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Overheard conversations in NYC :rofl: (pg. 3)
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| AndreaCKY772 |
"Woman on cell: Why does he always do that? He just stopped in the middle of the street, looked me straight in the eyes, and took a giant, steamy dump.
--5th St & Ave A"
honestly, wtf? i'mm thinking the first sentence HAS to be talking about someone else previously mentioned!
"Father: Look at this -- the bottle is sweating!
Six-year-old girl: It's condensation, Dad.
--Shea Stadium"
"Hobo #1: Bitches is crazy, crazy. Had no choice but to that squirrel.
Hobo #2: Nooo, nooo.
Hobo #1: Yup, yup. That squirrel was worth five cents.
Hobo #2: Nooo, I'll tell you how much that squirrel was worth. $15.98.
--St. Johns Pl, Park Slope"
"Lady: It's freezing out. Is the weather cold like this in Korea? [Manicurist is silent.] Hello? Is it this cold in Korea? ... Does she speak English?
Manicurist: I'm Chinese.
Lady: Oh, well, I eat a lot of Chinese vegetables.
--Nail salon, Queens"
sooooooo ignorant.... |
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| lim f(x) = f(a) |
| quote: | Conductor: This is an express, uptown C train. You heard right: an express C train. Next stop: 125th Street. If you need local service on the Upper West Side, please transfer across the platform to the D, as in "Daddy done did it" or B, as in "bad boy Bobby Brown" train.
--C train, 59th St
Conductor: This is a Brooklyn bound B train. Like bitch.
--B train
Conductor: We are currently being held in the station because of some other A train ing us all over.
--Uptown A train
Overheard by: la di da
Conductor: Never give up on life. Keep hope alive. This is 30th Avenue. |
LOL |
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| lücid |
| quote: | Originally posted by AndreaCKY772
sooooooo ignorant.... |
Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn't know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It's not a burqa, it's a poncho. I'm Jewish. It's for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx. |
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| Lira |
| quote: | Originally posted by lücid
Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn't know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It's not a burqa, it's a poncho. I'm Jewish. It's for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx. |
:stongue: :stongue: :stongue: |
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| AndreaCKY772 |
| quote: | Originally posted by lücid
Older woman: Excuse me, miss?
Younger woman: Yeah?
Older woman: Your veil, your burqa is very beautiful. I didn't know your people were allowed to wear it in bright colors.
Younger woman: It's not a burqa, it's a poncho. I'm Jewish. It's for the rain. I got it at TJ Maxx. |
smh |
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| lim f(x) = f(a) |
| quote: | Hey, Man, Where Do You Think Families Come From?
Young woman #1: Guys never want to eat me out.
Middle-aged dad with kids: Hey, we're trying to eat over here.
Young woman #1: See, even hearing about it freaks them out.
Young man at next table: Maybe I can take a look for you and give you my assessment.
Middle-aged dad with kids: For God's sake, this is a family restaurant!
Young woman #2: You have a very controversial vagina. |
jesus lol |
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| dj tek |
back in the days....
me : hops the turnstyle in the subway station
worker in the booth on the mic : pay your fare pay your fare pay your fare
me : runs down to catch the F. |
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| Mr.Mystery |
Oh man, I'd forgotten all about this place :stongue:
Mom: Are you okay in there, sweetie?
Little girl in stall: I can't button my pants.
Mom: It's alright. Just come on out.
Little girl in stall: And I pooped on the floor. |
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| Omega_M |
Girl on cell: I love you. I do. I love you more than weed. Do you believe me? You know how much I love weed, right? Well, I love you more... If you had the choice between me and a rock, what would you choose? Me, I love you more than weed. I really do.
Oh man, this site is mint. :stongue: |
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| verndogs |
| quote: | Guy: I was seeing her for a while, but it just wasn't working out. I guess I'm not over Jessica.
Girl: What?
Guy: What do you mean, what?
Girl: I thought you were gay.
Guy: Oh, because I'm a hairdresser. How original. Just because I'm a hairdresser you think I'm gay.
Girl: No. I thought you were gay because when I stayed at your house four years ago I woke up and saw you ing Matt in the ass!
Guy: Oh my God. Matt and I have never talked about that night. |
:stongue: :stongue: |
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| verndogs |
| quote: | Little girl in sushi restaurant: Hey! Guess what? I just farted!
Mom and dad ignore her.
Little girl: I said I just farted! And I farted big! Ewwww! And it smells like rotten eggs! Wanna smell?
Little girl lets one rip.
Mother to father: So how was your day? |
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