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Another gay advice thread...but mine's a little different
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| Slylee |
no relationship advice needed.
ok, so i think i have a problem with managing money...no that's a lie, i DO have a MAJOR problem managing money. it's an addiction and i can't stop spending. i'm sure it has to do with impulsiveness. anyway, is it gay to go to therapy about it? lol it really worries me because i plan on being extremely successful and rich, but you have to be smart about money to be those two things. Do you guys have any tips to help me stop spending? I don’t know what to do. Even though I know I have a few bills to pay, I still HAVE to have that pair of shoes or those jeans. Yesterday I sent my boyfriend balloons (flowers would have been gay) and it was like $40! I definitely don’t have $40 right now, but I still did it. I was like oh who cares. that’s bad. |
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| UWM |
I don't know if therapy will help, maybe it will. I used to have that problem too, but then for a while I was really broke during school and learned how to live on basically nothing and not buy anything I didn't absolutely need so now I have no problem anymore.
:D |
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| tranceaholic |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
no relationship advice needed.
ok, so i think i have a problem with managing money...no that's a lie, i DO have a MAJOR problem managing money. it's an addiction and i can't stop spending. i'm sure it has to do with impulsiveness. anyway, is it gay to go to therapy about it? lol it really worries me because i plan on being extremely successful and rich, but you have to be smart about money to be those two things. Do you guys have any tips to help me stop spending? I don’t know what to do. Even though I know I have a few bills to pay, I still HAVE to have that pair of shoes or those jeans. Yesterday I sent my boyfriend balloons (flowers would have been gay) and it was like $40! I definitely don’t have $40 right now, but I still did it. I was like oh who cares. that’s bad. |
i am the same way...thats why i walk around with only 20 bucks or so in my pocket...i could spend like nobody's buisness...also i carry around like a low limit credit card and leave the big boys at home..so i guess best advice is leave ur credit cards at home and ur cash in the bank...carry around just enough for emergencies. |
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| Slylee |
| Well I’ve made some progress. I used to go to the mall and buy clothes that I wasn’t necessarily crazy about. I would just like, “oh well, I need to buy something, this will do”. But now, I buy on a strict NEED TO HAVE basis rule and I don’t break it. If I try something on and it’s taking me several minutes to decide if I like it or not, I won’t buy it. I know when I HAVE to have something...I try it on, and I’m like, “oh hell yea”. that’s the only time I buy something now. So that’s a start. |
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| UWM |
| I come very cheap with an easy return policy, you can buy me! |
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| Floorfiller |
you don't need therapy...you just need a good smack in the face haha. ok no, but seriously...you're right...you won't be able to be wealthy if you don't setup a financial situation for yourself that will allow it. what is therapy really going to do? you already know your problem and you know how to solve it...just do it damn it!!
jason's tough love for the day |
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| dj tek |
| keep yourself busy with other things then shopping/spending money... once you find something you can get a natural high on, managing $ will be a little more easier. |
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| tribu |
The big issue here is self-control. From your second post, it seems like you've already started to make progress in this area. Possibly what you need to do is sit down and write out (or use Excel) to make a budget based on about 95% of your known income. This allows you to set limits on what you can and can't spend, and also gives you a little bit left over to use how you want. If charging is your problem, zero out your balance on your credit cards and toss them. Get a new one with a balance less than one of your paychecks (not sure if you make cash, checks, salary). Get rid of your check cards, and use your atm card only in emergencies. Go back to hadwriting checks, it will make you cut down on spending (it takes more work, many places dont accept personal checks, and it's a hassle) and the check register helps you keep track of your funds. If you spend all the money youve set aside for your pay period, resist the urge to get more by enjoying one of the possesions you already have.
Buying something cause it looks hot is nice, but I bet you have alot of clothes which look good on you already, some you may not have worn more than 4 or 5 times. Why not use the wardrobe you have already? Clothes are pretty expensive, especially designer clothes and even a couple of blouses, pairs of jeans and other things can make money disapear fast. Resist buying new clothes unless you need to. For special ocassions, pull something rarely worn from the back of the closet, or pull a Marge Simpson and do some altering.
long post...sorry.
Short version:
Self control
Manage your money via a budget
Tailor your credit to your income
Dont buy clothes when youve got a closet full. |
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| igottaknow |
| The act of buying something gives one a rush of happiness. As you start to get older you realize material goods only provide a temporary high. There are a lot more important things in life than material goods. I know when I'm down or stressed out about something, shopping tends to distract me from my problems. I see no problem sending him ballons, selfless acts are really kool. Oh one other technique buy with cash instead of credit. The realization of how much it cost makes you think about whether you really need it. |
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| Slylee |
well when I was 18, I got 2 credit cards and maxed them out and then after a while, I was going through a bad time in my life and I was kinda depressed with no job and stuff so I couldn’t pay my bills..so I just swept them under the rug, and I have bills in collections now so my credit is really bad. so that’s not a problem with me. I just have my atm card. I’m like about 3k in debt, but that’s so insignificant compared to other people’s debt, I really don’t feel like forking out the cash to start paying it off, because I’m hoping maybe one day I can just run into that kinda money and just pay it off you know? I DID get a car financed recently with my mom as a co-signer, so that will help to start repairing my credit, but I still have those other accounts that I haven’t even made payments on in like 2 years. lol I’m horrible. It’s very irresponsible of me...
hey don't those things disappear after 7 years? all of this started when i was like 19....i'm about to turn 23..it's not like I plan on buying property or anything at least until I’m like 30 and well into my career. by that time it’ll be 7 years since my bad credit history started. Should I say screw it? |
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| UWM |
| They'll go away after 8 years. |
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