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Family Guy (pg. 4)
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| Mebot |
(Brian's stint as a seeing-eye dog)
Brian: "Okay, they're- they're in the woods... The camera keeps on moving... Uh... I think they're- they're looking for some witch or something- I don't know, I wasn't listening. Nothing's happening... nothing's happening... Something about a map... Nothing's happening... It's over. A lot of people in the audience look pissed"
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(Brian back where he was born)
Brian: "Hi I'm Brian,. I was born here."
Guy: "Sorry little fella, lots of puppies have been born here. Refresh my memory, which one were you?"
Brian: "I was the one who could talk."
Guy: "BRIAN!! COME IN!"
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Diane Simmons: "Our top story tonight: I will be playing the role of Ana in the Quahog Player's production of 'he King and I' Tom?"
Tom Tucker: "Thanks Diane. In other news, I won't be going to the play because I'm sure it will be lousy."
Diane: "Tom, I'm getting late word that you're a petty, jealous closet case."
Tom: "In breaking news, we now go live to Diane being a bitch. Diane?" |
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| montie |
When Stewie and Brian are burying Brian's mother:
Brian: "Say something"
Stewie: "What?"
Brian: "Just say something please!"
Stewie: "oh for gods sake... Yeh and god said to Abraham 'you will kill your son Isaac' and Abraham said 'I can't hear you you'll have to speak into the microfone.' And god said 'oh i'm sorry is this better, check, check, check, Jerry pull the highend out. i'm still getting some hiss back here'"
Brian: "Say something about my mother!"
Stewie: "oh yes i'm sorry. I never knew Biscuit as a dog but I did know her as a table, she was sturdy, all four legs the same length.." |
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| adam |
this has got to be the best show ever, and it's such a kick in the balls that they stoped making new ones.
the episode when stewie, meg and chris find 26 dollars...
BRIAN: "im impartial give me the money, i'll keep it, now where did you hide it?"
(Meg reaches into Stewie's diaper and feels around)
STEWIE: "what...what the devil.... (Meg pulls out wad of cash) oh very clever (stewie sticks his ass out towards meg) come back here you forgot your change!"
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Stewie and drian are up on stage with a hipnotist and are making out...
HYPNOTIST: "when i snap my fingers you'll come out of it" *SNAP*
BRIAN: "thats...thats amazing, i dont remember what happened, we were hypnotized"
STEWIE: (licking his lips a few times) "Do i taste crotch?" |
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| Resnick |
| quote: | Originally posted by Mebot
German Tour Guide: "You vill find more on Germany's contributions to ze arts in ze pamphlets ve have provided."
Brian: "Yeah, about your pamphlet... uh, I'm not seeing anything about German history between 1939 and 1945. There's just a big gap."
Tour guide: "Everyone vas on vacation! On your left is Munich's first city hall, erected in 15-"
Brian: "Wait, what are you talking about? Germany invaded Poland in 1939 and-- "
Tour guide: "Ve vere invited! Punch vas served! Check vit Poland!"
Brian: "You can't just ignore those years. Thomas Mann fled to America because of Nazism's stranglehold on Germany."
Tour guide: "Nope, nope. He left to manage a Dairy Queen."
Brian: "A Dairy Queen? That's preposterous!"
Tour guide: "I vill hear no more insinuations about the German people! Nothing bad happened! Sie werden sich hinsetzen! Sie werden ruhig sein! Sie werden nicht beleidigen Deutschland!" (throws his hand up in a Hitler salute)
Brian: "........uh, is that a beer hall?"
Tour guide: "Oh yes, Munich is renowned for its historic beer halls." |
^^^ hahah wtf, i havent seen that yet, although im still halfway thru thurd season, but what episode is that??
oh and the one where they get new house
Stewie: "you, bring me a wall street journal. You, bring me my lunch. You two, fight to the death."
and later
Stewie: "cut my bread *butler cuts bread. cut my apple *buttler cuts apple. cut my milk.
butler: "sir i cant"
Stewie: "imbecile! first freeze it, THEN cut it! |
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| BTG |
| quote: | Originally posted by montie
OH NO!
OH NO!
OH NO!
OOOH YEAAAAH!
been done here on these boards many times but no one ever seems to get it |
I get it.
thats my favorite part of any episode. :D |
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| djSlain |
"cmon!"
or, as pronounced by Peter:
keeee maaaaannnnn
kkkkkkkeeeeeee maannnnnnn
ke man!
kkeeee maannn! |
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| DaveSaenz |
| quote: | Originally posted by Mebot
Quagmire knocks on a door, some girls answers it :
Girl "Can I help you?"
Q-man " Perhaps! How old are you?"
Girl "16"
Q-man "18? Alright!"
Girl " MoMM!!!"
Q-man " I like where this is going! Giggidity giggidity giggidity!"
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Peter in a bookstore tryin to find a book about potty training.
Peter: "I'm looking for a book on toilet training"
Clerk: "Well Everybody Poops is still the standard one but we also have the less popular Nobody Poops But You"
Peter: " Uh-huh. Well see we're Catholic..."
Clerk: "Oh! Then you want You're A Naughty Child And That's Nothing But Pure Concentrated Evil Coming Out The Back End Of You!"
Peter: "Perfect!"
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Peter: "Lois, you're acting like i've never done anything stupid before! Hey remember when we were about to get that boat?"
(10 minutes ago)
Peter: " A boat's a boat but a mystery box could be anything! It could even be a boat! You know how much we've wanted one of those!"
Lois: "We'll go with the boat-
Peter " We'll take the box!"
Salesman: "the box is yours"
(10 minutes later)
Lois: "Peter That was ten minutes ago!" |
LOL best show ever.
In Rhode Island the age of sexual consent is 16 anyways:
http://www.ageofconsent.com/rhodeisland.htm
Quagmire is safe.:D |
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| Dr. Cfire |
This is really creepy since all day today in the test lab all we did was remember family guy quotes.
here we go.
Lois: Your behaving like a child
Peter: Well if im a child that makes you a pedophile and Im not going to stand here and be insulted by a pervert. |
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| Boomer187 |
I say we post every line from that series. til then here are some more.
Peter: so stuie had a puff, so what, he's old enough to make his own decisions for god's sake louis he's one cut the ambilical cord.
I am here today to talk to you today about smoking. I know a lot of you are already on my side. And for you nay sayers I have two strong words for you: | quote: | Originally posted by djSlain
keeee maaaaannnnn
kkkkkkkeeeeeee maannnnnnn
ke man!
kkeeee maannn! |
Random guy in senate: cigarettes killed my father, and they raped my mother. |
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| montie |
| quote: | Originally posted by Boomer187
Random guy in senate: cigarettes killed my father, and they raped my mother. |
haha dammit you beat me to it. i was gonna post that. :p
The episode where the Griffens are put in the witness protection program and moved south
FBI Agent: You will be reloacted to the deep south.
**everyone moans**
Peter: Isn't that the place where the black guys are really lazy, and all the white guys are really lazy but they are made at the black guys for being so lazy.
Peter in the outhouse
Peter: ohh god. oooh. ohhh its everywhere, oooh, its in my racoon wounds. |
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| montie |
| quote: | Originally posted by BTG
I get it.
thats my favorite part of any episode. :D |
haha hell yeah. that part is classic. |
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