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Honest opinion on a production of mine....
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| DjStephenWiley |
I always find it hard to get true feedback from others. I always feel like my friends are "yes men" for some reason. I'm going to post a track I recently did that has received support from some modest DJ's but please do not let that interfere with your personal opinion. I'm concerned about composition and your overall thoughts, not mixing and mastering (unless you hear something crazy)
Please, be honest. If its cheesy commercial garbage trash then say so. I created the track with one thing in mind and that was to create a commercial sound and blend it with some 90's elements because it was supposed to go to Perfecto and they passed on it (and ironically paul won't stop playing it).
I took some samples from the late 90's and used them as some building blocks to the track to help with this, with the most notable being the alarm type sound that I pulled from "Tekknova - Last Trip To Paradise"
Anyways, don't hold back negative (or positive) comments.
Thanks a ton in advance for your time. The track is the first in the player and is called Frustration.
http://www.myspace.com/djstephenwiley
THANK YOU!!! |
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| Kysora |
| quote: | Originally posted by DjStephenWiley
I created the track with one thing in mind and that was to create a commercial sound and blend it with some 90's elements |
If that was your intention then you were spot on.
The melody that comes in at around 3:40 probably could have been brought out a bit more.. would have liked to see something like that introduced earlier, too, if it could have worked in the composition, and overall just given a bit more focus in the track. It's simple but it kind of glued everything in the track together while it was playing.
It does sound rather commercial but I wouldn't call it generic or anything, though some of the vocal samples were a bit cheesy. They fit the track well enough though. |
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| RichieV |
feel like the bass is a bit muddy and clashing with the kick. I would cut some mids and double it with something higher and add some reverb to the 2 octave higher part. You do double it later on but it sounds weird alone at the beginning. The breakdown is a little empty. Maybe some reverse reverb, delay , chorus to fill the void. That short arpegiatted synth in the break is nice and I think you should bring that out more. That counter melody that comes in after the main chorus in the drop is neat but I would of foreshadowed it in the build at the beginning of the trck. The chordal synths , when they do the 16th notes, maybe shorten the tail. A listen to the synths overall , they sound dull and could use some mid highs.
Great work overall. I think the breakdown is the weakest part. It is one of those tracks that needs a really wet breakdown and it isn't there. The vocals sound great and the performance is spot on.Great recording on that. That sound effect that sounds like a ghost doing a pitch bend fits well. Sounds oldschool.
took a listen to Summersault. That track could have some great potential. I feel like the groove just needs to be more funky with a stronger back beat on 2 and 4 and it could be super groovin.
You've improved alot since my last listen a year ago. Congrats !!! |
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| BshidoHEAT |
Good stuff Stephen, I like this track!
The only thing I could say has already been said with the melody around 3:40. Can't say much about anything else, since I'm listening on my laptop speakers. But you were going for that 90's sound, you achieved it. I also like the singer, nice voice. |
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| Eric J |
First off, overall I like the track in general. I think more could be done with it, but its not bad.
I don't like the hats at all, but that's just a personal thing, I've really been avoiding open hats in large doses the past year or so. I feel like if you killed the open hats and replaced them with a more tech-y closed hat it would fit the track better. Also, the drums are very static, no real groove, just very straightforward and quantized feel. Some elements to add "counter-groove" and movement would help alot. Do not underestimate adding things that are barely audible, but add to the "shuffle" and "feel" of the drums.
The track could definitely use more effects just to fill things out. The build up needs to have more of a build up, just that one synth with the filter opening up is not enough, you might want to consider more of a tech house type build up. Don't like that near silence after the build up.
I agree with Richie that the bass definitely needs some work. If the track is to be bass-driven, then the bass needs to be more prominent, otherwise you may want to layer it a bit to give it more weight in the mid-bass range. It just seems flat. |
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| Subtle |
| I like the old school sound feel this track has, nice hook and stuff. |
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| Owsey2008 |
| quote: | Originally posted by RichieV
That sound effect that sounds like a ghost doing a pitch bend fits well. Sounds oldschool.
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I've heard this sound in quite a few tracks. How did you achieve it?
Anyway, pretty solid track. It kept my interest for sure.
However, there are some elements that I don't think fit very well. As Eric said - the hats. I can't quite put my tongue on what it is I don't like about them, though.
Another thing I didn't like was when the vocals layer on top of each other, so you hear the "whispery" vocal on top of the singing.
But I enjoyed it! |
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| TranceLover007 |
Hey Stephen,
Love some part of this track man, a spatially 3:06 which remind me of late 80's - bit of Modern Talking, Sandra and CC Catch - really nice. This idea (musically/melodically speaking) has so much flexibility/opportunity build in into it that a lot of producers would love to have that play in they own tracks.
So let's start with this - you have a lots of room in your frequencies to introduce new attractive/emotional/atmospheric sound/s - pads, arps, ..... . Spice-up your track with nice FX which can sweeps throughout you song - this is what will help you connect with people.
Try to change this open hats (like Eric J said) - doesn't fit/sound well.
Make your drums more active (like Eric J said) - they can play with/change different patterns.
I really like you bass (simple is a beauty), although I would make them (at last in some part of this track) more active as well (typical late 80's and 90's sound).
I would want to work on atmospheric part of your song/composition, you need to try connect/interact with emotional side of your listeners, make them/wont them to listen to your track one more time, and more, and more, ..... .
This is only my opinion and reflect only my view on the music.
Overall nice work and definitively great start man.
Cheers |
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| Subtle |
| I dont think you should change anything, its the imperfection of older tracks that made them so good, and this one does sound like something thats 10 years old. |
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| Kysora |
| quote: | Originally posted by Subtle
this one does sound like something thats 10 years old. |
That's a good point, it really does sound that way |
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| msz |
hey stephen ;}
everything sounds like its good in this production to me.
i feel like you should make a radio edit for this with it. it could work in pop, and be very successful. And, I'd assume a ton of trance jocks could play this no? did you sample the kick from a track? a serious professional effort in my eyes. cheers. |
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| EddieZilker |
| Sounds like something Y2K Kimball Collins would play. It was really, really well done, but I thought it could use some more finesse and that it also lacked a voice or a signature. |
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