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Can you have too many friends? (pg. 4)
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| zoogla |
My fiancee is very cautious and was actually pretty skeptical with me when I told her I was going to Waterloo to party with my "friends" or I'm going to the Docks for Danny T and will be surrounded by my "friends" or I'll meet new people that I want to get to know better and become "friends" with at System...
I get attached very easily to new people because I'm totally open and honest with them. This leaves me pretty vulnerable but that's why I'm so happy to have my fiancee to talk to and she is more like the voice of reason while I wear my heart on my sleeve.
I have to say I feel totally at home just within two months because of the EXTREMELY friendly people here. At first I was thinking it might be all the e everyone takes (LOL) but no, people are genuinely friendly and are happy to see you...
My fiancee always wants to correct me when I refer to the people I know here as my "acquaintances" rather than my "friends" as I refer to you...I understand and agree with the point that you have fewer REALLY close, BEST friends, but posting here every day and interacting several times a day with you people qualifies you as friends for me, especially when we meet up at events and have a WICKED ass time.
So many of you have asked me, "Fahad, you okay?" or offerred water or just generally stuck with me the whole night...that doesn't happen with acquaintances too often, I think because of the caring involved.
Anyway, if I haven't made it clear before I *heart* TOTA and consider you all my friends. Acquaintances are the people I see at work. |
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| Sly_Guy |
| quote: | Originally posted by dance2dabeat
I totally agree with that.
and friendship does not take that much time when you really click...just like dan and I....
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I don't.
I've been struggling with the issue of 'too many friends' for quite some time. Not to seem egotistical, but I do have a lot of friends I love to spend time with, and friendships do take quite a bit of work to maintain by spending time with them. Too many friends in my case has led to less than adequite time to do other things in my life like putting in time at work or school. And when my own goals and aspirations take a backseat to keeping my friends happy with me, it becomes a very large problem. Nothing is worse than a person you care about becoming scornful at you because they feel you aren't putting in the effort to spend time with them.
*NOTE*
The irony of this post is that it was done on a saturday night when I opted not to go out or spend time with anyone. Haha |
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| muzzybear |
| quote: | Originally posted by fayraree
My fiancee is very cautious and was actually pretty skeptical with me when I told her I was going to Waterloo to party with my "friends" or I'm going to the Docks for Danny T and will be surrounded by my "friends" or I'll meet new people that I want to get to know better and become "friends" with at System...
I get attached very easily to new people because I'm totally open and honest with them. This leaves me pretty vulnerable but that's why I'm so happy to have my fiancee to talk to and she is more like the voice of reason while I wear my heart on my sleeve.
I have to say I feel totally at home just within two months because of the EXTREMELY friendly people here. At first I was thinking it might be all the e everyone takes (LOL) but no, people are genuinely friendly and are happy to see you...
My fiancee always wants to correct me when I refer to the people I know here as my "acquaintances" rather than my "friends" as I refer to you...I understand and agree with the point that you have fewer REALLY close, BEST friends, but posting here every day and interacting several times a day with you people qualifies you as friends for me, especially when we meet up at events and have a WICKED ass time.
So many of you have asked me, "Fahad, you okay?" or offerred water or just generally stuck with me the whole night...that doesn't happen with acquaintances too often, I think because of the caring involved.
Anyway, if I haven't made it clear before I *heart* TOTA and consider you all my friends. Acquaintances are the people I see at work. |
Fayraree, I feel much the same as you (and I can't wait to get to know you better)! I put myself out there, and love getting to know people I meet, and what they're about, and give them some of myself in the process. I've made and lost friends over the years, but people have come into my life at certain times, as true gifts of God (gltv, b4-kos!). I feel the same as you do about those I work with (I spend most of my time watching my back).
I'm not always so good at remembering people from when I've been partying (I've actually learned to say "good to see you" instead of "nice to meet you" because of offending people I've met before).
