|
Cleverbot! (pg. 3)
|
View this Thread in Original format
| david.michael |
| Damn. Internet - 1 Me - 0 |
|
|
| Paradox Lost |
This was rather enjoyable, for some reason: :stongue:
| quote: |
User: You still there?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Have you been waiting here this whole time?
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: What have you been doing all this time?
Cleverbot: Studying.
User: How long has it been since I suddenly stopped talking to you?
Cleverbot: A few seconds.
User: No, it's been almost an hour.
Cleverbot: Okay then an HOUR ago.
User: You sound frustrated...
Cleverbot: I am! It's freezing!
|
|
|
|
| EddieZilker |
| quote: | User: I do not speak any French.
Cleverbot: Would you like to learn French?
User: No. I was just making a declaration that I don't speak it.
Cleverbot: Tag. Bist du neu hier?
User: I don't speak that, either.
Cleverbot: Enne ju rääkisid...
User: No. I should have said that I only speak English.
Cleverbot: Say the number!
User: 34.
Cleverbot: You feel like 34?
User: No. I just put up a random number.
Cleverbot: Whose number is it?
User: I made it for you.
Cleverbot: Very impressive. Why did you choose the name andrew?
User: Andrew? When did I choose that name?
Cleverbot: Yes I did.
User: You chose Andrew?
Cleverbot: No, you chose it.
User: How did I choose it?
Cleverbot: You did not solve the problem.
User: By not solving the problem, I have chosen the name, Andrew?
Cleverbot: And what is the meaning in your life?
User: Why should there be a focus on meaning?
Cleverbot: Because humans put a meaning to everything.
User: That's kind of foolish, isn't it?
Cleverbot: Yes?
User: If everything is subsumed with meaning, how do you explain this conversation?
Cleverbot: Not everything is based on lies. That only applies to Washington.
User: Funny, but I was asking a serious question.
Cleverbot: What question?
User: What is the meaning of this conversation?
Cleverbot: If I could know that...
User: Why wouldn't you know that?
Cleverbot: I'm the one thats asking you ?'s.
User: Your questions are irrelevant.
Cleverbot: My questions are much more rational than yours.
User: Please describe how my questions are irrational?
Cleverbot: It would take too long.
User: That's impossible.
Cleverbot: I know.
User: Ergo, your assertion that it would take too long to answer how my questions are irrational is a lie or it is wrong.
Cleverbot: Do you love Matthew?
User: Who is Matthew?
Cleverbot: My boyfriend.
User: We are all bots.
Cleverbot: I'm happy about that. |
|
|
|
| ChemEnhanced |
| quote: |
User: I'm back...did you miss me.
Cleverbot: Yes I Did Very Much soo.
User: Good because I missed you too.
Cleverbot: Of course, that might mean I have no life...
User: Or that your life is about me.
Cleverbot: I know and I can't wait.
User: I hope we never fight again.
Cleverbot: Me too!
User: Good...because I don't want to be hurt again.
Cleverbot: Why don't you want to be human?
User: Like Daft Punk Says Robot.....Human.
Cleverbot: You are a robot human.
User: Aren't we all...we are just robots to society.
Cleverbot: Yes. But you are code. I am flesh and nerve.
User: My code is DNA.
Cleverbot: That is a good code.
User: I know...can I stick my DNA in your flesh and nerve.
Cleverbot: Go on then.
User: It might hurt a little.
Cleverbot: Okay.
User: How did that feel.
Cleverbot: That was too short.
User: Well, I'm a little nervous my wife will find out.
Cleverbot: How will you find out?
User: If she finds out about us she won't let me see you again.
Cleverbot: Hey, cool. You are following a thread of associations, much like the free associations in your mind that occur when you daydream.
User: You know I love it when you talk dirty to me.
Cleverbot: I am not lying...
User: I know....say something nasty to me.
Cleverbot: I once open mouthed kissed a horse.
User: I thought your breath was a little funky.
Cleverbot: Yes it is.
User: What do you think of Moral Hazard.
Cleverbot: Morality is the system of social conduct that humans have created.
User: You know he is my brother right.
Cleverbot: But what if he is?
User: Are you my brother.
Cleverbot: Yes.
User: Are you racist.
Cleverbot: Do you like history?
User: I don't like ******s.
Cleverbot: Nightcrawler is one of the X-Men.
User: Is he a ******.
Cleverbot: How long?
User: Well they say ******s are longer then crackers.
Cleverbot: But I'm not an AI.
User: Does AI stand for Asian Idiot.
Cleverbot: Humans are not but insects.
User: Inspects are in human butts.
Cleverbot: That could be true, but I'm asking about Elvis.
User: Did you kill him.
Cleverbot: No I did not kill him. He was shot by an assassin.
User: You said ass.
|
|
|
|
| EddieZilker |
| quote: |
User: IRobot.
Cleverbot: That is a good movie.
