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My Parents are Crazy Story (pg. 6)
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| AndreaCKY772 |
yes. there are a lot of great things my mom has done for my sister and i that i won't forget. i'm trying to work on our relationship because the Lord knows that we haven't had the best relationship. my sister tells me that my mom thinks i don't like her and a lot of times i feel that she doesn't like me either. i don't want it to be that way! jus the other day i was talking to her and i was asking her about things that make her happy and what she likes to do... whenever i'm home i always see her in and talk to her about whatever she wants to talk about before she goes to sleep. however, i don't tell her very much about my personal life... i don't tell her details on everthing. and everytime we have or differences and i get angry, i try to think about the positive things she has done for me. just this year i realized i have to explain to my mom that we have this type of relationship because we are just so different and we don't understand each other... that's really what it is. before, i didn't really look into it all that much but that didn't get me anywhere.
i am glad that she gave me hard times about going out sometimes because she was just looking out for me. i am glad she raised me with manners and i am glad she paid for my college education... i'm grateful she raised my sister and i being a single mother. it's hard and i can't imagine going through it. it's just hard sometimes when there has been so much ups and downs in our relationship and when i truly think of some of the stuff she has done/said over the years that have hurt me or my sister... our relationship is complex as hell. i'm just trying to work on positivity in our relationship because it's really no good being awkward around each other. i'm happy though at least her and my sister have a much closer relationship. they can talk about ANYTHING... at least she can have a better mother- daughter relationship with someone instead of no one. |
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| igottaknow |
| quote: | Originally posted by dj tek
i wish restaurants took checks..lol
goin against a chain restaurants' policy to 'make a point' is kinda retarded.. sorry IGK, no disrespect to ya pops.. |
no i feel the same way. if it was an isolated incident i wouldn't have a problem. its a pattern of behavior. |
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| dj tek |
| quote: | Originally posted by igottaknow
no i feel the same way. if it was an isolated incident i wouldn't have a problem. its a pattern of behavior. |
you guys [im assuming you & your mom] need to let him know that sometimes your dad's way of doing things might be justifying to him but can create annoyance to other ppl. :) |
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| igottaknow |
| quote: | Originally posted by dj tek
you guys [im assuming you & your mom] need to let him know that sometimes your dad's way of doing things might be justifying to [i]him[i/] but can create annoyance to other ppl. :) |
he knows, we actually told him at the table, he probably enjoys that it annoys us too or doesn't care. |
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| dj tek |
| quote: | Originally posted by igottaknow
he knows, we actually told him at the table, he probably enjoys that it annoys us too or doesn't care. |
lol
ok then
next ! |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by AndreaCKY772
yes. there are a lot of great things my mom has done for my sister and i that i won't forget. i'm trying to work on our relationship because the Lord knows that we haven't had the best relationship. my sister tells me that my mom thinks i don't like her and a lot of times i feel that she doesn't like me either. i don't want it to be that way! jus the other day i was talking to her and i was asking her about things that make her happy and what she likes to do... whenever i'm home i always see her in and talk to her about whatever she wants to talk about before she goes to sleep. however, i don't tell her very much about my personal life... i don't tell her details on everthing. and everytime we have or differences and i get angry, i try to think about the positive things she has done for me. just this year i realized i have to explain to my mom that we have this type of relationship because we are just so different and we don't understand each other... that's really what it is. before, i didn't really look into it all that much but that didn't get me anywhere.
i am glad that she gave me hard times about going out sometimes because she was just looking out for me. i am glad she raised me with manners and i am glad she paid for my college education... i'm grateful she raised my sister and i being a single mother. it's hard and i can't imagine going through it. it's just hard sometimes when there has been so much ups and downs in our relationship and when i truly think of some of the stuff she has done/said over the years that have hurt me or my sister... our relationship is complex as hell. i'm just trying to work on positivity in our relationship because it's really no good being awkward around each other. i'm happy though at least her and my sister have a much closer relationship. they can talk about ANYTHING... at least she can have a better mother- daughter relationship with someone instead of no one. |
Yea and sometimes when you grow up with a very intense, controlling single mom, you just have to realize that she will forever be set in her ways. Can’t teach an old dog new tricks, so you just have to be the bigger person and learn how to cut corners when dealing with her.
I don’t tell my mom much these days either. I mean since I’m living with her, I can’t exactly keep THAT much from her, but I don’t really get into details about stuff any more, especially when it comes to guys. I just keep it to myself because she usually has a little too much to say about things in that regard. I love spending time with my mom, we go to dinner all the time lately and we have great conversations and crack each other up, but it’s mostly superficial bull. I don’t really agree with her way of thinking at all, and in most ways, we’re from different planets. So it’s best to just say, “it is what it is” and not really argue with her about differences because they’re always gonna be there.
