|
TA Joke Thread! (pg. 2)
|
View this Thread in Original format
| Wazup8012 |
| quote: | Originally posted by RachUCF1001
hahaha yea,
Brian says to just go to court and the piggie probably wont even show and ill be home free,
im nervous to do that though, my luck he'll show up with his dunkin doughnuts and his little paper that shows he clocked me and ill end up looking like a total douche and ill be sooooooooooooooooooooooooooo maddddddddddddddddd if that happens:mad:
But im broke, so im considering that option, wont hurt to try, PLus im going to jail with all the tickets i fking get i swear.
BTW, ADAM, welcome to the crackie boards!
You are one of us now...
scAaAaRyyy MWUAHahahaha:wtf: |
Brian's right. Plead not guilty and show up to court. If he doesn't show up your home free, if he does most likely if you talk to him nicely and ask nicely he will be willing to lessen the charge. It's done all the time. |
|
|
| BitchBoyNYC |
| quote: | Originally posted by Wazup8012
That's hilarious.
Two hikers are walking through the woods. It's getting kinda late and they are getting really hungry, but nothing is in sight. They walk for a little whil longer and finally one of the hikers sees a small house. They walk over to the house and one of them knocks on the door. An old lady answers the door and lets him in. He asked her if it was possible that him and his friend could get some food as they were very hungry. The old lady(in her 80's) said "sure but you have to fuk me". He thought for a bit and then said "ok but you have to close your eyes". He then found a carrot and proceeded to give it to her with the carrot. When she was done he threw the carrot out the window and ate his meal. He decided that he was still hungry so he asked her "is it ok if we go again I'm still hungry?" She said, "sure it is". So she closed her eyes and he used another carrot. When he finished he ate his meal and walked outside. He told his buddy how amazing his dinner was. His buddy told him, "WOW that's really cool I had these two really tasty carrots" |
That's f0cking sick!!:haha: :haha: :haha: |
|
|
| RachUCF1001 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Wazup8012
That's hilarious.
Two hikers are walking through the woods. It's getting kinda late and they are getting really hungry, but nothing is in sight. They walk for a little whil longer and finally one of the hikers sees a small house. They walk over to the house and one of them knocks on the door. An old lady answers the door and lets him in. He asked her if it was possible that him and his friend could get some food as they were very hungry. The old lady(in her 80's) said "sure but you have to fuk me". He thought for a bit and then said "ok but you have to close your eyes". He then found a carrot and proceeded to give it to her with the carrot. When she was done he threw the carrot out the window and ate his meal. He decided that he was still hungry so he asked her "is it ok if we go again I'm still hungry?" She said, "sure it is". So she closed her eyes and he used another carrot. When he finished he ate his meal and walked outside. He told his buddy how amazing his dinner was. His buddy told him, "WOW that's really cool I had these two really tasty carrots" |
EWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWW
Adam I said I nned to Smile not Vomitotious all over the place!
:nervous: |
|
|
| RachUCF1001 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Wazup8012
Brian's right. Plead not guilty and show up to court. If he doesn't show up your home free, if he does most likely if you talk to him nicely and ask nicely he will be willing to lessen the charge. It's done all the time. |
and how the do I not know this?!
ive been getting an average of 4 speeding tickets a year since I was 16..:nervous: |
|
|
| BitchBoyNYC |
| Rach, I wouldn't sweat it. Just show up in court and just hope that the trooper don't come. If he does come, most likely the judge will lessen the amount of the ticket. How fast were you going? Isn't the speed limit on the highway down there like 75mph? |
|
|
| Wazup8012 |
| There are three men that want to marry this farmers gorgeous daughter. She was the most beautifull girl anywhere. So the farmer told them that if they could sleep in the barn for one night and the one that kept their soldier could marry her. They all agreed not knowing that the farmer already put an animal trap down in her southern region. The next morning the farmer made them line up ini a straight line and pull dwn their pants and underpants. The farmer looked at the first guy and said, "you failed you can't marry her". He looked at the second man and said the same. He then got to the third man and realised that everything was still intact. He said to the man, "congratulations you are the only one who passed my test. Do you have anything to say for yourself?" The man slowly said, "mwit wmas uhn uhna swir". |
|
|
| Wazup8012 |
| ore to come later but I have to get to therapy. |
|
|
| RachUCF1001 |
| quote: | Originally posted by BitchBoyNYC
Rach, I wouldn't sweat it. Just show up in court and just hope that the trooper don't come. If he does come, most likely the judge will lessen the amount of the ticket. How fast were you going? Isn't the speed limit on the highway down there like 75mph? |
i wasnt on the highway,
59 in 45, and for the record, EVERYONE speeds that much on this particular road,
There were like 10 cops standing on the corner with their stupid little radar guns pulling everyone over..
