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The $hittiest movies you've ever seen (pg. 9)
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| AndreaCKY772 |
the tiest movies i have seen, that i can remember off the top of my head
1. patch adams
2. fantastic 4 (i only liked jessica alba)
3. total recall
4. open water
5. grind
6. debs |
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| emc^2 |
Damn. I'm afraid to count all the crap movies I've seen. I probably wasted several years of my time on bad movies!!!!
Damn, I feel like I am mentally puking out all these titles. It's like a virus - I'm expelling all the nastiness I've witnessed (yet, it will forever remain with me.) I just sometimes wish I could erase a part of my brain responsible for remembering crap movies.
Here goes more movie vomit:
- The last action hero
- Jay and Silent bob strike back (no amount of love for Kevin Smith could save this crapola)
- American Band Camp (follow up to American Pie franchise) - reading the title was bad enough, thank lord I didn't see it.
- American Wedding
- Scorpion King
- ExistenZ ( my top 5 dumb-ass flicks of all time)
- Yeah, Matrix 2 and 3
- Saving Silverman
- The whole 10 yards |
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| paranoik0 |
| quote: | Originally posted by emc^2
- ExistenZ ( my top 5 dumb-ass flicks of all time) |
i loved that one :wtf: |
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| OrZonE |
I have every single movie beat with my choice for the tiest movie I've ever seen - The Snake King (2005)
This movie is the grand-daddy of them all, it's so bad I can't believe it made it to DVD. From horrid acting to a poorly executed script (it is even possible there was no script for this movie). Anyways, this review sums it up greatly, I urge you to read it:
| quote: | Someone at the Sci-Fi Channel must have thought making a movie about a giant, five-headed snake in the Amazon would make for a nifty monster movie. It probably could have if it hadn't been for the fact that the giant, five-headed snake is so huge that we generally only see one, two, or three heads on the screen at any given time. That is until the climax of the movie when all five are finally shown, albeit briefly, and even then you never really get a full body view of the creature to figure out how everything is interconnected. The movie establishes that the snake has a tail so they can't use the excuse of it having heads at both ends. I want to know where the hell the fourth and fifth heads disappeared to for the first three quarters of the movie. Were they on a smoke break? Were they given conscientious objector status for refusing to take part in the killing if innocent people? Were they off auditioning for a role in Python 3?
Oh, but wait, there are still more problems with the giant, five-headed snake. Despite the fact that it appears to be big enough to give Godzilla a heck of a fight, this colossal, multi-headed snake is still able to hide undetected in the jungle brush until it's too late. The noise it makes when slithering through the jungle is minimal and keep in mind we are talking about an enormous monster with five-heads, each at least the size of an automobile. If it wasn't constantly roaring (This snake doesn't hiss. It roars.), then it would barely generate any noise at all. People are constantly running away before coming to a stop and looking up just in time for one of the heads to lurch down and nab them. Despite being gigantic it still consistently managed to not only move around unseen, it actually sneaks up on people.
And if that wasn't enough, there are some serious continuity issues regarding the giant, five-headed snakes' size. It appears to suffer from Deep Star Six syndrome, and by that I mean its size changes depending on what is required of it in the scene. This is highlighted in the climax set inside its lair where it seems to shrink and enlarge at random. Each head is the size of an automobile and its cave entrance only appears big enough to fit one head and neck at a time so we don't even get an explanation as to how the thing even manages to get inside this cave chamber to begin with. Heck, at one point, this gargantuan serpent even manages to hide underwater in a small river just waiting to spring out and surprise someone. Good grief!
These are just the problems with the monster. And don't argue suspension of disbelief because there is a huge difference between suspension of disbelief and insulting one's intelligence. Worst of all, the CGI used to bring the giant, five-headed snake is some of the least convincing I've ever seen in a Sci-Fi Channel movie, and believe me, that is really saying something.
The fact that the monster turned out to be such a conceptual catastrophe is kind of a good thing because I'd hate to see a potentially cool movie monster wasted on a production as lame, formulaic, and downright dull as this stinker was. A complete waste of time and energy. |
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| arcadia190 |
mean girls
the only good thing about the movie is the 4 hot chicks
lol
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| AndreaCKY772 |
oh and monster man...that movie was so stupid it was funny (it wasn't meant to be funny)...and i fell asleep at about the half point.
if you want to see a movie with two dudes running around a desert-like area and one of them is running in CLOGS from some strange guy, then go see it. most pointless movie of all time. |
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| L.E.N. |
| House on haunted hill......the only movie I walked out on . |
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| emc^2 |
| quote: | Originally posted by OrZonE
I have every single movie beat with my choice for the tiest movie I've ever seen - The Snake King (2005)
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Hm... yeah, that reminds me:
- Anaconda. Someone probably got his snake polished nicely to release this crap for the first time. Imagine the spit shine he must have gotten to release the Anaconda 2???
Watch out! More movie vomit:
- Alien vs Predator
- O brother where art thou?
- Monkeybone
- Looney toons back in action
- Space Jam
- Kazaam
- Speed 2
- The Net 2
- Miss Congeniality 1 and 2
- Lake Placid
- Analyze That
- Minority Report
- Fatal Instinct (spoof "comedy" of basic instinct or fatal attraction)
- Biodome
- Encino Man
- Big Lebowski (it was actually good but WTF was with the ending???? what happened????) |
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| RapidFire |
| quote: | Originally posted by emc^2
Here goes more movie vomit:
- The last action hero
- Jay and Silent bob strike back (no amount of love for Kevin Smith could save this crapola)
- American Wedding
- Yeah, Matrix 2 and 3
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oh no you didin' |
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| stren |
| quote: | Originally posted by emc^2
Yeah... talk about a "'One hit wonder'-director" M. Night Shamalayan.
For Sixth Sense greatness, we had to suffer though:
- Unbreakable
- Signs
- The village
Personally, I won't spend a dime on seeing his movies anymore.
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i didn't even enjoy sixth sense, perhaps cause someone spoiled the ending for me ? |
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| AndreaCKY772 |
| quote: | Originally posted by RapidFire
oh no you didin' |
bahahahaaa |
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| arcadia190 |
| quote: | Originally posted by RapidFire
oh no you didin' |
what he said |
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