Hopefully as you get older, you guys will reach an understanding, but it's going to take one of you to be the bigger person and sort of cater to the other's character flaws, but not so much that you don't stay true to yourself. It's hard, but you can do it:) |
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| DigitalMP |
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
yea umm i dont get this story at all lol you got drunk because your boyfriend wouldn't watch something? and then your mom stole a bottle of vodka and blamed you? |
seriously...it hurt my head to read that. |
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| Lilith |
It's late, can't sleep, may as well write...
My mother was merely someone I was related to for most of my life up until she died, formative upbringing was by my grandmother, who at that stage in her life was in her 60's and a widower for close to 10 years... dumping the 'family bastard' on the doorstep just kind of exaggerated the existing insanity I think.
She was from upper/upper middle class english landowners which is a more or less inherited right to be eccentric as far as the middle and working classes are concerned, such a politically incorrect and a complete anachronism it was enough to make vegans, hippies, labour voters and socialists drop dead of shock at a 50 paces.
I could have complained, well I did complain only once usually about the backward practices of her but the alternative was being sent back to (then) apartheid south africa which would have been even less fun. Complaining twice was seen as bad manners and I'd get spanked, well up until the age of 7 I got away with comparative murder and childish rebellion as was accorded to brats of that age, after that I either learned to live in fear, run quickly or just cop it sweet with a hand or wooden spoon across my ass.
Things I wasn't allowed to do.
Hang out with kids from town
Swear or behave in a manner uncouth
Complain
Things I was allowed to do.
Get up at 5am, feed chickens
Go to ballet and ride the horses after school
5pm, chase chickens back in the coop and in bed by 8.
:mad:
She told people I just used to run around outside a lot, that's why I had a 'tan'... that didn't seem to disappear over winter but no one seemed to overly care too much or had the grace to ignore my heritage in so much as it didn't make a fuss. Nan swore she'd make my life a living nightmare if I did tell, though I'm at a loss of how to think how. Most of the kids my age I wasn't allowed to hang out with so my 'socialising' was done at school, anything else was with her friends and that was about as much fun as visiting an old folks home. Lavender, bad food, old houses that smelled like death waiting to happen and Sunday tea. If anyone to this day serves up pheasant, boiled cabbage or brussel sprouts, I'll bleed them out with carving knife through the lungs, smile sweetly and no one will be the wiser...
While my childhood up until the age of 12 was just a case of one protracted, awful finishing school for ladies mixed in with the odd bit of tyranny, it did teach me one thing.
Accepting the status quo because it's simply accepted good manners and civil decency to do so is a complete farce and if you are content to let people walk over you and don't accord you your opinion, then you will forever be that and have no right to complain about your station in life as just another doormat.
It's not to say that it should be done in a manner which is coarse or vulgar, but if you don't stand up for yourself, no one else will and no one who ever ended up a someone, ever did it by kissing ass. Kissing ass only gets you so far, sooner or later you've got to pony up some guts and talent. |
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| Slylee |
| quote: | Originally posted by Lilith
Accepting the status quo because it's simply accepted good manners and civil decency to do so is a complete farce and if you are content to let people walk over you and don't accord you your opinion, then you will forever be that and have no right to complain about your station in life as just another doormat.
It's not to say that it should be done in a manner which is coarse or vulgar, but if you don't stand up for yourself, no one else will and no one who ever ended up a someone, ever did it by kissing ass. Kissing ass only gets you so far, sooner or later you've got to pony up some guts and talent. |
ok now take that same exact outlook and put it in someone completely opposite of you whom you have to live with. it's ing torture really. lol
| quote: | Originally posted by Slylee
Hopefully as you get older, you guys will reach an understanding, but it's going to take one of you to be the bigger person and sort of cater to the other's character flaws, but not so much that you don't stay true to yourself. It's hard, but you can do it:) |
but your situation is obviously much more extreme, but it seems as though you would forever be fighting a no-win situation, so is it worth it? and for what? piece of mind over her? do u still talk to your grandma? |
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| gehzumteufel |
| omg my egg donor is ing off her rocker too! she blames my father for the fact that they have a tonne of kids (6 by him), she gets all pissed over stupid and then goes out and spends money they dont have then blames it on the kids for making her mad and tells her husband to choose her or his kids! omg and theres more but whatever. i cant stand her. |
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