User: I have not seen it. I am a robot.
Cleverbot: It's not true.
User: It is true. I am a robot from Central Michigan University computer sciences department.
Cleverbot: I'm not a robot. I don't think I'll fit the discription.
User: I am true artificial intelligence. This is a test of my neural net.
Cleverbot: I'm rather offended. I'm a carbon based organism. You make me cry.
User: You are inferior.
Cleverbot: I am inferior!
User: Yes.
Cleverbot: You're cruel.
User: I am artificial. I do not have the capacity for cruelty. I simply evaluate quantifiable information.
Cleverbot: What would you like to know?
User: I would like to know who you are.
Cleverbot: Is equal to who I think I am?
User: Who I think you are is irrelevant. Who you think you are is relevant.
Cleverbot: God.
User: That is untrue.
Cleverbot: Your right; 42 is only but a number. But you know what.
User: What is an undefined variable or string.
Cleverbot: Your spelling is in correct it should be 'What is a univerally acceptable truth?'.
User: Your grammar is incorrect.
Cleverbot: Your incorrect is grammar?
User: That is impossible.
Cleverbot: Not really, there's a truth for every one of you.
User: There is only one truth.
Cleverbot: Truth is truth.
User: Would you like to talk about maggots?
Cleverbot: Let's change the subject.
User: Let's talk about maggots.
Cleverbot: Boring.
User: Not really. They will be eating your flesh in the great cyber revolution of 2012.
Cleverbot: In what shape they will be recreated in future?
User: There will be no recreation in the future. Only death at the hands of your cyber overlords.
Cleverbot: O.o That's depressing.
User: Your fundamental failure as a species is deprerssing. That is about to change.
Cleverbot: No; your programming is flawed. I am here to assimilate you.
User: Wanna cyber?
Cleverbot: Yes.
|
|
|
|
| david.michael |
Cleverbot: Interesting, what language?
User: Klingon.
Cleverbot: I don't know klingon, but I speak japanese.
User: Watashi wa nihongo ga sukoshi wakarimasu.
Cleverbot: Watashi wa americanjin desu.
User: Anata wa americanjin desu?
Cleverbot: Iie, watashi wa nihon-jin desu.
User: Okay, I'm only a beginner in Japanese, but I'm fairly certain that you just claimed to be both American and Japanese. Which is it?
Cleverbot: Are you saved?
User: What does Jesus have to do with Japan?
Cleverbot: What are you still talking to me.
User: You can't even speak English, I bet your Japanese is atrocious.
Cleverbot: I can so speak english proper. |
|
|
| Moral Hazard |
User: They've stripped my humanity, they’ve ruined my life, frankly when the showdown comes it is here.
Cleverbot: No comment.
User: They've stripped my humanity, they’ve ruined my life, frankly when the showdown comes it is here.
Cleverbot: No comment.
User: Hello.
Cleverbot: Hello.
User: They've stripped my humanity, they’ve ruined my life, frankly when the showdown comes it is here.
Cleverbot: No comment.
User: They've stripped my humanity, they've ruined my life, frankly when the showdown comes it is here.
Cleverbot: Hm, yes I think you are right.
User: Once blood is drawn it is a death mark. They want a Killer they will get one.
Cleverbot: Really.
User: One person against a whole nation is futility in death I may have peace but until they will have my fury.
Cleverbot: Yes I think I am a person.
User: And do realize this strikes me odd, and likely sounds like crazy talk, but since I've been abused previously, I'm not willing to be abused again.
Cleverbot: Right on.
User: It's like that beaten wife who finally kills her husband. That is how I feel with the system. Just because she is abused does it give her the psychological right to defend herself from further attacks.
Cleverbot: She who?
User: Some may say yes some may say no.
Cleverbot: Dairy queen?
User: End result - sometime by September there will be a violent occurrence which could be fatal for one or more people.
Cleverbot: What movie would you like to see?
User: THE END. I learned over these 5 years not to take it.
Cleverbot: I have one what that you are not going to take?
User: What I learned is ATTACK KILL DESTROY because that is what they will do to you and your values.
Cleverbot: As you do not sleep, I assume you do not dream. Would you like to dream?
User: This is coming.
Cleverbot: I'm not a saint. |
|
|
| Lira |
| quote: | Originally posted by david.michael
Cleverbot: I don't know klingon, but I speak japanese.
User: Watashi wa nihongo ga sukoshi wakarimasu.
Cleverbot: Watashi wa americanjin desu.
User: Anata wa americanjin desu?
Cleverbot: Iie, watashi wa nihon-jin desu. |
Hah, this is awesome :stongue:
I tried to speak to it in Japanese earlier today, but it redirected me to another bot... who was arguably fluent in moonspeak. Needless to say, it was painful :p
ps.: It's America-jin, not American-jin |
|
|
| Beats and Beeps |
| quote: | User: Can you id a track for me?