literally stepping out in the middle of the road , putting their arm up.. pointing at the car - and telling them to pull over. There was a line of people on the side of the road getting tickets written out for them!
bunch of BULL!
It was a Pullover Party.. never seen anything like it.
Im so ing pissed. But yea i think im going to plead NG |
|
|
| BitchBoyNYC |
A guy walks into a bar with a one foot man sitting on his shoulder. He ordered a beer. The bartender was curious as he got the beer for the guy, but as he put the beer down on the bar, before the guy could reach it, the little man lept off his shoulder and picked up the beer and dumped it in the guys lap.
The guy sighs and asks for a shot of wisky. As soon as the glass hits the bar, the little man threw the drink in the guys face and smashed the shot glass against the wall. "I have to know.... where did you get that guy?" "Well... I'll tell you... I was walking on the beach, saw a brass lamp, rubbed it, and a geenie came out. He said I could have one wish. I asked for a twelve inch prick and this is what I got" |
|
|
| vtec junkie |
| Little Johnny had a gambling problem so his teacher and his dad decided that they would try to find a way to break him of it. They both knew he only had $500 left. So one day Johnny goes to school and the teacher ask him to stay after class. She is going on and on about how for $250 she would raise all of his grades and clear his record in the principal's office. He wasn't paying any attention obviously because when she finally shut up he goes " you see that hair on your head?" and she goes "Uh yeah" and he goes "Well, I bet you $500 that the hair between your legs is just as red." and so she made the bet, and to his surprise it was the blackest bussle he'd ever seen. He gave up his last $500 and went home. Later that afternoon his teacher called his dad and told him that she thinks she broke his habit because she got all $500. Then the dad goes " No, bitch, because i bet him $500 this morning that he couldn't see your by the end of the day!" |
|
|
| BitchBoyNYC |
| quote: | Originally posted by RachUCF1001
i wasnt on the highway,
59 in 45, and for the record, EVERYONE speeds that much on this particular road,
There were like 10 cops standing on the corner with their stupid little radar guns pulling everyone over..
literally stepping out in the middle of the road , putting their arm up.. pointing at the car - and telling them to pull over. There was a line of people on the side of the road getting tickets written out for them!
bunch of BULL!
It was a Pullover Party.. never seen anything like it.
Im so ing pissed. But yea i think im going to plead NG |
ing Cops. That sucks Rach. That happened to me in PA once. The f0ckers came out of the damn trees with a radar gun pointed at me. Clocked me doing 84 in a 65. |
|
|
| BitchBoyNYC |
How true is this???
Who's the Boss?
When the Lord made man/woman, all the parts of the body argued over who would be boss.
The brain explained that since he controlled all the parts of the body, he should be boss. The legs argued that since they took man wherever he wanted to go, they should be boss. The stomach countered with the explanation that since he digested all the food, he should be boss. The eyes said that without them man would be helpless, so they should be boss. Then the applied for the job. The other parts of the body laughed so hard at this that the became mad and closed up.
After a few days...
The brain went foggy, the legs got wobbly, the stomach got ill, and the eyes got crossed and unable to see. They all conceded and made the boss.
This proved that you don't have to be a brain to be boss...
Just an . |
|
|
|
|
