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Would you introduce your children to partying ??? (pg. 4)
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| evil_cookie |
| quote: | Originally posted by psiico111
Correction, that would be uncle of the year.:)
But seriously, you seem to have missed the part about her already doing drugs and drinking and skipping school, sex wasn't mentioned but I know that was going on too, as I said, I was once where she is. Everyone else was telling her not to do those things at all and she shut them all out, if anything, she got her back up about it and got worse with the way it was told to me. All I did was buck the trend and try to communicate with her in a way she would understand. Was it the best thing to do? No, but it did work. It was a better thing to do then what everyone else was doing. She's in school everyday now and from what I understand doing well plus her mother says she doesn't come home on Friday and Saturday nights out of it like she used to. This happened 2 years ago and she's still doing well. I may be a crappy uncle in your opinion but I did have an influence over her that put her in a better place then she'd have been in had she continued down the same road. I didn't tell her how to do it, she already knew, I told her how to be responsible about it. She listened to me where she wasn't listening to anyone else except her friends who I'm sure if they were anything like my friends at the time were constantly preaching to do things to excess.
If you haven't lived in a small town in the middle of no where it'd be difficult I think for you to understand how mind numbingly boring it can be to be a teen. There's nothing to do but drink, get high and screw. Add peer pressure to the boredom and it's no wonder kids in Nfld are getting pregnant at 14 and kids in NWT are hooked on sniffing glue or gasoline and drinking Lysol. And no before you freak out, I didn't say it was okay to sniff glue or drink Lysol, but kids up there do it. I knew 11 year olds who had been chewing tobacco from the age of 7 when I lived there. In Nfld we stuck to the booze and hashish, NWT kids were harsh in their habits. |
I was raised in Regina till I was 16, I know all about living in a small town.
If she's doing better, that's great.
What I’m suggesting is it wasn’t due to your 'advice' that her life improved. It sounds really mean, but I stand by it - you should never encourage a young child/teen to do drugs and drink, even if they are active and you’re trying to tell him or her to do it in moderation. It’s still the wrong message at end of the day, because you’re supporting the habbit, instead of opposing it, like you should. |
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| Cribby |
| I'm innocently trying to convince my younger sister...into the music though. Whether she chooses to succumb, and then decide to party is up to her. :thepirate |
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| Jem_hadar |
| I swear drew wants his sister Becca to get into the scene! ;) |
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| _EuG_ |
I am 20 and i have a brother who is 8. When he is 19, if he decides that he wants to party it up propper, i would love to be there for his first time.
but i think siblings and your own children is totaly different |
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| English Rachel |
| quote: | Originally posted by oldschool420
Don't plan on having kids. Unless the world takes a good turn in the next while. |
Justin, for someone almost half my age, you really impress me with your maturity sometimes
Is AB freezing?
xx |
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| English Rachel |
| quote: | Originally posted by evil_cookie
I was raised in Regina till I was 16, I know all about living in a small town.
If she's doing better, that's great.
What I’m suggesting is it wasn’t due to your 'advice' that her life improved. It sounds really mean, but I stand by it - you should never encourage a young child/teen to do drugs and drink, even if they are active and you’re trying to tell him or her to do it in moderation. It’s still the wrong message at end of the day, because you’re supporting the habbit, instead of opposing it, like you should. |
Ok
I agree with you to an extent.
I am going to throw a made up but, imo, real stat into the equation.... 80% of peeps are going to do it anyway!
Education rather than opposition FTW
I can't be arsed to type the full reasons why I believe this but trust me. They are vast and wide and span many socioeconomic and geographical areas. |
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| psiico111 |
| quote: | Originally posted by evil_cookie
I was raised in Regina till I was 16, I know all about living in a small town.
If she's doing better, that's great.
What I’m suggesting is it wasn’t due to your 'advice' that her life improved. It sounds really mean, but I stand by it - you should never encourage a young child/teen to do drugs and drink, even if they are active and you’re trying to tell him or her to do it in moderation. It’s still the wrong message at end of the day, because you’re supporting the habbit, instead of opposing it, like you should. |
Regina is much bigger then Aqlavik, and Aqlavik (750 pop) is bigger then some of the towns I lived in in Newfoundland. But yeah, I'd say Regina qualifies as a small town, at least compared to TO.
I'm not disagreeing with you, were she my daughter and living under my roof, trust me, I would have handled it very differently. I was asked to help because everyone was at their wits end. I don't even know the girl, that'll give an idea of how desperate everyone was if they asked me to talk to her. The last time I saw her she was 6 and that was only the second time I saw her. All my contact with her was through email, I didn't even speak to her on the phone. I did the best with what I had and what I was given. I didn't have the power to enforce opposition to what she was doing so it wasn't a route I felt I could take. If she were mine she'd still be grounded.:D I won't get into what sort of a mother she has or what types of boyfriends she has but you can well imagine.
| quote: | Originally posted by English Rachel
I can't be arsed to type the full reasons why I believe this but trust me. |
Arsed? I love it. I swear I haven't heard that expression in years. |
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| me@t k@tie |
| quote: | Originally posted by psiico111
Regina is much bigger then Aqlavik, and Aqlavik (750 pop) is bigger then some of the towns I lived in in Newfoundland. But yeah, I'd say Regina qualifies as a small town, at least compared to TO.
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I also come from a small town in the middle of nowhere (Barry's Bay), with a population of 1,200. The "trend" I noticed is that a lot of irresponsible parents have children whom, as young as 12 years old, are snorting coke and doing other drugs. I personally find that disgusting. The parent/s don't really do anything about it. A while ago, I was at someone's house, and their son, aged 13, was smoking weed outside with his friends. His parents just laughed it off. I Asked them how they could possibly find that funny, and the response: "We were teenagers at one point, and went through that phase." They said that they want their child to learn the difference between good and bad through experience.
I agree that kids need to learn certain things through experience, HOWEVER, I strongly believe that it is a parent's responsibility to guide their children through life. They need structure, and good role models. You can't expect them to grow up into mature adults on their own.
If you decide to have kids, be a responsible parent, FFS.
And I voted that when I have children, I will not introduce them to partying. If they do get into the scene on their own, I will definitely tell them how to party wisely, and not make some of the same mistakes that I have made. |
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| EvilTree |
| quote: | Originally posted by Ashley
Please highlight where I said that I would hide things from my daughter. I have just seen some things that have really scared me that I wouldn't want her to see. |
Poor choice of word on my part.
My apologies. |
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| EvilTree |
| quote: | Originally posted by _EuG_
but i think siblings and your own children is totaly different |
To a degree, I agree.
Might be a cultural thing, but if my sister does something stupid, I'm the first one to slap her in the head. |
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| ChemEnhanced |
Well...if I was to have a kid today...that would make me 51 by the time he/she was able to go to the club....I would like to think I will have stopped this crazy by then.
I would definately introduce my children to the music........its my car and I will play what I want in it. The only concern there is about the scene is the drug issue....I would definately want to talk to my kids about that.....I will probably need a new hook up by then anyhow :D
but seriously, if I ever do have kids I would want them to understand what they are getting into....if they are going to do them then they are going to do them....nothing I say or do can stop that. I would want them to be knowledgable about what they are getting into. |
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| psiico111 |
| quote: | Originally posted by me@t k@tie
it is a parent's responsibility to guide their children through life. They need structure, and good role models. |
Precisely what's wrong with my niece. She hasn't seen her dad since she was two months old and her mother is a flake with flakier men in and out of her life. If it wasn't for my father stepping into her life she'd have nothing. |
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