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The Movie Reviews Thread
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| Esiotrat |
Hey guys,
I Search'd and didn't find any threads dedicated to reviewing movies, and the Movie Recommendations thread doesn't count because, well.. it's for recommendations.
So this is a thread for reviewing movies, new or old movies- it doesn't matter.
Here are the rules:
You can only post reviews. You can of course point out factual mistakes in a review, preferably though you should try and make your reply in the form of your own review, to keep things smooth.
You must post the name of the movie you're reviewing at the top of your post. Feel free to include other information too if you can, although it isn't mandatory; such as when it was made, the producer, star, whether or not it was a remake and so forth.
You can make your reviews as long as you'd like, and since you've put the title at the top of your post you can also feel free to put in any spoilers of the movie you'd like.
Okies, toodleoo. |
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| djhaziel |
Nice I'll be back to review my fav movie of ALL TIME ...lol
The Clockwork Orange :cool: |
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| Adam420 |
| Would there be any interest in anime review reviews? I watched One Piece movie 10 last night and figure I can write a small review. |
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| Esiotrat |
| quote: | Originally posted by Adam420
Would there be any interest in anime review reviews? I watched One Piece movie 10 last night and figure I can write a small review. |
Sure, I don't see why not. There are quite a few Anime fans on TA. |
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| djhaziel |
| quote: | Originally posted by Adam420
Would there be any interest in anime review reviews? I watched One Piece movie 10 last night and figure I can write a small review. |
yes anime ftw ... I use to be very much into them ... I can always use some new recommendations on them |
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| couch-potato |
| TETSUOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO |
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| SuspicionVandit |
I accidentally drop my cigarrete. I rarely ever do smoke, but as with almost every occasion that I do, I am clumsy with my clutch. I bend down and out of the corner of my eye, I see 2 long legs of panty hose followed by a black skirt, then an oversized jacket- possibly belonging to her date. Definitely much too bi...
I get a nudge on my shoulder. Mrs SuspicionVandit. I don't want to blush, but yes, she's caught me.
"Oh look, Big Macs come with a 44 ounce for only 44 cents."
not a good save
And with that, I learned to respect Christopher Nolan for his mastery. For now, for the life of me, I was never able to pinpoint the time to when my reality ended, and I entered the world of Nolan's for his film, Inception.
Even now, I wake up with the thought, am I still in the cinema? Am I still in that world? Where does my reality lay?
To be honest, I don't know if I can responsibly review Inception by Christopher Nolan because of several inaccuracies I have in my recollection. Somehow, the film blended my dreams, my perception of reality, my fantasies and it's own environment to create a grand higher level of consciousness never achievable by cinema.
I know that me and my wife were in line for the film when I dropped my cigarette. That was my world. But whenever did Leonardo did sleep? Did I sleep? Am I awake? Why would I awaken? If I never die, how can I truly believe I've never escaped a sublevel of my dreams? |
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| Esiotrat |
Dancer in the Dark
This movie is so many kinds of insane that only a computer could count them.
The story is about a woman named Selma (ha!), played by Bjork, who is struggling to keep a living and bring up her son. She has a few acquaintances and has families that give her support, but she doesn't have enough to even afford her own home. Selma's passion is Hollywood musicals, which are her only mental escape.
The film follows her dealing with a crime that gets out of hand, but is brilliantly depicted through her perspective. It strays off into Selma's mind, and everything turns into a musical number.
Between the musical numbers, however, is the most depressing film I've ever seen. You will bawl like a child leaving Disney World at the end of the day.
I give it 10 out of 10. |
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| Ian |
Final Destination 3 - Last night, some channel here.
mid-range hot canadian girl tries to cheat death. lots of kill scenes, lots of blood, violence and jailbait. And they all died in the end
7/10 |
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| Lira |
| quote: | 10 Lessons from the new Karate Kid
The most amusing thing about the Holy Roman Empire, as Voltaire pointed out, is that it wasn't holy, Roman, or for that matter, an empire. The same can be said about the new film Karate Kid. Firstly, it isn't about Karate - the film takes place in China and they reckoned it would be more sensible to have him learn Kung Fu, like everyone else in the country (lesson #1: Everyone in China knows Kung Fu). Also, it isn't about a kid, but about a spoilt brat who just so happens to be labelled as a kid in more tolerant quarters (lesson #2: American kids are unruly by default). I take "Kung Fu Brat" didn't really sound catchy, so they decided to revamp the old franchise instead. As I'm going to talk about the things I learnt from this film, be aware that the following paragraphs contain spoilers. Lots of them.
The brat moves from Detroit to Beijing with the worst possible attitude: He strangely claims to hate all things China but on his first day in Asia he's smitten with puppy love for the very first girl he seems to spot on the street. I'm serious, I don't think I saw another girl in the film for quite a few minutes after that, and he's head over heels about this (surprise!) shy violinist who spends her days listening to Bach at the park. The pinnacle of discipline, the girl is all about the violin (lesson #3: Thanks to Vanessa Mae, we all know Chinese girls are all about the Violin)... until, that is, she sees our exotic brat get his arse kicked first at basketball, then at ping pong, and - after showing her "his moves" after a guy he just met dared him to - he gets literally beaten up (lesson #1: Everyone in China knows Kung Fu, specially kids). Love at first sight. Also, I was rather puzzled about Jackie Chan's silence in the beginning. At least in Rush Hour, his initial silence was used for comical purposes. Here he's just... creepy.
