don't care anymore for I cried all the tears already for you. I hated that, for I never cry over a guy. Your not worth it. You could have at least told me the truth. Gosh you bring yourself forth as such a sweet guy or whatever but you are just as bad as the others. goodbye... |
whoa wtf... ok yeah. well basically considering how it hurt you i figured i would try to save you the drama and just tell you nothing happened. besides, this is kind of what happened with jorden. it was out of nowhere. |
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