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i've got problems
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| tubularbills |
So, i'm a scorpio. and i've always really felt like i fit the description very well.
| quote: | from wiki
Being a water sign, Scorpio is considered highly passionate, imaginative, determined, persevering, inflexible and self-confident.
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lately, however, it seems as if the scorpio is getting the worst of me. i've always been a pretty passionate person, so much so that its just normal for me. example: when i kiss...i really do KISS...its not just some put my tongue down your throat or whatever. in bed, i always like things to last a long time...not just some quickie (at least, not all the time...nooners are fun every once in awhile, but both parties have to be cool w/ it).
but those (amongst other) things are coming off as "ways you express yourself if you want the next step in a relationship"...but to me it doesn't feel that way; and i'm not trying to portray myself as that, but i apparently cannot express that; and no matter what i say, doesn't make a difference to the other person.
i want to be able to avoid this (because its making me feel like ) but at the same time, i can't just pull a 180 and be all stand-off-ish; cause its just not who i am. i feel like i'm watching Vanilla Sky and the other person thinks i'm the cameron diaz character when i really don't feel that way. (seriously, just cause we ed 4 times, does not "mean something")
c0r version: what have you done to keep a "friend w/ benefits" simply just that? and have you ever been in a spot where the other party thought you were taking it "to the next step" when you really weren't? |
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| Silky Johnson |
| If it were me, I'd just a friend who isn't actually my friend. Someone I actually don't respect. Cause then I could them silly and treat them like a toy without feeling guilt or attachment. |
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| cmay119 |
| Friends with benefits is a slippery slope. It's not as easy as one may think, keeping the two parties on the same 'wave-length'. |
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| Vivid Boy |
im a pure aries.
passion, get to the point
when i kiss im already trying to get my dick in your mouth
when i sleep with you im trying to beat my last best personal time.
and when i love, im just trying to get you in bed |
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| elFreak |
| i'm pure pisces..i'll the out of them then yell , "welcome to the internet!" . |
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| Dervish |
This is all seeming a bit:
:p
Nah has similar issues myself hate seeing "that look" where they want more. Blah.
My plan is to just stop tapping anything and everything. Maybe drink less or something (seems unlikely lol). Or maybe just get a proper gf. |
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| tubularbills |
| quote: | Originally posted by jennypie
If it were me, I'd just a friend who isn't actually my friend. Someone I actually don't respect. Cause then I could them silly and treat them like a toy without feeling guilt or attachment. |
and that's what makes you a whore, my good friend Jenny. :)
does sex with someone you know always have to mean "something", however? can't it just be a way to satisfy some of those needs on maslow's hierarchy of needs? (i'm thinking physical needs, not emotional)
is it so much to ask to and then watch Sopranos?
i mean, you're a chick---if a guy s you do you automatically think that he wants you as more than just a benefit?
| quote: | Originally posted by Dervish
My plan is to just stop tapping anything and everything. Maybe drink less or something (seems unlikely lol). Or maybe just get a proper gf. |
lol, its funny that you mention alcohol; because the first two times we hung out was around booze. but neither of us were really drunk.
one of the first things i mentioned when we met too was that i was leaving in a few months....so a relationship wasn't possible...was just looking for a cool friend to hang out with. then we ed. and then we ed again. since then its been a mixture of hanging out (we cooked vodka sauce the other night); and ing. except last night i got "the conversation" about "are we still on the same wave-length?" (like cmay mentioned)
admittedly, i do have a little bit of a crush. that sounds so juvienelle, but its just that....like infatuation, not like, "omg i wanna spend the rest of my life with you" type of scenario.
ugh. |
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| Silky Johnson |
| quote: | Originally posted by tubularbills
i mean, you're a chick---if a guy s you do you automatically think that he wants you as more than just a benefit?
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Not at all. That's the last thing I would think, in fact. I would think "This guy just wants some ", and nothing more. |
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| tubularbills |
| quote: | Originally posted by jennypie
Not at all. That's the last thing I would think, in fact. I would think "This guy just wants some ", and nothing more. |
what if we ed and then had dinner (not the other way around)? |
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| Dervish |
You sound unsure? The ones I have had issues with have been what I've considered one night stands never this kinda thing.
See fact is if you are friendly with them and have a good time hanging about with them and talking to them etc AND they are fit AND let you shag them. It is kinda the recipe for a relationship. |
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| tubularbills |
| quote: | Originally posted by Dervish
See fact is if you are friendly with them and have a good time hanging about with them and talking to them etc AND they are fit AND let you shag them. It is kinda the recipe for a relationship. |
:mad:
btw, this is the 2nd time this has happened to me in like the past 4 months.:( |
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| Silky Johnson |
| quote: | Originally posted by tubularbills
what if we ed and then had dinner (not the other way around)? |
Well yeah, then it's clear it's all about the sex...cause dinner is the reward instead of the other way around. :toothless |
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