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The True Story of jploveparade
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| Lytchix |
As you can see in these quotes, jploveparade doesn't seem to enjoy our sweet country :
| quote: | Originally posted by jploveparade
France is kinda sucky in some areas |
| quote: | Originally posted by jploveparade
French people smell like cheep weed and garlic |
| quote: | Originally posted by jploveparade
We are not like the French. We have style. |
| quote: | Originally posted by jploveparade
I can't believe the TA-FR won, cause there's lot more fun to make about France than England... :o :p |
And more recently :
| quote: | Originally posted by jploveparade
La France, c'est...
Le sex: 
Les droques: 
Le rock 'n roll:  |
To understand his strange behaviour, we have investigated on his past. :D
Now we have an explanation.
We let you discover what happened... ;) |
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| Shito |
Once upon a time jploveparade had a great lovestory with a beautiful german guy called Jonas! :clown:
Their love was fresh and their life was happy. They had wonderful feelings for eachother and spent some great moments having sex all night.
For their first trip together, what else could they choose than Paris, the most romantic city in the world? :toothless
Here is a first pic showing the happy faces of our lovers in front of
the Eiffel tower:
:cool: |
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| Lytchix |
This trip to Paris was like a dream. This city was so marvalous to Jonas and jplp that when the night came, Jonas asked jp for realizing all his fantasies. jp was so in love that he couldn't refuse it to his little sugar. 
As Jonas was a big supporter of Borussia Dortmund, his first fantasy was that jp became a sexy football player! :haha:
After a long and hot striptease, which allowed Jonas to discover once again jplp's beautiful (:rolleyes: ) body, jplp chose the french team shirt... :toothless
:eyespop: :tongue3 |
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| Shito |
Of course seing jplp's muscles through the football shirt, and his little ass under his short made Jonas come crazy. Jonas' fantasy began to work like never before, and thousands of ideas came to his mind. :crazy:
He first asked for a basque suit, with one of those traditionnal berets. But he didn't really enjoy it. :confused:
After several minutes he suddenly found out his ultimate sexual dream: jplp as an emperor, the great napoleon in his close-fitting suit! :eyes:
Tired after wanking so much thanks to this show, Jonas finally fall asleep. |
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| Lytchix |
The day after was a special day : Jonas and jp were invited to the famous garden party at Elysee.
jp got up and took a delicious breakfeast. Look how smart he is with his little bunches :
:tongue2 :tongue2
But time was counted and they had to be quickly dressed up to the nines to meet president "future Nobel prize" ;) Chirac.
jp was really impressed this day, he's so small in comparison with mister Chichi! :tongue:
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| Shito |
Being so close to the public life gave jplp a lot of new ideas. Now he only thought about one thing: he wanted to be a star! :p:p
Of course Jonas could only support his lover on this way, but he was not really convinced Jp's dream could come true someday.
To get his name well known, JP had an incredible idea that was going to change his life forever: he asked a painter in Montmartre to paint him as the famous Joconde, and exposed his face in the Musee du Louvre. The success was immmediate. :thepirate
Several cinema producers contacted him and offered him wonderful roles. His first important character was in "Le Gendarme se marie", but the consecration came with "Les Visiteurs", one of the most successful french movies of all times. JPLP's ridiculous face as Jaquouille la Fripouille was irresistible for the french audience!
:happy2: |
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| Lytchix |
As jp became a star, Jonas began to feel loneliness in their big house in St tropez. His little sugar was now an egoistic business man who didn't care anymore to him and their love. 
One day, he finally left jp for a french lover, Robert... 
jp was terribly affected by this event and definitely stopped his carreer because of a grave nervous breakdown.
He chose to isolate in Larzac, the peaceful french countryside, to take care of a goats herd. :toocool:
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| Shito |
After several weeks spent crying all the day, jp decided to start a new life. He finally came back to Germany, and worked in a Restaurant.
But not a french one: anything relative to France was now banned from his life. After working very hard, he became the chief of his own restaurant: that's where he met jdat, another food-addict. Both had a lot of things to share, and that was the beginning of a new wonderful story... :stongue:
But that's also where our story ends! :)
Now you can all understand Jp's hatred against France. You now know how much he suffered, and you certainly understand why he regularly spams all the forums, especially the humour/jokes one to make you believe he is full of humour! So full of humour that, of course, he'll understand that all this little french story is nothing else but a poor joke! ;);) |
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| Nightflowers |
OMG :nervous: :nervous: :nervous:
great story :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: |
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| Starfox |
OMFG THIS IS THE BEST THREAD EVER! LOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOL
hahahahahaha :haha: :haha: :haha: :haha: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :toothless :toothless :toothless :toothless :toothless :haha: :haha: :haha: :haha: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :stongue: :toothless :toothless :toothless :toothless :toothless |
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| DJ Mikey Mike |
:stongue: :stongue: :haha:
JP blatently owns u all tho  |
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| MaGiK54 |
| C'est bon :D Big fun frenchies :D |
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