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Getting touchy feely is good for relationships?
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| EvilTree |
http://www.canada.com/topics/lifest...472a9f8&k=29756
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Massage connects couples
Spouses come to class looking for pain relief but find a new way to communicate
Chris Zdeb, The Edmonton Journal
Published: Monday, February 13, 2006
EDMONTON -- There are classes that are good, classes that are interesting, but few that are rated as "better than sex" by the students taking them.
Anne Mageau chuckles, remembering the high praise she once got for the couples massage course she teaches at Metro Community College.
It's the power of touch.
"Touch is fundamental to human existence," says the doctor of natural medicine and registered massage therapist. It's a fact borne out by many research studies, including a famous one involving orphans in India who died even though they received food and shelter, because caregivers were too short staffed to spend time holding them.
"They died of touch deprivation and what they call failure to thrive," Mageau says.
Many of the couples who take her class to relieve the tensions and stresses of daily life or the aches and pains of an old injury are surprised when massage not only makes them feel better physically, it makes their relationship better as well.
Some even come back for a refresher course after a year or two.
"They say we kept up the massage for awhile and it was really good for us because 'he's not much of a talker,' or 'she's not much of a talker,' and so therefore they communicate through touch," Mageau says.
"Nurturing touch is very important for our soul and for our emotional heart, something that often can be lacking in a relationship."
Public awareness of the health benefits of massage has jumped in the last three years in a changing social climate where less and less the term conjures up images of escorts, Mageau says. It's now not only acceptable to have a massage, it's almost a necessity to work out the effects of today's stress. Her class, for example, is booked up to at least half a year in advance and there's a waiting list.
Couples, who need onlybto bring bed sheets and their own unscented massage oil to class, initially feel a little high school awkwardness when they find themselves half dressed in a darkened room with half a dozen other couples.
But you quickly forget that there are other people around says Karol Clark, who took a recent class with husband Doug Woolgar. "You just relax and go into another world."
Clark says she didn't even blink an eye when her guy came home one day with a massage table he'd seen at Costco and suggested they take a massage course together.
"We've talked about how we have to make sure that we spend time together, and I saw it as another way to do that," Clark says.
The class wasn't a sexual thing, she adds. Everyone is an adult and is there with a partner, "You're not scoping anybody so it's very comfortable," Clark says. "It was very much hands-on communication and being aware of Doug. That was the basic thing."
Plus there's the benefit of being moisturized with massage oil during the driest time of the year. And the fact that they now both know how to give each other a 75-minute, full-body massage is really going to come in handy for all the sore muscles that will come with landscaping the yard of the home they recently moved into.
Monique Devlin and husband Dave Herasymiuk took the couples massage class as part of an early Valentine's Day celebration -- the couple will be apart on the actual day -- that also included dinner out with friends and spending the night at a bed a breakfast.
"We've both done massages for each other, usually while lying on the couch watching TV," Devlin says. "It's just nice to develop and improve those skills.
Massage is a together thing, a sensual thing that we can do together. It's just sort of a part of our relationship, like holding hands."
You might think that getting a massage is much better than having to give one, but Mageau says sometimes during a class someone will blurt out that they're actually enjoying working on their partner.
And when someone falls asleep on a massage table under their partner's touch, she tells them they're doing a great job, "because (their being able to fall asleep) is the ultimate compliment," Mageau says.
[email protected]
© The Edmonton Journal 2006
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| bourgeois |
| touch is very important. i love getting giving and receiving massage's. also a big fan when girls just rub my back and play with my hair, a big fan. |
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| Euphorica |
| quote: | Originally posted by bourgeois
also a big fan when girls just rub my back and play with my hair, a big fan. |
Your welcome,
anytime man, anytime! |
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| EvilTree |
| quote: | Originally posted by Euphorica
Your welcome,
anytime man, anytime! |
Oh boy |
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| Jem_hadar |
| physical contact/touch is good, comforting, pleasing. |
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| *~LiSa-LoO~* |
| I don't know about ya'll but I'm a very touchy feely person :) I love hugs and such!! |
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| VERTiG0 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Euphorica
Your welcome,
anytime man, anytime! |
HAHAHAHAHAHAH HOLY THAT IS HILARIOUS
But yeah, I'm gonna second what Carl said. It is awesome. |
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| Jem_hadar |
| quote: | Originally posted by *~LiSa-LoO~*
I don't know about ya'll but I'm a very touchy feeling person :) I love hugs!! |
I am too. I love my belly touches and head pats (and breast pokes).
Maybe that's why we get alone so get! :)
JeLi FTW! |
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| ghetto_fab |
| quote: | Originally posted by *~LiSa-LoO~*
I don't know about ya'll but I'm a very touchy feely person :) I love hugs and such!! |
Hugs and kisses are the way to go. nothing better then that!!!!!!!! hint hint to the ladies!!!! i love kisses:P hahahahh |
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| marcusus |
Of course it's good for relationships...
Hell, it's how you start most of them in the first place... |
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| *~LiSa-LoO~* |
| quote: | Originally posted by marcusus
Of course it's good for relationships...
Hell, it's how you start most of them in the first place... |
I'm like that in almost all of my friendships as well though :) |
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| marcusus |
| quote: | Originally posted by *~LiSa-LoO~*
I'm like that in almost all of my friendships as well though :) |
I was using relationships in an all encompassing way as well. Generally you shake someone's hand (or a hug) when you meet someone. As you get to know them, regardless of what type of relationship, be it friendly or romantic, you'll still be touching more eg pats on the backs, play fighting and whatnot in a friendly relationship, and of course your more standard kissy kissy huggy huggy humpy humpy with a romantic one. |
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