The fact that he got beaten up so quickly is a very interesting thing in itself. Thanks to the One-Child Policy, I assume, there's been a shortage of girls in China, so it's understandable that the girl this brat fancies is the only girl within a 2-kilometre radio. And, when the other brats notice they're about to lose their only chance to perpetuate the species to this clumsy foreigner, they get all riled up and abuse both the girl (who was innocently listening to Bach) and the brat (should this be lesson #4? They didn't gang up on that other kid, but he apparently didn't talk to the forbidden girl either... I'll just let this one slide). However, they complain she isn't studying the moment she takes the ear buds away from her auditory system and proceed to cleverly throw her score sheets away so she can spend even more time studying as she has to write her music all over again... or something of that sort.
And then something very strange happens. Our cocky and rebel brat suddenly becomes afraid and learns Kung Fu so he can get the girl back. Well, actually, he wants to have just his chances with the girl back, because the most intimate moment they shared was a rather unique one (lesson #4: Chinese girls love curly hair... but I already knew that) and their relationship is virtually non-existent. And, after this eye-opening (and arse-kicking) experience, he suddenly learns there are cool things about China. Such as beating other people up with the powers of Kung Fu. China, tā mā de shì a! So he has Jackie Chan teach him (refer to lesson #1) even though his self-esteem and his delusions of grandeur seem to be intact. Perhaps that should be lesson #5: Americans aren't ever humble. Ever.
Then there's the one strange thing about discipline in this film: whereas the American brat is a rebel without a cause, all the Chinese kids obey everyone uncritically (lesson #6: Discipline is everything unless you're from Detroit). The girl is told to play the violin so she does, no questions asked. When the brat is taught the concept of 物极必反 (Wù Jí Bì Fǎn) our (until then) linguistically impaired anti-hero suddenly grasps the ulterior meaning behind this expression and has some fǎn with the girl (lesson #7: Americans can't learn Chinese, the language itself is a Great Wall). At least, that's what her parents would say. The "fun" moments they shared were a hindrance to her superior music skills, going against (反) all she stands for. Her parents congratulate her for her performance, her teacher leaves the room ashamed, and she breaks up with him. If my daughter had performed poorly in her entrance examination for the Beijing Academy of Music (or, as the brat put it, BAM!), I wouldn't have reacted like that. Oh, and the bullies? They aren't bed. They're just told to wreak havoc whenever possible and leaves them off the hook (refer to lesson #6). It wasn't their idea.
And the film pretty much just develops from this. But the really amusing thing at the end is that thought the brat is an utter newcomer, he beats everyone else at their own game. Not just one kid. Or two. He defeats a phalanx of disciplined and somewhat obsessed fighters who have been practising for years... whereas he had the guidance of Jackie Chan for a much briefer period of time. I think these are lessons #8 and #9: Newcomers always win (specially if they're completely alien to the customs and whatnot) and don't ever doubt the power of people with moustache. What was his family drama all about anyway? Was Jackie Chan supposed to be the father the brat no longer had, and was the brat replacing the deceased child? For a while I thought hell would break loose if the wise handyman got together with the brat's mother in her full ghettoness, but I'm relieved to say that didn't happen. THAT would be a true dragon fight! And, this is it, the end.
The #10 lesson? Make sure you always go to the cinema with good company: though the film is okay, laughing at it is much better. |
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| Boomer187 |
2012
Everybody dies!!!! |
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| Omega_Blue |
scott pilgrim vs the world is a movie solely for nerdy college students and gamer dorks who grew up in the late 80's/90's. taken from the title of brian lee o'malley's second graphic novel in a series of six, it follows the protagonist, scott pilgrim, as he fights his way to the heart of ramona flowers by destroying her seven ex's. while the premise is interesting enough, most people won't like this film unless they are of the video game dork-type as described above.
the graphic novel is actually quite humorous; quirky without being awkward, and even though each edition is over 100-and-some pages, the pace of the book flows well. they tried to translate that pace and quirkiness into the film, but in the end it ended up being awkward to the point of cringing at certain points and felt rushed way too much throughout the picture. obviously, trying to squeeze 7 editions into one film is nearly impossible without losing a healthy amount of the material and subject matter, but those somewhat minor details are what made the graphic novel so enjoyable and fun.
michael cera shouldn't have been cast for this film, either. his static, uninteresting and uninspired role as the timid, socially inept dork is tiring by now, and doesn't fit how scott pilgrim actually is in the literature. he's much more animated and dynamic in brian lee o'malley's original work.
overall, the acting was subpar, with a cast of generally talent-less no-named one-shot actors/actresses who don't act or fit the attitudes and behaviors of their graphic novel counterparts, and the film is riddled with cheesiness instead of charm. for example- one particular moment depicts scott and his friends dance-posing a la space channel 5 for the sega dreamcast, a game so vague and unknown to most of the population that it instead looks like some sort of strange, go-go dancer routine which makes the viewer squirm in his seat from embarassment FOR the actors as he/she tries to find the logic or reasoning behind them doing so in the film. it works in the book due to the creative freedoms of the art form; not so much, however, in a live action film.
the most clever and creative parts are unfortunately the ones that will be lost on the audience if they didn't own a sega genesis or play super mario bros 3 (i'm sure there's one or two sad, pathetic kids out there that had crappy parents like that). and, in the end, too much of the plot and too many character nuances were completely omitted by the film- mainly due to the medium used.
tl;dr: if you like video games, scott pilgrim, or are a dork, then by all means watch this movie. if you're none of the above, avoid this movie like the plague. |
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