|
In need of some good advice...SERIOUSLY!!!
|
View this Thread in Original format
| woscar99 |
Ok, so I know the TA c0r isn't precisely the best place to post this but I'm in desperate need of some good advice. Can't ask any of my friends for obvious reasons, so I turn to you.
I've been with my girlfriend for 7 years and running. We've had our ups and downs but we've been pretty much alright the whole time. Lately, we've been getting into a lot of huge arguments over the stupidest things and quite frankly I'm getting sick of it. I've found myself wanting to end things quite often over the past few months, but I always think things through and realize that this might just be a phase and things will get better, all I have to do is put some extra effort to make it work just like she has done on other ocassions when I've been a big jerk. Additional to our personal relationship problems I'm also getting quite sick of her family. Specially her mother who is one of the reasons we get into arguments. She has been very good to me this 7 years, but lately she's been quite an old witch. Don't really know why. As for the rest of her family, I quite frankly can't stand being in the same room with them for over 5 minutes. They're quite a bunch of social rejects.
But lately, I've been sorta talking a lot to this girl from work and I've noticed that whenever I talk or hang out with her I feel things I haven't felt in quite some time. Things I haven't felt since I fell in love wih my girlfriend. This last week, my gf left on a class trip for 5 days and quite frankly I didn't miss her like I thought I would do. IOn the other hand I haven't seen the girl from work in ONE day and I'm already missing her like hell! :( I can't wait for Monday so I can see her again! Not only is she so ing cool, she's so ing beautiful as well. I'm telling you, she's just gorgeous!
I used to think me and my gf were meant to be together, but this girl has got me so confused. I have way more things in common with her than I have with my gf and it never felt so natural to talk to a girl before. I'm starting to think this could be "the one". :conf:
Also, I have the feeling she's a little bit into me too. I really can't explain it, it's just the way she behaves and talks to me. I've been flirting with her the past week and she somehow flirts right back. For example, a few days ago on MSN I was telling her how I was really sick of my gf's mother and she said something like "you know, my mother is NOTHING like that"...I replied, "then I guess I wish I had a mother in law just like your mom" (the term mother in law is used quite informally over here, by the way...). Then she said something that I can't really translate literally (we speak Spanish in Guatemala) but I interpreted it as "yeah, quite a difference, huh? ;)" with a bit of sarcasm.
I can't help it, I'm definitely falling for this girl and I don't know what the to do!!! :conf:
I've really felt like today, as I feel like I've been cheating on my gf even though nothing has happened with this girl. And I definitely the last thing I want to do is hurt her, because I really do love her. It's just, I'm starting to love this other girl too and I can't help it.
So, what the do you think I should do?!
IMPORTANT DEVELOPMENT:
After trying to work things out I realize that things won't be the same between my gf and me so I decided to break up with her. I won't get into all the details but the important thing is that I made up my mind and saw that it was the best thing to do as painful as it was.
Now, as you remember I was starting to get feelings for a girl at work. I went out with her last Thursday (b4 the breakup) to a Lee Burridge gig (yes, she's crazy about EDM too! :D )and quite frankly I can't remember having such a great time in like a year or so. So, as you imagine my feelings for her are growing. As I'm writing this, I'm getting ready to go out with her tonight. She invited me to a party at her cousin's house. I gotta tell you guys, I REALLY like this girl and I can really see things going somewhere but I gotta play my cards right. On one hand, I just got out of a very long relationship and I should not rush things with this girl (no matter how much I want her). But on the other hand, I'm afraid that if I go way to slow I might end up in the "friend zone" or that someone else might take her first. Your advice is more than welcome! |
|
|
| Psy-T |
| drink & smoke. tolstoy says it'll distract you from your woes. :p |
|
|
| iammesol |
| Work it out with your g/f. If life sucks in another year you're either A) subconciously married or B) don't need to be dating her. |
|
|
| MrJiveBoJingles |
| quote: | Originally posted by Psy-T
drink & smoke. tolstoy says it'll distract you from your woes. :p |
:haha: |
|
|
| _Ocean_Drive_ |
at least wait until your gf gets back, and sit down and tell her what you've told teh c0re. You gotta be honest, 100% completely, no matter how much it hurts. |
|
|
| all-nite-freak |
sex pics, venereal disease and self inflicted bodily harm solve everything.
call me:gsmile: |
|
|
| woscar99 |
| quote: | Originally posted by iammesol
Work it out with your g/f. If life sucks in another year you're either A) subconciously married or B) don't need to be dating her. |
Could you please elaborate?
Psy-T, I've already tried drinking and been smoking more than usual lately but it didn't help...
:conf:
You gotta love teh c0r...6 responses in 15 minutes ;)
_Ocean_Drive_ : she's already back. I just don't have the heart or the balls to tell her just yet. Nothing has really happened with the other girl, so I don't think it's worth the huge argument that will undoubtedly ensue. I figure I will have to talk to her about it sooner or later, but I think now is not the right time. I might end up losing them both you know...:( |
|
|
| Fledz |
| quote: | Originally posted by woscar99
_Ocean_Drive_ : she's already back. I just don't have the heart or the balls to tell her just yet. Nothing has really happened with the other girl, so I don't think it's worth the huge argument that will undoubtedly ensue. I figure I will have to talk to her about it sooner or later, but I think now is not the right time. I might end up losing them both you know...:( |
You have to tell her how you feel though. You've been together for 7 years so it's pretty serious and I'm sure you can be completely honest.
Look at it this way, do you want to stay with her for another few years and then find out you weren't meant to be together, or end it now if you're sure it won't work out?
Tread lightly with conversation about the other girl though. Just state that you're getting feelings for someone else that you wish you had with your gf still, but that the problem is you don't feel like that anymore.
After you talk it through with her, then you will know what to do. Better to mutualy agree to break up than cheat on her, or just dump her without a sufficient explanation.
If all else fails then yes. Threesome :p |
|
|
| Fledz |
| quote: | Originally posted by woscar99
_Ocean_Drive_ : she's already back. I just don't have the heart or the balls to tell her just yet. Nothing has really happened with the other girl, so I don't think it's worth the huge argument that will undoubtedly ensue. I figure I will have to talk to her about it sooner or later, but I think now is not the right time. I might end up losing them both you know...:( |
You have to tell her how you feel though. You've been together for 7 years so it's pretty serious and I'm sure you can be completely honest.
Look at it this way, do you want to stay with her for another few years and then find out you weren't meant to be together, or end it now if you're sure it won't work out?
Tread lightly with conversation about the other girl though. Just state that you're getting feelings for someone else that you wish you had with your gf still, but that the problem is you don't feel like that anymore.
After you talk it through with her, then you will know what to do. Better to mutualy agree to break up than cheat on her, or just dump her without a sufficient explanation.
If all else fails then yes. Threesome :p
EDIT - btw, don't worry to much about the other girl. Focus on yourself first as she could just be an escape for you from your gf. Once you're single you may not even feel about her like that anymore. |
|
|
| Psiweaver |
If you really feel like it should end youll subconciously find a way to end it. I would suggest talking to your current GF about the situation and try and figure out a way to solve the problem. Getting married certainly won't solve the problem. I would suggest trying to figure out whats at the basis of what you guys are fighting about and work on solving that.
The thing is that if you really feel like its over witht he old girl then I would suggest ending it and moving along. |
|
|
|
|
