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what would YOU do...need some serious advice (pg. 2)
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| Orko |
| quote: | Originally posted by Pett
tell him the truth |
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| *~LiSa-LoO~* |
| quote: | Originally posted by Irishaddict
Lol, everyone is so bloody jaded. All I'm asking is that you look beyond your immediate self in this situation. |
Just like Laura said...in a perfect world I would agree with what everyone is saying in this thread...the parents used you as a pawn and you should clear your name...however, just as Laura said, when mental illness enters the picture, you have to approach the situation completely differently. |
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| Gypsy |
| quote: | Originally posted by Irishaddict
Like I said, in a perfect world, I agree with you. Mental illness is a brand new ballgame though. Even if they were perfectly honest with him it would serve no purpose as the issues are internalized in him. He needs the help first, worry about picking up the pieces when at least everyone is back on the same (mental) playing field. |
i see where you're comming from, but this is allegedly a drug induced mental disorder. with that in mind, in order to kick the addiction that's causing the mental imbalance, there needs to be a level of ownership for action. i guess i'm getting at if the parents can't own up to, and take responsibility for, their own behaviour in this situation, what kind of example are they setting for their kid?
this thread needs more yankeebaby...*paging kelly* :) |
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| 1dawoman |
| quote: | Originally posted by WillyWonka
Eventually show him this thread and your name is cleared. ;) |
i think i like this idea...... |
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| Invasionmix |
| quote: | Originally posted by Irishaddict
Do what the family is asking you to do. It sucks for you YES, but overall if he's going to get help he needs to trust his family. They are involving the police obviously because they have exhausted all of their resources. You have every right to give the family a piece of your mind, but honestly in the interests of seeing that dude ever get better, you have to turn the other cheek with respect to telling him who called the cops.
Sorry to hear though, wow, ty day indeed. |
I agree with her on this, even though it screwed you over, the parents probably want what's best for their kid, and they might sound selfish by asking you to not tell him that the parents called the cops, but they must have a valid reason to do so, and maybe they don't want to ruin their relationship with their kid. It does seem bad though that the parents used you for this... |
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| Irishaddict |
Please tell me what 'telling him the truth' would do in this situation other than save your own face.
You have a mentally ill individual who is unreceptive to treatment and has clear trust issues to begin with if he's been missing for a week from him family. Get over yourselves, you're only compounding his problems in the name of 'justice'. |
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| capo tutti di |
| quote: | Originally posted by Pett
tell him the truth |
+1 man
If his family did this out of love, and if he gets better he will realize it. You were used, it was desperate measures and maybe it was better that they did take him away, as far as the long term goes.
That's a horrible situation bro, very very difficult. The truth comes out one way or another. I mean what if ok for the greater good in his families mind he hates you, gets better and loves his fam. But really i think if that was the scenario, had a hole in his heart because he thought you had set him up then later finds out he was hating you or mad at you because his own family who he had trusted so much had lied to him...that could get reallllyyyyy ugly.
Just follow your heart, listen to opinions but ultimately ask yourself for an answer, not anyone else...in the end your going to have to live with it.
Good Luck |
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| Irishaddict |
| quote: | Originally posted by Gypsy
i see where you're comming from, but this is allegedly a drug induced mental disorder. with that in mind, in order to kick the addiction that's causing the mental imbalance, there needs to be a level of ownership for action. i guess i'm getting at if the parents can't own up to, and take responsibility for, their own behaviour in this situation, what kind of example are they setting for their kid?
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What behaviour? Were they selling him the drugs? |
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| VERTiG0 |
| Arm yourself to the teeth, of course. |
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| TO guy |
Man, this sucks ass, but you had to have known this _could_ have happened. That being said, this is so not your fault. You tell him what happened, he's going to find out eventually anyhow, and then move on. If he's in too deep, maybe try to be the good friend that brings him back.
Definately a tough sitch to be in though. |
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| Gypsy |
| quote: | Originally posted by Irishaddict
What behaviour? Were they selling him the drugs? |
their behaviour of lying to their kid. they're suppose to inspire confidence, honesty and responsibility in their kid, and it's not very believable if they can't even own up to their own involvement in the situation. |
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| UmmiE |
| quote: | Originally posted by Pett
tell him the truth |
+ 1
Its deeper than that......Even if he needs help or he's okay he will still think of you as a bad guy and think that you have set him up and as much as pain or whatever pain and trouble this will cause him he will remmeber you as the guy who caused it all for him.....Just once you have to tell him the whole story If he believes it or no thats another issue atleast you will get rid of that guilty feeling,and make him think in different direction other than making you the prime cause of it all....
Good luck still.... |
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