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I Am Scared Outta My Mind (pg. 4)
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| Viceroy |
Prayers are with you buddy....keep your chin up.
Peace,
Steve |
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| tiesto14 |
to Trancewave.....I never thought something like this could happen to me.,,...i never thought i would have to be in fear of HIV....but now i find myself trying show some fortitude but its not working........thanks for your thoughts and prayers...they mean more then you will EVER fathom....you are right that it makes you look at things entirely different.....alot of people here know me for my bold posts on topics such as war and religion and the such...now its ironic that i am the one who is praying to God and watching TV and thinking life is too short for all this nonsense between countriies...(i still think however that the U.S. efforts in Afghanisatn is good...i wont go that far).....
but i see myself looking at things different already and i just got tested yesterday....its weird....very hard to explain what i am talking about...its just everything seems better, everything seems to have good in it.....i cant explain what i mean.,..i think you have to be me to understand..i am weird..LOL....
That goes for everyone that posted....when this thread is finished i am printing it out and saving it in my memory box forever...it means that much to me....
Viceroy and Bick....thanks for you posts...i appreciate each and everyone that i see...
only 5 or 6 days to go till i know...hopefully 5 days if they come back early.............. |
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| da_MynDLesS_one |
I really feel for you Tiesto14, and I'm sure that I would be just as afraid as you are right now, if not much worse... I've gotta give you all the respect in the world for being strong and brave enough to come out and talk about it openly with the rest of TA... being able to talk about it with others is a major step to thinking positively...
And I hope you know that you couldnt've picked a better group of people to share this personal experience with... the people here at TA are great, always have been and always will be. I guess that's why everyone here is so close :)
With that being said, now let's all toast to the day that Tiesto14's test results come back negative! :D
We're all here for ya, bud... |
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| tiesto14 |
to da_MynDLesS_one.....
you know i didnt even think twice about posting what was happening to me here....after the way people helped me with the break up of this girl..i KNEW that i would get help again....thats just the type of people we all are...and thats rare...
But its easier to post your getting tested then posting your positive...if i am.....but i know i will post the results regardless of what they are.....if its negative you will all know right away but if its positive i think i will be too ed up to post untill i gather my emitions...i am sure you all know what i mean...but they will no matter what be posted.....
thanks for the toast.....beleive when i go out drinking tomorrow night and get REALLY messed up with my friends i will have like 100 toasts for all you guys.... |
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| QuickStep |
I've created and project for myself for you man. I would of replyed earlier, but my computer was out of commision today.
Thank you for sharing your life with a group of stangers, that makes me feel very special that the people I've met on this board can become such trusting friends. I also want to to say congrats for evryone for giving your support.
tiesto14, there's not much I can say that will make the waiting any easier. I think everyone has made some great suggestions and giving some great ideas. So keep your head up, life throws us many curveballs. But we all endure. Sometines it will seem near impossible, but we as people have triumph.:cool:
Through out my life, I realize everything happens for a reason. We just have to put the broken pieces together and find the reason. Have hope in your heart and you will find yourself at the end of this.
You're in my prayers m8.
PAyce |
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| -+DjStylez+- |
Damn!!! Sorry to hear that... I'll say a special prayer for you Tiesto14 .. 4 realz. I had the "EXACT" same thing happen to me not too long ago. I wanted to kill her...even though she was my greatest love. Thank goodness I didn't.... the tests came back negative. And I've learned to forgive her for what she did & put me through. But just a quick observation!!! Is it just me...or does it seem that girls nowadays are just as bad..if not worse...then guys? Almost every guy I speak to tells me their girl broke up with them...cheated on them...doesn't want to settle down, or something like that. It's like the roles have reveresed! I find that it's the guys who are looking for that special girl to settle down with, lately.
Sorry if I went off topic there....I really do feel your pain...and "KNow" what u're going through...and what u're feeling. God bless, and take care.
Keep us posted. :sadgreen: |
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| SYNthSRI |
| quote: | Originally posted by tiesto14
but i see myself looking at things different already and i just got tested yesterday....its weird....very hard to explain what i am talking about...its just everything seems better, everything seems to have good in it.....i cant explain what i mean.,..i think you have to be me to understand..i am weird..LOL....
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nah dude..not weird -- normal.
You are doing the best you can to cope with the circumstances you are in...
A while back...way back, I took a long walk for about 14 hours long -- just walked -- when I got back felt that way. Just saw things in a diff. 'light' for a while -- dunno if THAT makes any sense.
Enjoy the night of getting hammered :D
(oh yea..don't wear a watch!) |
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| Fir3start3r |
Wow....I mean really....wow....
I'm not going to even start to pretend that I know what you're going through.
I will say this though, worrying about things can actually perpetuate problems.
Yes, it is serious but at the same time; you are not DEAD.