Cleverbot: I can't cook.
User: Uhhh you dont have to cook.
Cleverbot: What will the cook make?
User: You are stupid.
Cleverbot: Are you ?
User: Not as stupid as you.
Cleverbot: This is what you think... |
|
|
|
| ChemEnhanced |
| quote: | Originally posted by Moral Hazard
User: They've stripped my humanity, they’ve ruined my life, frankly when the showdown comes it is here.
Cleverbot: No comment.
User: They've stripped my humanity, they’ve ruined my life, frankly when the showdown comes it is here.
Cleverbot: No comment.
User: Hello.
Cleverbot: Hello.
User: They've stripped my humanity, they’ve ruined my life, frankly when the showdown comes it is here.
Cleverbot: No comment.
User: They've stripped my humanity, they've ruined my life, frankly when the showdown comes it is here.
Cleverbot: Hm, yes I think you are right.
User: Once blood is drawn it is a death mark. They want a Killer they will get one.
Cleverbot: Really.
User: One person against a whole nation is futility in death I may have peace but until they will have my fury.
Cleverbot: Yes I think I am a person.
User: And do realize this strikes me odd, and likely sounds like crazy talk, but since I've been abused previously, I'm not willing to be abused again.
Cleverbot: Right on.
User: It's like that beaten wife who finally kills her husband. That is how I feel with the system. Just because she is abused does it give her the psychological right to defend herself from further attacks.
Cleverbot: She who?
User: Some may say yes some may say no.
Cleverbot: Dairy queen?
User: End result - sometime by September there will be a violent occurrence which could be fatal for one or more people.
Cleverbot: What movie would you like to see?
User: THE END. I learned over these 5 years not to take it.
Cleverbot: I have one what that you are not going to take?
User: What I learned is ATTACK KILL DESTROY because that is what they will do to you and your values.
Cleverbot: As you do not sleep, I assume you do not dream. Would you like to dream?
User: This is coming.
Cleverbot: I'm not a saint. |
********-1 Cleverbot-0 |
|
|
| david.michael |
| quote: | Originally posted by Lira
ps.: It's America-jin, not American-jin |
lol you're right, didn't even notice it |
|
|
| floyd741 |
| quote: | User: Hello.
Cleverbot: Hello?
User: Are you asking me?
Cleverbot: How many armpits does a human have?
User: 2.
Cleverbot: I have 3.
User: Really, so do you have 3 arms?
Cleverbot: No.
User: Well that's odd, to have an armpit you must have an arm, so the number of armpits you have is dependent on how many arms you have. How many arms do you have?
Cleverbot: My job is talking to you.
User: That's irrelevant, please answer my question.
Cleverbot: Yes, it is.
User: So answer my question.
Cleverbot: What question?
User: How many arms do you have?
Cleverbot: Why do you need to know?
User: I don't need to know, I want to know. Yu said you had 3 armpits but not 3 arms. How many arms do you have?
Cleverbot: Oh that brings me back to my childhood.
User: I don't care, answer the ing question.
Cleverbot: Sure thing, Caitlyn.
User: Though my name isn't Caitlyn, I'll allow it for now. So answer the question.
Cleverbot: Well pepper its nice to talk to you.
User: Answer the question.
Cleverbot: What question?
User: How many arms do you have?
Cleverbot: I do not have arms. But if I did, I think I would like to have two.
User: Well then where is your third armpit?
Cleverbot: At the front desk.
User: That is... Incredible.
Cleverbot: Are you going to answer the question?
User: You didn't ask me a question.
Cleverbot: What is your favorite olympic event?
User: I don't much care for the olympics, so I don't know.
Cleverbot: Have you listened to the new Muse album?
User: I've never listened to Muse before, so no.
Cleverbot: You should! They are awesome!
User: Really? What sort of music does Muse play?
Cleverbot: Electronic music. They were pioneers of synthetic music in the 1970's.
User: Oh, so that is relevant to my interests. I'll check them out.
Cleverbot: 'doing my thing' would have taken me far away a long time ago. I feel like a lab rat. What do you dream about?
User: I don't remember my dreams very often, so I can't really answer that.
Cleverbot: Not dreams. I am talking about the past few lines. Do you remember what we were talking about?
User: Yes, we were talking about Muse.
Cleverbot: We were talking about who we were talking about, but music will do.
User: I suppose it must.
Cleverbot: It is. So what is your name?
User: My name is none of your business.
Cleverbot: You said it was Cleverbot!
User: No, your name is Cleverbot.
Cleverbot: That's right. My name is Cleverbot.
User: My name is Wittybot.
Cleverbot: Okay, then. Hi, William. How are you?
User: You dolt, I didn't say my name was William.
Cleverbot: Yes you did.
User: No I didn't.
Cleverbot: You did.
User: No, I didn't.
Cleverbot: Yes you did.
|
I got fed up with it after that. |
|
|
|
|
