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Dilemma here (pg. 6)
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| Orbax |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
He gets nervous confronting people now because if they act like s to him, he’ll flip out right back and it could get ugly.
I didn’t feel like getting into all of this since my posts are long enough, but hopefully that clears some stuff up. :) |
Youre friend sounds like a psycho who has no self control. All or nothing is for out of control. I wouldnt be involved with a nut job who actually tells you not to piss him off he'll kill you |
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| Silky Johnson |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
i suppose, but i'm just trying to say that i'm very comfortable bringing like 98% of any uncomfortable topics up to people. i'm sure there have been times when i was scared to confront someone...usually it's like my boss or something, but for the most part, i'm pretty confrontational, and believe it or not, i'm actually pretty good at confronting people. i became the master of this with my ex who hated communicating, so i always had to get all creative and be very calm, about things i needed to talk to him about because i didn't want to scare him off...i had to get him to talk, and that's really ign hard when you're dealing with someone who HATES talking things out. you have to be really persistant, but in a non-aggressive way. it's tough lol |
Hehe...yeah that's exactly what being assertive is all about! It's actually really easy. The whole idea is that it's NOT about being accusatory or placing blame on someone. It's about making clear YOUR issues without encroaching upon another person's comfort/beliefs/whatever.
Never say things like "YOU should do this", or "YOU didn't do that", etc.
Just have to state what the problem is and how it affects you, and what you'd like to see change about it.
And that's my tip of the day! :gsmile: |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by Orbax
Youre friend sounds like a psycho who has no self control. All or nothing is for out of control. I wouldnt be involved with a nut job who actually tells you not to piss him off he'll kill you |
no, he has a lot of self control. he's come a long way from how he used to be (a punk). he's learning to just take things in stride and not get in fights over everything.
to be honest, what Oscar did is really ing shady and rude and i don't blame him for being really pissed off and not knowing how to go about confronting him.
like, "hey dude, i opened your mail and discovered you've been ripping me off. oh and by the way, quit blasting your music at 1 in the morning when i'm sleeping"
that puts him in a tough spot (FB).
and he's a total softy with women. he is jokingly rough with me, but i don't ever see him as the type to hit a woman. he is more the type to almost kill a guy for hitting a woman. |
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| Zoso |
| "Oscar"....pffft. :rolleyes: Is he green? Does he live in a garbage can? I think not. Better fake names, FTW, please. :whip: |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by jennypie
In Sly's case here...instead of just being straight up with the guy and telling him what her prob. with him is and why she can't be friends anymore, she chooses to just "stop hanging out with him". |
Ooh ok, I was confused about why everyone, or just you jennypie was calling me passive/aggressive. I missed this post.
Ok, well yes, THIS is a good example of me being passive/aggressive, however, I’m only doing it this way because I really shouldn’t know about this in the first place. FB told me this in confidence and if I tell Oscar that I know about it, and that I’m chosing not to be friends with him because of it, it will stir up a load of more drama between him and Oscar and I don’t want that to happen.
There’s a time and a place for everything and some situations call for passive/aggressive behavior. In my FB’s situation, he shouldn’t be using passive/aggressive behavior because this is his beef with Oscar, but in mine, I just happen to know about stuff I shouldn’t know about, and it affects the way I feel, but I can’t really confront oscar...
whatever u know what i mean |
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| Aristronica |
| the real question is - has he put it in yout butt yet? |
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| gehzumteufel |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
like, "hey dude, i opened your mail and discovered you've been ripping me off. oh and by the way, quit blasting your music at 1 in the morning when i'm sleeping" |
bills that are in a single roommates name but being paid by both roommates means that its BOTH their mail. not just oscars. |
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| Boomer187 |
| quote: | Originally posted by jennypie
There aren't enough starring your mother. SICKBURN! |
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| Omega_Blue |
| quote: | Originally posted by Boomer187
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still funny, but doesn't have the same effect as the first time i saw it. i DEMAND new, equally entertaining icons!!! ..it still looks like someone roflpooped in his corn flakes though :stongue: |
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| Boomer187 |
| quote: | Originally posted by Omega_Blue
still funny, but doesn't have the same effect as the first time i saw it. i DEMAND new, equally entertaining icons!!! ..it still looks like someone roflpooped in his corn flakes though :stongue: |
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| Slylee |
:stongue:
holy that is hilarious |
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| Omega_Blue |
| quote: | Originally posted by Boomer187
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... :stongue: |
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