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Am I Being Superficial and Shallow? (pg. 2)
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| King of Clubs |
I often get turned off if the girl shows too much interest. I know its silly but the only girls I keep falling for are the ones that make me work hard for their attention. If someone, as you said, wasn't even into trance and starts making tons of questions about your favorite DJ and so on, maybe she just makes you feel to safe about your relationship. These situations make me think "Alright, I can have her, but do I really want to?" and then I start looking for flaws, which you said you did as well.
If this is how you feel, try not to, because it seems like you have found a perfect girl. I say go for it! |
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| tiesto14 |
| quote: | Originally posted by King of Clubs
I often get turned off if the girl shows too much interest. I know its silly but the only girls I keep falling for are the ones that make me work hard for their attention. If someone, as you said, wasn't even into trance and starts making tons of questions about your favorite DJ and so on, maybe she just makes you feel to safe about your relationship. These situations make me think "Alright, I can have her, but do I really want to?" and then I start looking for flaws, which you said you did as well.
If this is how you feel, try not to, because it seems like you have found a perfect girl. I say go for it! |
YES YES YES YES...exactley...thats how i am....u pin pointed it perfectley....
because when i have to fight for a girl i am so focused on getting her i dont look at the flaws...but like u said when a girl shows GREAT interest i tend to be like wait lemme double check if she is what i want..hard to explain but YOU know what i mean.
i think your also right that she is perfect...for me atleast....i have to focus on all the good and not pick and pick at stupid flaws...but it is hard when your mind thinks a certain way.:( |
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| pagoda |
| I think you'd be pretty stupid not to go for it with this girl. Catches like that aren't easy to find, don't give it up easily... |
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| King of Clubs |
| quote: | Originally posted by tiesto14
it is hard when your mind thinks a certain way.:( |
Tell me about it!
Good luck dude, hope things work out for you. |
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| b i n k u n |
you got a really interesting situation here tiesto14...and everyone has been pretty spot-on with their advice.
only thing i have to add is that i've come to realize in many situations where i've gotten more involved with girls that as your inner feelings develop for the girl, you'll realize they become much more attractive then you could've ever imagined.
so i say, try to overlook this one "flaw" and enjoy being with her. cuz y'never know, a day, a week, or a month down the line, you're gonna suddenly realize that she has become the most beautiful girl you've ever known. hehe, sounds sappy, but i can honestly vouch for this. ;) it's a great feeling, cuz you realize that you like the girl not for what she looks like, but honestly for who she is and what she means to you. |
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| SmellsExcellent |
heres my take, and hit me if this has been said cuz i only read the first post...
looks are a part of attraction. dont let people lie about it because its the truth. in most cases, the reason you are initially interested in a person is because of looks. the is a point when someone puts too much emphasis on looks but, honestly, its human nature. don't feel badly about wanting a good lookin girl because its not wrong. also, be honest with yourself. i think you already know what you want/are going to do but you just want some re-assurance. go with it, man, you've asked us and all we really can do is help make things you already know a bit clearer.
cheers,
marc |
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| DormantCulture |
Dude, this chick sounds like a real catch !!!
About the looks, well I think we all are guilty of what u speak off, but in your case, the answer is right in front of you - think about how your stomach sank when she told you what she did, thats a special feeling that only someone that matters can bring out. When you grow together, your paranoir will subside :D :D
If it were me, take a chance, you aint got any better options do you ??? |
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| Warez Guy |
| If everything you say about her is true then go for it man, she seems to make you happy so thats all that should matter. Who cares what your mom or whoever eles will think about her.:) |
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| escee |
yes
this girl sounds pretty great, you would be stupid not to take it further. |
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| InAcoma |
Well she sounds like a really cool chick
i do kinda think that its shallow even tho u see all the inner qualities you are still doubtful on whether or not u should pursue it futher- coz on wat u have said... she isnt like the other girls u dated
well my advice....is forget about the past
and try not to worry, if others dont see her beauty
the most important thing... is that u see her beauty :)
give it a go... u have nothing to loose
and u'll never know, unless you take the next step
:p good luck with it all |
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| Spad |
Mate, please don't take this the wrong way, but it seems to be like a big gameshow where everybody gets to control your life on here sometimes. Sure ask people for advice, but I think the only shallow thing about all this is the fact you are basing your decision on whether or not to go out with this girl on what other people think!
I'm sure she'd be well chuffed to know that. |
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| Sand Leaper |
| quote: | originally posted by Spad
Mate, please don't take this the wrong way, but it seems to be like a big gameshow where everybody gets to control your life on here sometimes. Sure ask people for advice, but I think the only shallow thing about all this is the fact you are basing your decision on whether or not to go out with this girl on what other people think!
I'm sure she'd be well chuffed to know that.
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Good point,Spad.Tiesto14,you should only take what you read here as good advice,and not rely solely on the opinions you get from the ppl here at the forum.That might confuse you even more at the end.
Other than that,I'm only gonna say one thing:what the hell are you waiting for?!?!This girl obviously puts a LOT of effort in making you happy,and it's very rare to find girls that are as caring and loving as you describe her here.And she's not ugly either,on the contrary!She's very pretty,and when she's pretty AND has got all the traits you describe here,I know I'd grab her tightly and never let her go.Cause girls like these don't come by very often,and when a girl like this actually COMES by,you gotta seize the opportunity.The comparison issue will just be one of the challenges you'll have to overcome in your relationship with her,altho it is one of the harder ones.Focus on all her good sides(which are vastly in the majority here),and I think you guys will do just fine.
Like so many ppl have said before me:You have nothing to lose.Go for it!;) |
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