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Sticky situations at work
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| preppie chick |
Something happened at work today and i'm not sure how to deal with it.
I was standing by the fax machine which is right across from one of the agent's office and as i waited for the fax to go through I strechted my back for maybe 2 seconds when the agent said to me from his office "Hold that pose"... At first i just thought it was one of his jokes but when i started thinking about it, I realized how much it bothered me. He always tells me dirty jokes although i've expressed that i'm not okay with it, not only is he my dad's age but he also has a daughter who happens to be my age. I never really made a big deal out of it before because i do think that he's a good person afterall, but his comment today really was unecessary and made me feel uncomfortable.
Then as I was leaving work while having a smoke with one of my coworkers, she asked me if he was still in the office, and when i asked why, she told me that she feels uncomfortable when he's around because he keeps on asking her out for lunch and saying stuff like how he likes her. She also told me that she has told our office administrator about it.
I don't really know whether i should tell the office administrator or approach him and say that i really don't appreciate his jokes/comments. I also wouldn't want him to get fired but i'd like him to stop making us feel umcomfortable.
Has anyone else dealt with a situation similar to this at work? thanks in advance. |
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| TranceGrooves |
well you have already expressed your concern to him about how he makes you feel uncomfortable. well if you just leave the matter to that then he may stop bothering you and your friend but will start bothering other girls. maybe not in your office but perhaps somewhere else. i personally have no respect for these kind of jerks as they are nice polite and all good up front but behind the scenes its a totally different story.
my suggestion. take appropriate action with higher powers because if something ever does happen then questions will arise as to why nothing was brought to attention when all of it started.
cheers. |
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| jon jon |
| tough call, maybe tell him to off personally first, and if it persists him up w/ HR. (or admin, or whatever) |
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| Theresa |
I had something similar happen to me at one of my old jobs.
I ended up asking the manager to have a meeting with myself and the guy who was bothering me, and I explained to him with the manager in the room that what he was doing was making me very uncomfortable.
Unfortunately, not a whole lot changed. However, I would assume that in a properly run business, this would make a huge difference. |
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| Cosmic Fur |
I thought this thread would be about quietly mastrurbating under the office desk. :(
Anyway, just let your manager know. This is definitely a case of sexual harassment, especially coupled with the fact that there's another woman who's being harassed. I don't think telling him will accomplish anything. |
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| Jer. |
| quote: | Originally posted by jon jon
tough call, maybe tell him to off personally first, and if it persists him up w/ HR. (or admin, or whatever) |
I concur. |
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| VERTiG0 |
I had a 60 year old woman slap my ass last Friday at work.
Wierd. |
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| m2j |
I think you should tell the your office administrator exactly the same thing you just posted, preppie chick.
It expresses the situation, how you feel, and what you'd like done about it very effectively. |
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| me@t k@tie |
| I have been in a few uncomfortable work situations like that...it's not fun. Contact whoever represents WDHP at your work and explain what is going on. They will give you the choice of a few ways to have it dealt with...but it will be brought to the guy's attention, (and to human resources if you decide to go that far). He will be dealt with, though. Not necessarily fired, but he will definitely be given a warning. All employees have the right to inform someone if they feel violated in any way. Good luck with everything! :) |
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| TJB |
Holy Girl,
I am sorta going through the same thing at work. Except that it is my boss that is making these jokes and leaving me uncomfortable with the situation. I told him last week to lay off or I would sue him for sexual harassment...
I would take Jon Jon's advice first and talk to him about how uncomfortable it makes you feel. Make sure you let him know exactly how you feel though and don't tip toe around it. Also tell him that if it doesn't stop you will go to admin and tell them what is going on. |
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| Skipper |
| quote: | Originally posted by m2j
I think you should tell the your office administrator exactly the same thing you just posted, preppie chick.
It expresses the situation, how you feel, and what you'd like done about it very effectively. |
Well said. |
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| rabbitjoker |
"sticky" eh? (sorry, I had to say it... ;) off-color joke I know)
Management training has taught me (i.e. this is how our lawyers told us to handle such situations):
1. Document everything. Dates, times, locations, words, discussions, situations, clothing, haircuts, etc. KEEP DETAILED LOGS OF EVERY INTERACTION. Do not be alone with perpetrator -ever-. Always have witnesses, seek witness observational testimony (i.e. "Did you see that? Would you mind writing down what you saw, signing it and dating it?").
2. Do not talk to the perpetrator directly. You are not his/her boss, you are not in a position to offer discipline. This will only cause confrontations and may cause you harm (demotion, firing, physical, etc.).
3. Report the matter to the highest level executive within the perpetrators department and your own department. Provide them detailed documentation of the harassment. Deliver the the complaint verbally but also in writing (via registered mail, keep receipt).
4. No change or negative consequence of your reporting of the issue? File a sexual harassment complaint against the bastard and the shoddy organization with the Ontario Human Rights Commission (http://www.ohrc.on.ca) and then be prepared to go through a possibly lengthy process of settlement.
Considering not doing anything? Worst possible option. Imagine what the next woman will feel like - imagine how things could end up if the next woman was more compliant/subservient (due to power exchange). By not reporting you perpetuate abuse. |
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