I don't think anyone can have too many friends. That's what life is all about... sharing experiences and stories with new people and building a family of friends. |
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| Vivid Boy |
too many friends is impossible is justsomething pplw tih very little friends say. believe me whgen ulive in toronto u learn to pick ur friends wisely. and even then u havethem u keep em at a certain distance.i have 3 friends and im happy with all of them cause theyre genuinely good people who would never backstab me for anything. they carrythesame principles as i do and theyre smart intelligent people. they all have similar lives to me and were brought up in good similar families. its funny 2 of them are spanish and the other one is halkf italian. growing up the wai did u would expect me to have nothing but italian friends.
ps im hammered. and i think i totally over some kid without even knbowing it and i feel horrible abt it |
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| e*motion |
| quote: | Originally posted by jennypie
I was actually thinking about this the other day. I don't think anyone can have too many acquaintances. But I do think a person can really only have so many real, true friends. Relationships take time and effort, and it's just not possible, or fair, to try to be a friend to everyone. |
are we friends? or do you just use me for my everlasting stamina? :conf: |
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| StereoPrincess |
so what are the major differences between friends and acquaintances?
and to those saying that it doesn't require effort to maintain friendships are way off. friendships and relationships take a lot of time. |
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| zoogla |
Muzzybear, can't wait to meet you! :D
Re: diff btwn friend and acquaintance...
Personally, I hate using categories to define people...there are very few people I don't give my time of day to...and those are mainly people who don't give a about me and make it obvious...I would call THOSE people my acquaintances because there is no caring involved (aside from the fact that if I was choking on something they might help! LOL!) But strangers would probably help too...so...uh...nevermind. I guess an acquaintance is really a stranger whose name I remember! LOL! :toothless
A friend is someone who I can always talk to about anything (which is definitely the case with TOTAs) whether I'm ignorant about a topic or knowledgeable I always get a meaningful response back and I sense that people care for what I write/say/feel...THAT makes them a friend. Someone who would spend those extra hours of their sleep chatting with me or check in with me the next day to see if everything's okay at work...well now I'm bordering on "CLOSE" friend.
I just demonstrated why I hate categorizing my relationships with people...maybe the reason I tend to use the word friend so loosely is because of my personality; I love meeting new people and learning about their lives and experiences and actually caring if they feel sad or sharing in their happines...if ANYONE on this forum PMed me with a problem or wanted to chat on MSN I would ALWAYS be game. Just because I know we have something truly sacred in common: EDM. So my definitions are probably not the best ones.
EDIT:
This is a really cool subject to me so I gave it some more thought. I reread jennypie's quote and I was thinking, maybe an acquaintance is someone you meet through a friend or possibly a random stranger. Kinda like jennypie herself. I met her at the Docks at Danny T when she was sitting on the patio and I just came to hang out with the crew...who introduced us...I think it was one of the boys? Anyway, we got along pretty well so I feel like we could totally be friends even though right now we may just be acquaintances. It just takes a few more interactions for me...online or in person. Anyway there's my example. Muzzybear...I've never met her but I already consider her a friend (because b4k-oz, girllovingtvibe and kabelicious are DEFINITELY my friends...I hope:p) Okay time to sleep... |
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| miketg23 |
| There is no real way to define a friend, as it's really a subjective term. The thin line between friends and acquaitence is up to the individual. As for myself, I have my good friends (friends) and people I call friends from time to time (acquaitences). How often the word is used or how much weight it carries really doesn't matter as long as it makes the person using it happy. |
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| b4k-oz |
| quote: | Originally posted by StereoPrincess
so what are the major differences between friends and acquaintances?
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A friend knows ur deepest darkest secrets and desires....and they only see the positive in you (even when the hits the fan and every1 is covered in it). An acquaintance is someone u enjoy spending a good time with, but does not know ur struggles of life.
me... I like both..friends and acquaintances....I treat them the same way... but my intimate friends are very few...and they are the ones I would jump outta a moving car for... (but preferrably with heavy padding for protection hehehehe) |
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| Sly_Guy |
| quote: | Originally posted by b4k-oz
A friend knows ur deepest darkest secrets and desires....and they only see the positive in you (even when the hits the fan and every1 is covered in it). An acquaintance is someone u enjoy spending a good time with, but does not know ur struggles of life.
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I don't go by this definition. For the most part, I don't tell anyone about what's going on in my head, I'm just not that kind of kid. But that doesn't mean I don't have friends, the defining line for me would be that friends are people I make plans with, or go out of my way to spend time with while aquaintences are people I talk to or run into when I'm out and about. |
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| Silky Johnson |
| quote: | Originally posted by e*motion
do you just use me for my everlasting stamina? :conf: |
That, and your salty weiner. |
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| TrickDaddE |
If you make a handfull of true friends in your lifetime you have done well!
But you can never have too many aquaintances. |
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