I always, always have a small saying for myself when a harsh situtation comes up:
"If there isn't a white chalk line around your body, today's a GREAT day!"
You'll be amazed how much that puts things into perspective (for me at least).
My hopes and prayers go out to you. I believe that you'll be just fine! :D
(I'll dance my ass of at Ferry Corsten for ya, how's that? :stongue: )
Take care,
Jeff |
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| RTP |
This is really very, very sad to hear :( ... but you have to keep your head up!
Don't get too depressed now. I know this is very easy said, but at the end it all comes back to you. Maybe it can help you when you do something crazy that you always wanted to do in your life but couldn't! For example parachuing or something else you never did and always wanted to do (this should not mean that you should let yourself run over by a car, don't get me wrong...)! I know that sounds odd but think about it! I'm not very good in comforting people, but I hope U got that right ;) :)
The worst mistake people in your situation can make is sitting at home, being sad, not talking to others, thinking about the worst that could happen and letting the world go by (I know U don't do that now, but lemme say it). Hey, Tiesto14, you are still alive, don't forget that! It could be really good for U when U visit friends, parents and other people U love - like the oher TAs told U to.
Don't be too depressed ... I know that this is hard, sure it's even harder than I can imagine, but try to! That should not mean that you should rave off yer ass now and forget about all ... it's okay that you can't wait for the results and think about how they will be. But don't let it come too much over! You said in a post above that you got already headache and such things and that causes me worry about U ... :(
I hope your results will be negative (u know ... negative for HIV, but positive for U ;) ) ... good luck :) !
And btw: I admire your courage to post this horrible thing! I hope it will make other TAs also thinking about what it is to be HIV-negative...
Good luck, Tiesto14! |
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| DJ RozzeR |
I just want to say that your message friend has probabily caused 100's of people to think of what they are doing when they meet new girls or men , therefore you are a Saviour, every-time i meet a new girl and i dont have nothing on me i aint gonna her , she can suck rock. There is nothing i can say to change the way you think or feel because I am not God , the only way out of this is to play by the Rules these Rules are the Rules of GOD, If the Devil is looking upon you on that day my friend then fate will decide. Im sure you have all the proffesional advice from the doctor , and councilling , im sure TA are thinking about you.
Keep your head up son , the world is pure evil , and so is your x.
Over and Out ... |
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| tiesto14 |
to QuickStep
...hey i was wondering where you where....i am glad you responded...thanks....whats your Project Hope all about?....sounds interesting...thank you for your prayers....
to -+DjStylez+-
.....I agree alot of my friends have been looking for a good girl to love and have a commited relationship with lateley...but I aswell as them keep getting screwed over.....one day we will all find that certain someone...I HOPE....thnaks for your thoughts...
to SYNthSRI...i know exactley what u mean about your walk..i had one of those a couple years ago...they give you a sense of freedom or something...you know what i mean...you cant explain in words..its too stong of an emotion....SYNthSRI i am taking 2 shots of Black Haus for you tonight....
to Fir3start3r
.......i like your quote..i have a similar one and it goes like this....
"Tomorrow is not promised....Today is your present"....
to RTP...i am trying to stay calm and but like you said its hard....last night i had sever bad dreams and seems like the thoughts of the test coming back positive wont leave my mind...but soon i will know and then i will see how i will run my life depending on the results..
to DJ RozzeR....i never thought this could happen....i was in a commited relationship then SHE cheats on me...i could not even imagine she would of done such a thing but she did and now i have to deal.....but beleive i will not have sex with another girl again without a condom....i will wait to do that for when i get married....
thanks for your prayers... |
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| mellankali |
hey-
i just came across your post today, and i just wanted to drop a line. seeing how i've been rather inactive in my postings, and i haven't been around here much, i just wanted you to know that although i have no capability to imagine what you are feeling right now, i'm with you. i've been through the whole girlfriend thing before, and i know how that feels, i'm still living in it. the hiv thing though, i can't imagine. i just want you to know that like everybody else on here said, you have the support of thousands, including me. keep your head up, thats the best advice i can give. and althought my life has changed so much with my girl leaving me, the music is still there, which i turn to for support. something i find inspirational would be this:
Life is too short, dont stress everyday, leave your worries behind, go out and play.
Life is too short, grasp it in your hand, a natural miracle, have fun while you can.
Life is too short, as precious as gold, full of suprises, so i'm told.
Life is too short, take it from me, have as much as fun as you wish, just wait and see.
Life is too short, you'll soon to forget, that life is a gift, and its free yes thats it.
Life is too short, use your own eyes, open yourself, and enjoy you own life.
and while i find it doesn't help to soothe every situation, i think that a message still is there for me; and maybe for you :conf:
stay strong, my thoughts are there.
jesse |
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